I could feel my head hitting the ground through the broken glass, once then twice, the impact and survival instinct kicked in on the third roll, I remember thinking to myself "pull your head in!!! Pull your head in" time had slowed the car kept rolling. The force greater than any rollercoaster I could imagine. Only milliseconds earlier We were driving home from Taber late on a December night . 5 years ago my band and I were in a serious rollover car crash. Long story short I was injured. 2 herniated discs in my L4-L5 and L5-S1 spinal area. I waited on the Canadian surgery list for 2 years. I've lived in chronic debilitating pain for 3 years. At the time I was waiting for my first surgery the pain day in and day out began to wear on me. It started slowly but began to creep in, worsening with every week that past. I began to lose very basic abilities. I could no longer drive, I lost feeling in my feet 3+ years ago, going from sitting to standing was agony. Walking became agony. When I wasn't working I was in my bed. I walked with a cane and was at the max limit for opiate prescription pain meds. The pain was/is non stop. There is no break. It's a nagging quality of life altering type of pain that limits almost everything I do. My job played a major part in me pushing as long as I did. I inevitably reached a point where life was no longer worth living in that amount of pain. In September 2014 j attempted suicide. Needless to say the attempt failed but nothing I did could help me get the quality of life that I had years earlier back. My heart was broken and I needed out. A decision was made at this time for me to go have surgery in the USA. With a price tag of $25,000 USD.
I had the surgery October of last year. The pain was reduced for a few months but came crawling back in to debilitate me once again. I'm back where I started. The surgery I found out failed. And in the words of my spinal doctor in calgary "it's the same..." All the suffering recovery and pain from the first surgery was in vain. To top it all off when I returned to work after the surgery I was let go. I'm now unemployed and waiting yet again for another surgery on the same exact disc. It's scheduled for December. Finances are obviously extremely tight at this point as I've been without work for almost a year now. The funds in hoping to raise are firmly recovery period. I've been able to take some temp work to supplement my income but I'm limited with what I can do because of the constant pain. If you know me you know how hard I've tried to stay positive throughout. But even positivity has its limits. To be forced into 2 surgeries in the span of a year has been an enormous burden. Any help would be greatly appreciated.
Much love,
Joy