Help Escape a Toxic Home for a Fresh Start

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Hi i’m Bella.. I'm creating this GoFundMe because I am in an incredibly difficult, toxic, and dangerous living situation with my mentally ill mother, who has been emotionally and physically abusive for years. My heart has been shattered again and again, repeatedly because of her. She has completely ruined my entire life, completely intentionally. Since my grandfather’s passing, her mental health has severely declined, and it’s become impossible for me to live under her control. She has intentionally sabotaged my life by taking everything I’ve owned, including money, valuables, and even my future. I am having constant panic attacks and break downs now and am getting scared for my mental health. She manipulates my autistic brother and uses him as a tool to avoid accountability for her actions. I am trapped in this environment with no way out.

I’m currently unable to afford to leave, and I’m asking for help to gather enough funds to escape. My mom has locked me out of basic necessities, like food, and constantly steals from me, selling my possessions for money. I have changed my door knob lock multiple times on my bedroom door so she can not get into my room and steal my things anymore. She was just previously arrested for theft. She has stolen my taxes, stimulus checks, she takes my mail and lies about it. I won’t get cards sent here because she will take them. This has been a huge problem living here for a long time. I have to lock my bedroom door when i leave the house. She has stolen me and my brother’s electronics (xbox, switch, playstations, etc etc etc) and will pawn it for money and i just have to “be okay with it.“ There is too much she has taken from me and my siblings and CONTINUES to lie about. There hasn’t been a Christmas in years. The thought of December makes me want to cry. I’ve had her blocked on my phone now for months because i was so tired of her yelling at me.

There is no more family here that wants me. I feel abandoned. She will hide the pots and pans in her room so i can not cook anything along with the rest of the food she hides in there. I am not allowed to go anywhere other than my room. She is ruining my life. My father is not in the picture as he left when I was little, got remarried, and started another family. I have no other family i feel comfortable with. My mental health is deteriorating under the stress, and I feel like I'm drowning and it’s only getting worse. My girlfriend also lives here with me, and she's equally stuck. We’re both scared to leave the room we call "home," as we have no support system and no way of getting out.

I’ve reached out to CPS multiple times, but nothing has been done, and I feel utterly powerless. Another difficult obstacle is, I do not have a car. I can drive but do not have any sort of transportation for myself to get anywhere right now. My cramped bedroom is the only sense of safety i have left. I can’t recognize her and it hurts. I don’t ask for help really ever, but I can’t continue living in this situation. I am heartbroken. I need to be free—to be happy and live my life. I am working as hard as i can to get us out of here but it’s still not enough. Anything you can contribute would be deeply appreciated to help me get a car and start over, away from this toxic and controlling environment. Thank you for reading and for any support you can offer.

(As of right now she is a fugitive which means she is wanted for a crime in the state)

Here is a photo of her putting A Rope Lock that needs a KEY on the fridge so I CAN NOT EAT.

this was my treatment because she was mad at me

This is an example of how controlling she is. Keep in mind, i have an autistic brother here (he is 11) that also needs to EAT and SEES stuff like this being normalized.. He also is not in school? she pulled my brother out of school last YEAR and he just sits at home all day. He is very smart and very capable of going to school so i don’t know why she did this.. he also knows she is crazy and is aware of what she does to us.

Here is the MOLD that will sit for days in my kitchen and she will CONTINUE TO FEED IT to my autistic brother. MEAT that sits out for DAYS. we have a mold problem all through out the house that i have addressed to her MULTIPLE TIMES and she doesn’t care. The house is completely unsanitary and disgusting. she doesn’t clean. There’s cabinet doors falling off in the kitchen. Mold literally everywhere.

the bag about to explode bc of the pressure of the air from being out so long (it’s meat)

bacon left in microwave for months

chicken fries for my little brother that’s been out for days and reheats it

she leaves stuff on the stove for days and it grows mold

pizza sits in the fridge

pie that sits out for months and she doesn’t care

very bad mold problem in the air vents

on the walls

UPDATE*** she removed the Lock off the fridge but then i came back to this note on the door after she took the lock off. For NO reason. My own mother does this to me. I feel confused and scared.