Hi friends, if you’re reading this, I want to assure you that I have tried everything in my power to avoid this very situation. From a very young age, I learned to work hard for the things I wanted in life. I’ve prided myself on being very independent and dedicated to whatever jobs I fell into, working 4am shifts at Starbucks straight into late nights in drag. But life hits us in unexpected ways. I’m now asking for help.

I have a history of lower back issues dating back over a decade ago. I was in a back brace for about a year in high school, healing stress fractures in that area. During pride month this past year, I started to feel some sciatic pain in my back and legs, but it was quickly alleviated with conservative treatment. However, the pain got worse until I was no longer able to get out of bed, and I started to experience a stabbing, immobilizing pain in my hip that ran throughout my leg late November. My mother rushed me to the ER for some scans; it turns out I have a severely herniated disc coupled with moderate stenosis, which is preventing me from performing in drag (my main form of income) due to “drop foot” or a loss of control/flexion in my left foot. All this to say, these past few months have not been kind to me.

Between the ER visit, scans, appointments that followed, and procedures down the line, I’ve depleted just about all my of savings. The excruciating physical pain and financial stress aside, feeling like I can’t show up as an entertainer the way I know I can is the ultimate form of punishment. To add insult to injury, after leaving my last job in 2024 to pursue artistic endeavors full time and go back to school to change my career, I could not afford private health insurance and was denied Mass Health. I’m at a loss for words how broken I’ve been feeling these past few months, but I’ve put on a brave face for a lot of people that look to me for just that.

Drag has been a labor of love, and I always promote the values that I learned growing up: kindness, respect, authenticity, and, most importantly, humility. You can’t keep a Havoc down, and I’d really appreciate your help during my time of need.

With all the queer love and joy in the world,

Thank you.

Justin, aka Harlow Havoc❤️‍