Dear friends, If you haven't already read it, my original appeal for financial assistance is below. It outlines what help I needed and why. Today, one year later, I am still clean and sober. But I still need your help. This past year has been a journey I never could have predicted. I thought that once I detoxed from substances and learned some basic tools of recovery I would be fine. What I didn't know is that addiction is a disease that lives in the brain forever. It's always waiting. I still battle unbearable cravings although they are less frequent as the months go by. I also had no idea that I was using substances to manage mental health issues I didn't even know I had. After being clean for a number of months and still struggling, my psychiatrist put me through a rigorous assessment and diagnosed with me Adult Attention Defecit Disorder and Bipolar Disorder. The ADD meds helped enormously and for a while I thought I was on the mend, but unfortunately they triggered a bipolar episode and I spent 9 days in the psych at St Mike's. That was in December. Since then they've been trying to get me stabilized on bipolar meds before reintroducing the ADD meds. It's a long process. The result of all this is that I haven't been able to work. As I didn't reach my initial goal I had to borrow from my mom's line of credit to fund my stay at Homewood and supplement my income over the last 12 months. I'm on disability but it doesn't cover the bills. And now I'm at a point where I can't make the minimum payments. Any small donation towards paying off my Homewood debt would help me enormously. As you can see from my original campaign, it definitely adds up. Either way, I appreciate your love and support more than you could ever know. ********** You probably know me as happy and smiley :) That is me, on the outside. Inside it's a very different story. It is hard for me to admit this to the world, but I know I join countless brave women and men who have come forward with their sexual abuse stories. As a child, I was severely and repeatedly abused by a neighbour. Trauma inflicted on a child affects the development of the brain in multiple areas, compromising sufferers' capacities for pleasure, engagement, self control, and trust (Van Der Kolk, 2015) For decades I have battled depression, anxiety, irrational phobias, nightmares, flashbacks, insomnia, eating disorders, obsessive compulsive disorder, and substance abuse. During the last several years my PTSD has seriously inhibited my ability to work. My symptoms have now become unmanageable and I need help. "Ms. Tanya Speight has been diagnosed with Post Traumatic Stress Disorder in the context of severe and persistent sexual trauma inflicted upon her as a child.... The experience of sexual trauma in childhood has a profound impact on a person's ability to experience intimacy , trust and faith in the world around them. When a child is violated in such a manner they suffer profound emotional, psychological, psychosexual and physical damage that often requires extended treatment... Ms. Speight has reached a point in her recovery where inpatient residential treatment is strongly recommended for containment of the emotional dysregulation that is an expected, albeit unsettling part of the process of recovery." - Dr. Mara Goldstein, Psychiatrist, St. Michaels Hospital, from a letter to the Criminal Injuries Compensation Board. I am seeking help in funding an 8 week program at the Homewood Health Centre, in Guelph, ON that treats addiction and PTSD concurrently. This combined treatment is rare and Homewood offers the cheapest option I can find at $320/day. I have half the money myself and am entering the program in late March. If you can spare a small donation I will be eternally grateful. Every little bit helps. I also want to thank my wonderful parents, step-parents, and amazing sister for their help and support. Thank you for reading :) http://www.homewoodhealth.com/health-centre