Adrian's Health

Adrian is diagnosed with ADHD, major depression, and sometimes-crippling anxiety.  Throw in some sensory issues and, sometimes, the smallest thing sends him into overwhelming rages he can't control.  When he comes down from them, he feels embarrased and ashamed.  In the midst of it, though, you can't do anything but step back and make sure he doesn't hurt himself.

This Saturday, he went into one of these rages and couldn't come down.  His body stopped listening; his emotions overwhelmed him; he screamed he would kill himself, and he tried to jump out of a moving car.  I dragged him into Children's ER, hoping there was some sort of help.  Any help.  

Adrian spent 2 days in an 8x8 windowless, white room in the ER because there was no hospital in the entire state of Minnesota with an inpatient child psych bed.  When told, after 2 days, that he couldn't go home, he flipped out worse than ever, and eight grown men and women strapped him down with restraints while he screamed.  They injected him with a med cocktail that included benzos and an anti-psychotic that can knock a grown man on his ass.  Adrian is 8.  A SMALL 8.   He passed out for 15 hours...and woke up in a pediatric ICU because, once again, there was NOWHERE in all of Minnesota to go for psychiatric help.  Nowhere.

After 3 days, Adrian finally got to an inpatient treatment facility for kids just like him, and the place is amazing.  He'll spend 8-10 days there at the least, doing therapy and building coping skills.  They have a sensory room and occupational therapy.  The hope is that he comes out with a toolbox of skills that will prevent the nightmare of this weekend from ever happening again.  He then goes into a partial hospitalization program for 4-6 weeks in which those skills are drilled in before he gets to go back to life as usual.


I'm elated that he's finally getting intensive help, but at the same time, niggling away at the back of my mind is the fact that this is going to be EXPENSIVE.   Mental illness can't be borne alone.  We have amazing friends and family to whom we're eternally grateful who have helped us manage this emotionally.  We do have insurance, but we're still responsible for a significant percentage of the tens of thousands this is going to cost.  So now we need help financially to help Adrian live a healthy, "normal" life.

Any little bit will help, but even if you're not inclined to donate (or unable to), there's still something you can do.  In honor of Adrian and Mental Health Awareness Month, call your government officials and tell them that mental health services are woefully underfunded and that you support having adequate psychiatric care available for those in crisis.  We need mental health services so that kids like mine don't become MORE traumatized by a system meant to help them. 

Oh, and next time you see Adrian, treat him like any other kid.  Know that, when he freaks or comes off a little rough, it's not because he's a jerk, or we're terrible parents, but because that's how his brain chemistry works.  He's a good kid; a brilliant kid; and funny as hell.  When this is all over, I'm hoping that part of him is what comes out of the ashes and all the rest of this can be left behind.