As many of you know, I have Coronary Artery Disease. I have 3 stents, with the most recent being placed in January 2018.
On May 31, 2018 I had a heart attack. I don't really want to tell this part, but rigorous honesty is the way. What happened prior to the heart attack was I took a handful of sleeping pills. Yes, I attempted to take my own life. The doctors are not sure exactly when the heart attack happened, but it definitely happened.
My triponins (are very sensitive and specific indicators of damage to the heart muscle (myocardium). They are measured in the blood to differentiate between unstable angina and myocardial infarction (heart attack) in people with chest pain or acute coronary syndrome) were tested. Normal levels are between 0.04-0.39 ng/mL. My levels were at 17.2.
Between the overdose of sleeping pills, the heart attack and the fact that I was not found for 3 1/2 hours, it is a miracle that I'm not dead.
What I know now is that it was clearly not my time to go. I have more to do in this life. I am not ashamed of what I did. I did it and thank goodness unsuccessfully. I know my experience will help someone else at some time in the future.
I was in the hospital for 7 days and then did not work for a week after the hospitaliztion. That, coupled with all the time I was not able to work earlier this year, has been a burden on me financially. When I don't work, I don't get paid.
I am going to California from June 23 - June 30. I am saying this, as I don't want anyone to think I'm paying for a vacation when I say I am unable to pay my bills. My mom and step-dad paid for this vacation for me, which was booked months ago. I am staying at their house and driving one of their cars while I am there. The trip is not costing me anything and I won't need money while I'm there.
I am working and getting as many clients scheduled as I can. I am starting a new Bob at a chiropractic office, which is part-time to start .I am behind on my health insurance, which is $500 per month and I have thousands of dollars in medical bills as well. I also have household expenses that I am responsible for, as well as car insurance, cell phone bill and day-to-day living expenses.
As I already said, I don't want to ask for help, but need to. If you feel so inclined to contribute, I would be forever grateful.
One of my ICU nurses said to me, "As long a you are breathing, you have a purpose." I am doing work with my therapist to really believe this, know this and live this.
Thank you for taking time to read this. I appreciate you.