“She stood in the storm and when the wind did not blow her way, she adjusted her sails.” – Elizabeth Edwards

I don’t remember the exact date but I will never forget the day that changed my mother’s life forever. My name is Thomas Tate, I’m a husband, a father of three, a brother and a son. I’m here to introduce you to the strongest woman I’ve ever known, my mom Mena Tate.

It was the spring of 1999, I was 25 years old and hadn’t yet left the comfort of my parents home. I answered a phone call from my mother’s doctor’s office. It was a mundane phone call, just a reminder for her to attend a mammogram the next day. It’s not unusual for a woman my mother’s age to have a mammogram but I remember hanging the phone up with a powerful sense of dread. I don’t know why, I’m not claiming to be psychic, it wasn’t a premonition, it was just a gut feeling. A few weeks later, on May 24th 1999, my worst fears were realized. My mother was diagnosed with stage 2 breast cancer. This marked the beginning of the fight for her life that rages on to this day.

Christopher Reeve described a hero as “an ordinary individual who finds the strength to persevere and endure in spite of overwhelming obstacles”.  I cannot think of a better description for my mom. No matter what life has thrown at her she has always persevered with grace, humility, and a sense of humour. Not only is she fighting the Cancer, she is also living with Crohn’s disease and Lymphodema. When she was initially diagnosed her first thoughts were about her family, and me. She hid her fear and downplayed the devastating news to protect everyone around her. She is a mother to me and my sister Stephanie who is a severely handicapped child, and a sister to a brother who suffers from early onset Alzheimer’s disease; she has always been the caregiver. She is a devoted wife, the most loving grandmother you’d ever see, and a special friend. She is deeply loved by so many because she has touched so many lives. She is my hero because she suffers in silence, fights with everything she has and continues to give to everyone around her.

After her initial diagnosis she endured a lumpectomy, 2 rounds of chemotherapy and 25 radiation treatments. She spent 5 years on Tamoxifen and an additional 5 years on Femara. In 2010 she was cancer free. However, in 2012 it came back with a vengeance.  Despite the lumpectomy, a mastectomy, endless radiation treatments, and countless attempts at chemotherapy the Cancer persists. She has an 11cm tumor in her chest and spots on her liver and spine. As of February 2016 an Estrogen blocker has replaced the chemotherapy but at this time surgery is not an option.

Throughout her battle what has impressed me the most is her constant search for alternative and holistic treatments. From Vitamin C injections to Nutritionists to Supplements, the monetary cost has been substantial. Thousands of dollars have been spent on every glimmer of hope but it’s her will to live that doesn’t allow her to give up, not even for a minute. Recently we have researched a new treatment called SEF (pronounced “safe”) Chemo. SEF stands for Side Effect Free. It is a new treatment that the renowned Dr. Kenneth Matsumura of the Berkley Institute of California has championed. The success rate of this innovative new treatment is inspiring and has changed many lives in a short time. The administration of this new treatment requires specially trained personal, at a specially designated treatment center, all of which comes at cost. One dose of this treatment costs anywhere from $4000 to $6000 US. If my mother needs 10 to 15 treatments the cost would be upwards of $50,000. Not the type of money an average family has on hand and that is the reason I am writing this. We need your help. We are out of options, we are here not because we want to be, we are here because we have to be.

Cancer is a terrifying and isolating disease. Even surrounded by love the fight is yours and yours alone. No matter how hard I try I cannot put myself in my mother’s shoes. No matter how hard I try I cannot go through this for her. I look at her tired little body and wonder how much more she can take. I know my mother, and I see things others can’t see. I see the fear in her eyes. I feel her pain. I see the tears behind the smiles. I can’t imagine what it is like to go to sleep at night knowing that Cancer is aggressively ravaging your body. I cannot imagine the strength it takes to fight day after day, week after week, month after month, yet still smile at life’s simple pleasures. Her faith and optimism not only keeps her going but keeps our whole family in a positive place. Family is her life. She lives for her grandkids (Olivia-14, Justin-11, and Jackson-18 months) and thrives on their energy. I want her to find some peace of mind. I want to provide her with more hope than she has ever had.  She asks for nothing but gives so much. So I am asking for her.

Please help my mother’s fight in anyway you can. Every cent is appreciated more than you know and the love that goes along with every donation will be felt long after the money is gone. Thank you for taking the time to read my mother’s story and thank you in advance for any donation you can make.