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Last last update, promise! I sent out the picture and review to everyone tonight. I couldn't post it here because there were drawings in it. I've gotten a few bounced back due to typos in people's emails, so message me if you didn't get it and you really need to read a review of a movie that isn't in theaters anymore. Everybody loves those! Sorry this dragged on so long! Thanks again, you beautiful b-holes!

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Guys, I finally finished all four viewings, just last night at Universal CityWalk, very near a Bubba Gump Shrimp Company and a dueling piano bar. It seemed fitting to finish up my viewing of one man's Hollywood fantasia inside a totally different Hollywood fantasia. Russian nesting fantasias! Anyway, it took me a lot longer than I thought to force myself to go four times, so the review will be in your inbox in a week or two, depending on how long it takes me to process all this with my team of therapists. Until then, you'll just have to be like Johnny Drama at the beginning of the movie, so giddy with anticipation about boarding a party yacht off the coast of Ibiza that you have to blurt out the immortal first line of the Entourage movie: "I may have to jerk it before we even get there."

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Hi jerks! Just a little housekeeping. Your very generous donations were just transferred over to CureSearch. You will see the amount on this page remain the same, because GoFundMe lists the amount raised regardless of withdrawals. CureSearch will definitely tweet that they got the $$$ so follow them @curesearch on Twitter if you like! I'm going to leave this page active for like a month for internet stragglers (a bunch more came in in the last 48 hours, so why not?), but I won't see Entourage more than four times. Like the title of that TV show said, "Four Is Enough." and now that I'm seeing it four times, my review may not be out for like three weeks because I'd like to review all four times I see it in one big review. Also after seein git four times I may need a "vacation" at a "mental asylum." CureSearch will also email you guys official receipts for your taxes. If that doesn't happen, please email me through this page and I'll let them know! Thanks. You are all the best/worst. XO Wendy

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THANK YOU!

I'm deactivating this page in about a few hours, and I am unsure whether I'll then be able to still see the emails to send a personal thank you to everyone. In case I can't, please accept the humblest of thank yous from me & my family. This got out of control in a great way and I couldn't keep up with contacting everyone to say thanks. Whether you were able to give five bucks or five hundred bucks, you did a good thing!

Thanks thanks thanks!

Wendy, Future Four Time Viewer of Entourage

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Hey fuckers. Well, just eight days ago, I was just like everyone else, a simple girl from Indiana who wanted the internet not to pay $10,000 dollars to make her go see Entourage. Back then, I was so innocent. I thought the internet was a charming place filled with kitten memes and strangers complimenting each other in comments sections, but now I know it is a hellish wasteland filled with dark-hearted sociopaths who think nothing of sending me to see Entourage two times just so they could satisfy their selfish ends of someday finding a cure for pediatric cancers. What a nightmare!

BUT I WILL NOT LET YOU BEAT ME! I am so ready to do this. My first viewing is Saturday and I am getting prepared. I'm exercising, drinking a lot of green juice, talking to my guru, and frantically googling "Change Identity Face and Body Boob Job Puerto Rico Housing Prices Extradition Policy." My Drama Mama pajamas have arrived, my Turtle cup is go, and I'm reading Eat Pray Love over and over again to see how a different lady handled the harrowing challenge of pampering herself on a round-the-world tour. She is probably the only person who ever had it worse than me.

Sure, I was going to be forced to see it four times if it reached 30K, but I'm so confident that won't happen that I personally just gave at the Ari Bronze level without fear. So, uh, joke's on you, tigers.

Before I disappear into the internet like so many sloths-taking-a-bath videos before me, a little housekeeping. If you gave at a Date With Wendy level or higher, you should have gotten an email from me with dates and times for screenings, so use the message function on the GoFundMe page to let me know if I somehow missed you. I'm seeing the movie Saturday and then again in two weeks, so look for the photo and review sometime just after that, provided I survive. This page will remain active til probably tomorrow morning, so LAST CHANCE to get me to four, monsters! After that these funds will appear over on a CureSearch Gold page in memory of Oliver Cross, and people can visit there if they want to think about ever giving more or learn more about Ollie or pediatric cancer research. You will see a discrepancy in the amount transferred over there because GoFundMe takes about 8% of total.

And lastly, a true thanks. You guys are just like Lloyd, no matter how many cell phones I threw at your faces, you just kept supporting this thing and raising money, and I couldn't hate you more for it. My nephew Oliver was a really funny kid. Sometimes unintentionally, like when he used to insist that Darth Vader was the good guy in Star Wars and that Wheat Thins were called Wheat Fins and came from the ocean, and sometimes intentionally - he was a real connoisseur of fine fart jokes. And really, isn't Entourage the finest fart joke of all? I was talking to my sister this morning and we both agreed that Oliver would have enjoyed the spirit of this thing if he was still with us, and I know he'd be super grateful knowing that this money will go towards making sure that other five year olds get to be out there running around having fun instead of in hospitals fighting cancer.

Someday, Lloyds, someday.

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Happy Entourage Eve Eve everybody! Only two shopping days left until the June 3rd premiere, and I know that whether you are a Drama Mama, a Vingina, a Shertle, an E-male, an Ari Gold-en Girl or a Lloyd Droid, your excitement is at fever pitch! I also know that if you are anything like me, you think that one of our culture's greatest villains is Kai Ryssdal of the NPR/APM show Marketplace. Through a series of escalating threats and provocations, I was duped into appearing on the show today to give a short interview about this enterprise and to talk a little about CureSearch. Obviously, this is a terrible outcome for me. As we creep towards 30K and the possibility of me seeing this movie four times, the last thing I need is for more soulless vampires who want to fight pediatric cancer to find out about this. So, I'm not saying that I'm swearing out a vengeance against Kai Ryssdal, I'm just saying that I'm glad he has two eyes because he will need to be sleeping with one eye open, and he should probably alternate eyes each night so he doesn't get dry eye.

And now here is a link to the statistics section on the CureSearch website so you can find out a little bit more about this cause. There are suprising statistics in here, like the fact that only 3 new drugs for childhood cancer have been approved in the last 20 years, and that one in eight kids diganosed with cancer will not survive. That is not funny at all. I think the phrase I'm looking for is "serious as Entourage." So check it out to see what you're helping with and other ways you can get involved. Until tomorrow, enemies!

http://curesearch.org/Childhood-Cancer-Statistics

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In the true spirit of Entourage, today's update is not very funny. I'm inviting you to head over to the CureSearch website and find out more about what they do and to feel good about yourselves for helping them in this amazing cause.

http://curesearch.org/About-Us

It's Saturday, and you deserve to give yourself a pat on the back for supporting this work!

And if anything's bringing you down today, just remember that thanks to all of you, I am now going to see Entourage in the theater TWICE. I know that you all are horrific sadists who enjoy that kind of thing so LAUGH IT UP.

And a few people have assumed that if by some chance this gets to 30K by June 3rd (the end of the world), I will see it three times. Incorrect. If this crazy thing gets to thirty, I'll see it FOUR times. Four. Anything to satisfy your bloodlust, creeps.

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Well, yesterday was a very terrible, gross day where all the generous monsters of the world decided it was a GREAT IDEA to not only make me see Entourage, but also to put me in Drama Mama Pajamas and make me carry a Turtle cup at the movies. And then, a very inhuman person at The Hollywood Reporter publicized this at the very moment that I hoped I would be spared from seeing this thing twice:

http://www.hollywoodreporter.com/news/bob-s-burgers-writer-raises-798775.

Disgusting. AND TURTLE HIMSELF, Jerry Ferrara, gave money for pediatric cancer research just to make sure that I had to go to this. I think we always knew there was an evil heart beating inside those sneakers. That's where the heart is, right? In the foot? I DON'T KNOW I AM NOT A DOCTOR. Anyway, thanks/fuck off, America. I need to go look into changing my identity and leaving the country to avoid this terrible fate. BUT BEFORE I DO, if you INSIST on continuing to donate to this cause, let me tell you a little bit about why it is important to my family:

In 2013, my beautiful, amazing, funny, smart nephew Oliver died from cancer. He is seen in this picture with his family on his preschool graduation day (he's the littlest one on the left in the blue shirt). Shortly after that picture was taken, Oliver got Leukemia, and faced an ordeal that no child should ever have to go through before losing his life at age 5. My sisterJenny and brother-in-law Brian are amazing parents who suffer terribly from this loss even though they've also shown amazing strength. Oliver's brothers miss him every day. I loved that little banana like crazy. CureSearch aggressively goes after cures EXCLUSIVELY for children's cancers, and that's why CureSearch will receive all this money in Oliver Cross's name. Oliver's parents chose this charity in the hope is that someday no child will have to go through the nightmare he endured. Of course, none of us anticipated that it would make this much money because we did not anticipate the dark, horrible generosity of your hearts, jerks.

So, now, DO WITH THAT INFORMATION WHAT YOU WILL. If I wind up seeing Entourage seventy-five times, then I leave you alone with your conscience, you sociopaths.

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Well, this has not worked out very well. Thanks to all of the terrible people I know and a bunch of awful strangers I've NEVER EVEN MET WHO CARE ABOUT CHILDREN'S CANCER, I've reached 10K in one day. If this madness continues, I am going to have to drink movie soda out of a Turtle sipper my effing sister made (if this hits 15K), AND if for some reason this goes on all the way to 20K I am going to have to see this movie twice. TWICE. This is a mess. All I know is this nightmare will end on June 3rd when Entourage premieres and the world as we know it ends. Screw all of you and your goddamned BIG HEARTS. You are the worst.