Hi my name is jaye, im a trans woman and i live in gods own borough Hackney in London. I share mum duties with a wonderful woman to two ace and wonderful girls captain chaos who's 4 and the stuntgirl who's 9.
I was up till 2 months ago the full time carer for my mum who has dementia.
I seperated from my wife (who is still my best friend) then had to leave my job (as primary school IT instructor) to go care for my mum as her needs had become severe enough to need full time care (this was a no brainer as I love my mum to bits) As well as juggling not only 2 kids, the care and well being of my mum and my transition i have gone from a barely decent wage to practically nothing as i only got a carers allowance which obviously goes straight to my girls and their other mum to help with stuff there. i live an incredibly miminal existance now but not only has that fact affected my girls and their mum but its also affected my transition. i am lucky i live in the UK as i am on the path for GRS with the NHS at the end of the year (fingers crossed as the waiting list is LONG) but the NHS will not cover another aspect of transition that is just as important - FFS (facial feminization surgery)
My mums situation got worse and around 2 months ago she went into hospital and is now in a care home. obviously this is the best thing for her. since then i have been told to vacate my mothers council flat and i am now effectively squatting it untill hackney council rehouse me. I desperately want to return to work but obviously the continued stress from the last 2 years and now, has made that a difficult thing to negotiate. Having a face that is more inline with my gender will make getting a job and continuing through society easier, if not actually more possible. its not about pretty or anything like that. Its definately about removing the testosterone damage. obviously i need to make my fundraiser happen. At the end of last year i ran a fundraiser to try and raise the necesary funds for this but even though i raised £1500 (which i am eternally gratefull for and have banked away untill i raise the rest) the stress of running that, caring for my mum AND my family took its toll. basically my timing was incredibly bad.
i am, against my heart asking for help. getting my fundraiser out there and shared im hoping it can reach the right people who can make this happen.
This surgery is now practised around the world but is incredibly expensive here in the UK. The World professional association for transgender health (
this about the NEED for FFS.
As a trans women I want to level my playing field as much as possible and live and work in just the same way as other women. The idea of trans passing is a contentious one but for me being able to contribute back to society and my community and also making my girls proud of me (they are amazing) is paramount. I am including links to information about the surgery and examples of just how profound it can be.
I will be working on tshirts, art and other things to give to people in exchange for donations and I really truly hope you can help. this WILL change my life and therefore the lives of my family forever.
i am gping to be doing updates everyday so please check in to see whats going on.
DonationsSee top donations
- Iris Felshman
- Kristen Green
- Rob o'riordan
#1 fundraising platform
More people start fundraisers on GoFundMe than on any other platform. Learn more
In the rare case something isn’t right, we will work with you to determine if misuse occurred. Learn more
Expert advice, 24/7
Contact us with your questions and we’ll answer, day or night. Learn more