Support Zev’s Journey into the Wilderness

Hello! I’m Zev Spaner, I'm a twenty year old college student from New Mexico. I am currently trying to take a gap year from college to attend an intensive wilderness therapeutic program called Open Sky. During this time of COVID, my mental health and addiction have reached a point where I no longer feel in control of my life.

Open Sky assists teens and young adults struggling with challenges and difficult life circumstances. I, like many young adults, was motivated after high school to make the full-fledged move into the maturity of adulthood, going straight to college and into the workforce. That's what I thought was best for my future. While attending college, I found myself struggling internally with ongoing self-doubt, lack of motivation for everyday tasks, substance abuse, depression, feeling isolated because of my addiction, and struggling to process a lot of anxiety and internalized trauma.

I was born three months premature, living the first 3 years of my life in and out of hospitals. I sustained multiple invasive procedures from the time I was born. I continue to carry these early traumatic experiences in my body, that are fueling patterns of self-harm, while also damaging my relationships. All of this trauma created severe attachment “confusion” and other difficulties, with which I continue to struggle. Despite my traumatic birth, I've become remarkably resilient. My mom saw in me from the first day a soul with a deep desire to survive, to thrive, and to experience life. I am highly creative and have an intense desire to fully embrace my life.

I graduated in 2019 from an arts high school. I want to be able to continue pursuing my passion for the arts, specifically writing, literature and philosophy. Unfortunately, my early childhood trauma has led to a variety of destructive coping mechanisms. With my addiction I have created a cycle of abuse and trauma that I don't have the tools to cope with. My first year at college showed me that I was powerless against both my addiction and the trauma in my life, and that I can't trust myself. I am hoping that the Open Sky program can support me in cultivating tools to empower me moving forward.

Open Sky creates a container for young adults to cultivate core skills in self care, awareness, and relationships. Being in the wild will support me while I work to heal these unhealthy patterns, in a way that feels held and connected in community. I am hoping to find clarity and to experience the power of nature to heal and find a deeper sense of purpose.


Thank you for helping me on my journey of self healing. I am not financially able to pay for this program on my own. While my family is supporting me, it feels important for me to lead this campaign as part of taking responsibility for my own future. Your care and assistance will make it possible. The opportunity to go to Open Sky, to accept myself in my challenges, is truly a gift.

My goal is to begin at Open Sky starting mid-October. The cost of attending Open Sky totals between $40,000-50,000, depending on how long I need to stay (up to  3 months). The $27,175 I am raising in this campaign will cover my first 35 days at Open Sky. Then I will receive $12,000 in combined grants and scholarships, extending my participation in the program another 20 days. After that, if I need more time in the program, a second campaign may be needed to cover the remainder of my stay.

If my journey speaks to you or inspires you, please share this campaign with others. Thank you again for your support.

Sincerely,

Zev



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My name is Munay. I am Zev's mom. All funds raised in this campaign will be withdrawn and placed in my personal bank account, from which Open Sky will be paid.

Again, thank you for all of your support.