Rowan’s top surgery

My names Rowan.

I came out as Non-binary in December of 2020 and have been on testosterone since May this year. I’m absolutely awful at asking for help but I’m gonna try anyway.

I’ve always known I was trans, before I even knew what the term meant. My whole life I’ve struggled to feel connected to my body. It feels as though my skin isn’t my own.

Even though starting hormones has helped alleviate this feeling to an extent, there’s still something that causes me more stress and pain than anything combined. My chest.

Top surgery, if you’re not sure what it is, is a subcutaneous mastectomy (complete removal of breast tissue) and reconstruction of the nipples to create a more masculine chest.

I quite literally fantasise about this daily. I wonder what It’d be like to finally feel a T-shirt against my skin. To swim in the sea topless and feel the wind on my chest. I dream about the day I no longer have to wear a binder that’s constricts my breathing. These may sound like little moments but to me they’re huge. They’re the moments I’m trying to stay alive for.

Top surgery isn’t a cosmetic thing, it’s something I desperately need to feel comfortable in my body. It would mean the absolute world to me if you could help me achieve this. Donations, however small, and sharing my go fund me are greatly, greatly appreciated! :)