A Professional Asshole Still Needs Your Kindness

Hi.

Most of you know me through my theatre activities; specifically, my long association with Vs. Theatre. Through Vs, I have been an active member as a writer and director, but you likely know me best for my alienating comments about all things theatrical and (although I am always right) how those comments have been known to mildly piss people off.

Those of you who have been following my medical journeys during the past four years know of my long struggles with breathing (undiagnosed), and tremors accompanied by confusion and delirium (also undiagnosed).

I recently suffered a days-long bout of the tremors that included the advanced delirium as well as body-wide incontinence and loss of balance. This sent me to St. Joseph Medical Center in Burbank where it was discovered that my right foot and leg had been attacked by necrotizing fasciitis (“flesh-eating disease”). This came as a huge shock to everyone involved — especially me — and became the immediate galvanizing concern for a vast team of surgeons, specialists, nurses, staff and (I would soon learn) medical insurance professionals.

After two surgeries, with more to come, and an extensive array of antibiotics and other medications, I was released to a rehab center where I am currently staying for several weeks as physical and occupational therapists work with me every day to ensure the best chances for me to keep my foot and leg (although I have been informed that I am likely to lose at least a couple of toes, which is our best case scenario).

What has been most shocking, though, in all of this, is that with even what most would call excellent medical insurance, is the amount of up-front, out-of-pocket expenses I have had and will continue to have throughout the healing process and after. So far I’ve been able to meet the demands, but like most of you, a hit of just an unexpected few thousand dollars can cause sleepless nights.

So that’s where, I guess, you come in. I estimate that my medical expenses — for medical equipment, home health care, continued PT and OT, transportation, etc. — over the next six months will be somewhere between $20,000 to $30,000. That’s a daunting total for me, but I’m guessing that $10 or $20 might just be doable for you. If you have enjoyed my criticism, insults and general professional assholery — especially if you’ve been on the receiving end of any of those — surely that’s worth giving up an overpriced Starbucks drink or two. The ask is small, but it IS somewhat urgent.

The good, non-monetary news is that I’m receiving excellent medical care and there hopefully will come a time in the not-too-distant future when I’ll be available again to brighten everyone’s day. The only thing that might keep this from happening is if you don’t contribute even the smallest amount and let me die.

That is on you.

;-)

Michael

P.S. If you’re in the need for a 10-minute, one-act or even full-length play on any subject, I can be commissioned rather cheaply to produce a work that will change lives in magical ways.  For a sampling of my plays, click here .