who could've known what 2020 would be like?  hasn't it brought changes on all parts of the scale, world-wide and in our personal lives?  some people knew of it. prophets like Johnny Enlow wrote about it, taking note that unprecedented things would happen, and that culture would get a reset.  things that had waited a long time would suddenly happen.

on august 3rd i got news that a rare sarcoma was discovered during the pathology report on a hysterectomy i had in late july.  shock waves went through the household and through our hearts; all our plans (or many of them) dissolved before us, and suddenly we had a new focus.  my caring bridge page  details some of those moments we experienced on our way to deciding on treatment.  we had conversations, shed tears, embraced a lot.

when I look past the disease diagnosis and all the requisite responses we've made, it been easy to see that new things are happening in the backdrop of our lives -- personal growth in me , positive changes in my marriage. I've been hoping for this growth for a long time. even as early as January 2019, i'd grown convinced that it's of utmost importance to get centered on what I really want to be doing with my time on earth.
so i see outwardly that we have spent lots of time on the cancer thing, but it's having a great effect of bringing things into perspective.  the pandemic caused us all to slow down.  this situation has pressed it even further - slow down, slower, slower.  do less, and then less (the nausea of cycle one pressed this one on me). 
in some ways the cancer thing is just a vehicle stimulating us to come together and concentrate our focus on only a few things (which can be kind of glorious actually).  we can only see a little of the impact it's having on our lives right now. the rest will be revealed later.

many you all have already been at it, taking our concerns to the throne room of heaven. some of you have served us physically - errands, hanging clothes rods in our new closet, driving, making food. you've sent cards and packages. earbuds and a laptop. some have sent cash and then sent it again. if there are others of you who'd like to give financially, we're making it available now to send a gift. while there's no expectation at all, we know you might like a way to be a part of this adventure.

thanks again to all of you for literally surrounding us in this time.

and don't forget as you join in, nudging your elbow into god's side whispering our names, that rest and worship are also forms of warfare in the kingdom.  take a nap!