Kira, my wife of 35 years, was sadly taken from me. We battled long and hard, but lost the war. The war against cancer.
We decided to move to Tampa, Fl. last year. Our daughter is down here, with her 3 kids. Kira was so badly wanting to spend more time with her adorable grand kids. Our daughter and her husband finally settled here, and the decision was made to follow.
We signed a contract on a new construction, sold the house in Ga., and moved into an apartment a few miles away. Due to covid and supply chain issues, the house was taking longer than expected. The lease on the apt. was coming due and we decided to move to a townhome in the new area. I would give us more time to see the grand kids, and allow us to better oversee the construction progress.
In late May, during the week before the big move, Kira was feeling some pain in her lower abdomen. Since there would be a lot of boxes being moved around and unpacked, I suggested a trip to the ER, incase she had a hernia or something.
Cancer. Smack in the face. Ovarian Cancer.
Her doctors were all positive that 6 rounds of chemo w/ three month intervals and a hysterectomy would cure her, and there would be some maintenance infusions to prevent recurrence. It was decided that the surgery would be in Georgia, with the surgeon that we met during her hospital stay, when she was 1st diagnosed.
ok. On board.
A week before her 2nd treatment, we finally moved to Tampa (a month later than planned). We hooked up with the 1st oncologist’s colleague, that he knew since college. Again, the doctor was positive for a clear outcome. Her ca125# was steadily dropping, her treatments would be successful.
After each treatment, Kira would have a period of time that she was nauseous, and had trouble with taste and texture all through. After the 6th and final treatment, Kira rang the bell. Finished w/ chemo. But the nausea period just stayed, and tolerable food menu was shrinking. Eggs, apple sauce, baked potato. Eggs fell off shortly before surgery. But we’re ready for surgery. The end is near and there’s a light at the end of the tunnel. We were going to make it. Stay strong. Almost there.
Surgery was 4 weeks after her last treatment. It was going to be laparoscopic, and the surgeon was confident that it would go perfectly smooth, and recovery would be short. 8 hour drive up to Ga, a few days to start feeling better and an 8 hour drive back to Fl. We can do this.
Smack in the face #2. Not ovarium cancer. Primary Peritoneal Cancer
“Her abdomen is completely full of tumors. Her omentum is that thick (holding his fingers up about 2” apart) and wrapped around her spleen and her liver. We drained 2 liters of fluid from her abdomen. “ He was shocked. “But don’t worry. You can fight this. You’re young and strong. We opened her up, and took samples of tumors, samples of her omentum, and the fluid and will be sending it to pathology to test down to the cell, so we know exactly how to treat it.” I was called up from the waiting room 1 hour after her surgery started for this news. I then had 3 hours of waiting, for Kira to come out of recovery. Alone. Unbelievable. Can’t be. WTF!!! This is supposed to be over.
Once she came out of recovery, and was starting to be more alert, I had to break the news to her. “But don’t worry, we can fight this.”
The surgeon came in to see Kira a while later, confirming what I had already told her. He reassured that she was young and strong and they’ll have all of the information sent from the pathology report, to her oncologist.
Again, don’t worry, we can fight this.
We got back to Florida, and I got settled back in to helping Kira. We visited the oncologist “don’t worry, we can fight this”, and were scheduled for a new 1st treatment of chemo.
Kira was literally withering away in front of my eyes over the 4 weeks after surgery. She was unable to eat much of anything, and drinks were merely sips. Anything more was vomited up. I took her in to the hospital two times, due to dehydration.
She received the first new treatment on Tuesday, 11/22. Friday the 25th, She was having some trouble finishing sentences, and having difficulty focusing.
I drove her to the hospital where her oncologist was, so that he could be involved as he needed to be. She was given fluids to treat dehydration, & had a ct scan to check for stroke, as well as for any spread of cancer to the brain.
On Saturday the 26th, she was more incoherent and less focused. Her eyelids were droopy. They sent her to the icu for more tests and more attention. It was determined that her acid levels in her blood were high, and her body was reacting to the raised levels. Once they get the levels under control, she should be fine. Not so positive.
When we arrived on Sunday the 27th, Kira was breathing verrry rapidly and verrry labored. It was suggested to put her on a respirator to help control her breathing. She would be sedated, and would not be able to speak around the tube, but she will be able to hear and respond to you.
About 10 am on Sunday, the neurologist pulled me aside “I am so sorry but somebody has to tell you what’s going on”.
We went to the icu waiting room.
Smack in the face #3
The acid levels were not dropping. The cancer was the cause of her raised levels. There was nothing else that they could do. Once the respirator tube was pulled, she may have an hour, a day, or a week.
We decided to leave the tube in place, as family was on their way, until Tuesday.
The next 2 days were spent making sure that as many people that could make it into town would see her, and as many people that could be called would have a chance to talk to her. Her eyes would light up when somebody new arrived, or called in.
On Tuesday, the pulmonary doctor came to pull the tube out. He explained what he was going to do, and asked Kira if she was ready. She shook her head “no”. “do you want to leave it in?” “yes.” The doctor left the room, and Tyler suggested a piece of paper. “yes”. She wrote “What’s Happpppppening?” I had to tell her that the cancer had gotten too bad. It was causing the acid levels to go high. Her body was shutting down. Her gaze went away from us. After some time, she appeared to have dozed off. We took a break.
After the break, her cousin that she hadn’t seen in a long time arrived. her spirits were higher. It was determined that we’d wait until Wednesday.
Again, everyone that could, spent time with her. Everyone that could be reached were able to speak to her. Tuesday evening, and Wednesday. Wednesday after noon, another cousin that she hadn’t seen in a long time arrived. Again she lit up and enjoyed a special time. Later, she wrote “call nurse” “Take tube out”. She would now be unconscious. We all spent the afternoon, holding her hand and each others.
Thursday morning at 5:30, I got the phone call. Kira Lynn Pluhar, my wife of 35 years, the love of my live, succumbed to cancer at 4:27am December 1st, 2022.
Knock out.
15 to 20 % of ovarian and peritoneum cancer is mis-diagnosed as the other. Those are just the ones that are documented.
Please give from your heart. Please help others to not suffer the same fate. Please donate to this gofundme, which will be donated to Foundation for Women Cancer (www.foundationforwomenscancer.org)
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