I still can’t believe that it’s officially been 2 years since the passing of my father but as I suspected, it still hurts as much as the day we found out the news. At this time, I ask that you read the rest of this message with an open heart.
When I learned of my father leaving this earth my heart shattered into a million little pieces. The pandemic had just started and he felt it would be best to spend that time in his home country, but little did he know that the country he was birthed and raised in would ultimately turn their backs on him. When he arrived there, he was immediately forced to quarantine in a hotel for 14 days. My dad had recently been diagnosed with diabetes and needed help from nurses to administer medication, but guests were not allowed to leave their rooms or have any visitors, despite the fact that it was a designated quarantine hotel with no doctors or nurses on-site. 6 days after being in the hotel, my father’s time here came to a sudden end. We spent days and weeks trying to get answers and all the hotel did was be defensive and involve their attorneys. With the help of social media, I was able to get in touch with a journalist in the country who connected me with the woman that was next door to his room. She recalled how helpless she felt as she heard his cries for help, but the hotel refused to call an ambulance for him because of their concerns for Covid. They left him there screaming for hours and I will probably be haunted by that image for the rest of my life. My dad deserved so much more.
In the months to follow, I can say that I’m truly grateful for the love and support I’ve received from family and friends. They’ve helped me learn ways to let light back in; Taught me that grief is not linear and that when things feel hard/unbearable that it’s okay to ask for help, which is why I’m sharing this with you all.
Figuring out how to navigate life without him these last two years has been a very difficult/painful process for us. When you come from an immigrant home, like I do, the father is typically the breadwinner/decision-maker. My father, being the amazing person that he was, kept all the stress of maintaining a home, taking care of a sick wife and funding the household entirely on his own. Even with the little resources he came to this country with, my father did an INCREDIBLE job of keeping us all comfortable, and able, to obtain opportunity.
Today I am asking for help with something that feels so scary/vulnerable to ask for, but at this point I don’t have many options. My father, unknowingly to us, did not have a will in place when he passed away nor any designation of his estate. With him passing in an international country, and at the start of a global pandemic, we lost a year and a half of time not being able to access to his finances because we were unable to get a death certificate. We eventually had to hire a lawyer to assist and discovered a few debts that have put our family at risk of losing our home in less than 2 months. My dad sacrificed his entire adult life working to buy a home for our family, and next generations to come, and upon learning all of this is where I begin my fight to keep it.
Since the beginning of the pandemic, I’ve spent 100% of my savings and earnings paying for the mortgage, utilities, groceries, legal fees and making payments towards loans and credit card debt, for my mom and our house but it still hasn’t been enough. It’s humbling to say, but I’ve lost so much momentum in my entrepreneurial endeavors because I’ve been focused on working through my grief and trying to make enough money to cover everything. I am not in a position financially to take care of myself, my mom, my little sister AND pay off all of the debts on the house in time.
So, I am coming to you all today to ask, if it is in your heart & spirit to do so, to contribute to this fund. All donations will be put towards the mortgage and outstanding debts to save our home. If you’re unable to contribute, I’d appreciate you simply sharing it. I’m thankful for the support of friends and family during this time and ask that you would continue to keep my family in your prayers.