Ryan's Rehab Fund

I have never been one to share much of my personal life on social media, however, due to the overwhelming pain that I feel as a mother, I have decided to share my story.


My son Ryan suffers from sever depression and drug addiction. It started when he was about 15 or 16 years old. We would smell marijuana from time to time or he would get caught drinking. I thought for the longest time that he would grow out of this behavior. I thought he was only doing what his friends were doing. Throughout the past 8 years, Ryan has had ups and downs, but ultimately his addiction and illness has worsened. 


For years I thought that I could love him through his addiction. I quickly realized that a mother's love is not a cure for drug addiction. I read somewhere that the addict and the addicts mother are the "sickest of the sick." The addict cannot stop drinking and doing drugs and the mother has her own addiction of enabling and saving her child. The vicious cycle then continues. I have been in denial off and on for several years. I know in my head that I did not cause Ryan's depression and addiction, and I cannot cure it. Despite everything in my head, in my heart I have always thought I could "love him" through it. 


This disease not only affects his life but his family's as well. I am scared of loosing my son to drugs. I want to believe that God has a plan for Ryan's life, but even I second guess that some days. Ryan is a very smart, capable, talented, and handsome young man. He has the potential to live a happy and healthy fulfilling life, but he has to overcome this illness first. 


On August 1st, Ryan checked himself into Ridgeview Institute to be treated for substance abuse. He alone made the decision to go. He is tired and doesn't want to live this way any longer. I am telling my story because I am proud of my son. I will not be embarrassed or ashamed. It's the stronghold that this disease has on his life that makes me angry. 


The treatment facility that he is in has come highly recommended to our family, and we have personally heard the success stories of patients who went through their program.


Ryan does have insurance, however, even with insurance available to him, this will not be enough to cover his treatment. I feel you cannot put a price on your child's life, but we do not have the financial means to pay for all of the treatment expenses. We as a family have decided to set up a gofundme to try to try to raise money for his expenses and hopefully to raise awareness of depression and of drug and alcohol addiction. Thank you friends from the bottom of my heart for listening to my story.