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Life for Venka

$4,510 of $50,000 goal

Raised by 49 people in 6 months
I had a stroke 11/16. I had Medicaid then through Contra Costa Health Plan. They screwed up. I moved to Alameda County, because I got uninvited from my friend and business partners house because they were "moving", and I was a sad sack that she couldn't handle. I was a trigger, though starting the business had been my idea and I encouraged her. She is still doing it. I would wish her well, but how I was treated leaves me so sad and hurt. She was like my little sister. I became an active Medicaid member in Alameda Alliance 9/1/2018. They put me on standard stroke protocol and I went to see a neurologist within the first 30 days. He referred me to UCSF Neurovascular Services within their Stroke Care, for diagnosis. November 1, 2018, 23 months after my stroke, with the use of my MRIs and CATscans from the day of the stroke in Contra Costa County , they diagnosed Vascular Lacunar Stroke, with a history of more than 6 Transient ischemic attacks leading up to the stroke. I have since been told I do not have vascular dementia. I am at high risk for another stroke and need to keep my stress level down. And my A1C and my cholesterol as well as my blood pressure. And one more thing. A doctor in Contra Costa claimed I had an eating disorder and needed mental health. I was throwing up, regurgitating food and had extremely bad acid reflux. My new endocrinologist did an endoscopy late January, and I have two ulcers that were biopsied and are not cancerous. I have pernicious anemia. It happens. There are other issues that Almeda Alliance is working on, like my incontinence and dizziness, but they are working on it, not just saying I need a shrink. They truly did screw up and put me through hell and I considered suicide more than once. And it wiped out what little money I had and put my property at risk that I had it in storage. I am out of cash, my car insurance went through as a GoFundMe donation came in. I have net $35 in my account. I have used my General Assistance for the month, and the last of my food stamps. It has been cold, wet, and rainy here, and now I am sick 2 days before my Social Security Appeal hearing, which I have a distinct feeling isn't going to go well. My lawyer doesn't seem to have my most current medical records from UCSF and Alameda. Just Contra Costa. I have filed against the 2 primary doctors with the Medical Board. I wrote the investigator today all the info from Alameda and how.he should get my records because there is the proof. And if UCSF says it, is there a reason to doubt it? Exactly. I have also been seeking an attorney to sue CCHP, because the MBC doesn't do Managed Care groups, just individual doctor's. And I'm not going to file a "grievance", because I received the care they wouldn't give me, but the neighboring County did. With the UCSF diagnosis and the endocrinologist, that's 2-for-2, and we're just getting started. This Social Security thing has me so worried, because even if I do get it, getting me housing is a separate issue. I'm 53, not 65, and I don't qualify for senior housing. There are people here who have beem homeless for 10, 15, 20 years and most of the cities act like there is no homeless issue. There is and I will be a vocal advocate for change and improvement. And with what I may win from CCC, I will start a non-profit and improve the lives of the homeless, like no more yoga mats to sleep on. Cots should be the rule, not the exception. Most homeless are in there 40's or older, have heart conditions, take medication, and many are alcoholics or drug addicts. Living on the street will change you. I know. My PTSD has gotten worse do to another friend locking me out of the house and threatening to do away with my property that they helped me move there. Did I tell you that there are no reliable services to find housing? If you have no money, you're SOL. That's me. Please help me. I can't sleep in my car anymore, spend what little I can get to rent a cheap hotel room. And my friend Will is with me as he is my emotional support, takes me to dr's appointments, is my eyes because my glasses are so old and cloudy, and I have retinopathy and they keep changing and hemorrhaging so I can't get a new eye glass prescription, and these glasses are 7 years old! Gawd do I want lasik. I have worn contacts since I was 16. I hate my glasses, and Will says my baby blues are hidden behind all the obstruction. He's right, as gay men usually are. Please help me. I have been a had various Corporate Finance roles, including Project Analyst on a $200M project in Pittsburg, CA, a Vice President of Loan Operations in Diablo Valley, and a Finance Director for a Green Mortgage Company. Since the stroke, I can't do basic 3rd grade math. I was a beta tester for Microsoft and I can't do formulas in Excel. I start to panic. I could handle everything and anything's before, now I can't handle two people speaking at once or raised voices or questions. It's scary. I need media and to get my story out there, because I can't be the only one. Help me stay alive. I beg of you.
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We are desperate, too much despair and NO HELP FROM THOSE WHO SHOULD.

Other than a volunteer from one church, who paid on his credit card, for one night at Motel 6, no other help has been available to us. We are out of cash, I'm out of cash, the guys are out of cash, Will and I still have some money on our Food Stamp accounts - but we cannot buy warm food. The government expects us to cook. Good luck if you're living in your car!

Please help us. Matt has a heart condition and edema AND he gets social security AND is still homeless. Will has prostrate cancer and spinal stenosis and has been on the waiting list for housing for OVER A YEAR, and I hopefully will get my SSI award on Wednesday, as if I haven't waited long enough because Conta Costa Health Plan completley screwed up. And Will and I have PTSD due to the shit we've been through taking care of Mom's with Alzheimers and NO HELP FROM ANYONE. ESPECIALLY FAMILY.

Friends have dismissed us. Made out lives more difficult or impossible. And what help have we had? Jack shit and nothing. Except for those blessed souls who have helped me, and by extension, Matt and Will because I live my life due to Gods Grace and I won't let those that hurt be hurt more. Or die.

Please help us. We aren't getting services through the City or County. The homeless situation here is atrocious, criminal even. People with disabilities and psychiatric disorders - the first get no help and the latter are tolerated because the Lord says they need help. If the latter is disruptive or dangerous to themselves or others they just need more of God's love to improve.

When they scare you to death, have threatened your life and property (or little dog), accused every last person of taking his pants, or blankets, or any little thing of the moment and he's an addict and has been banned from the "Creek" were all the merh-heads hang out - there is a problem, and it's not you.

It's the system. Our screwed up Country, government depleted, Republican ignorant bullshit, rape Medicare and Social Security to pay for Trump's stinking Wall or bankrupt the Country on behalf of White Supremacy. I'm tired and fed up with this Country swirling the bowl. I want my America back again, because this MAGA bullshit has to go. It's way too much like Hitler's Germany leading up to WWII.

Do you want to see internment camps with non-whites? Trump won't care if we create genocide against a particular shade, or religious group.

I'm sorry, but I am so angry. My friends, brothers from other mothers, are dying from lack of care and it is immoral! I do what I can, but what can I do except care for them and watch over them.

Help me help them. Please.
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Facebook is having issues and I can't post there today. Please help me...us. I need money for a hotel room. My friend Matt is having a memorial service for his mother at 5:30 March 13th and burning her Fay after tomorrow.

Being homeless and sleeping in the car isn't good for us. Matt has a heart condition and has edema. He could loose his feet if he doesn't elevate his feet and he's been shamed out of the Homeless Refuge here
Accusations of sexual impropriety and his snoring, which he is desperately trying to get a sleep apnea machine for.

And my friend Will who has spinal stenosis and prostrate cancer and his back is wrecked sleeping in the car, as opposed to a floor which doesn't help and he's supposedly a bad influence on me. I'm 53. He's 56. We're adults and he's Gay.

They are my emotional support. I have few enough of those left to me anymore. God bless those that still think I matter.

Please help us, help me.
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Further update:

I am managing to survive with less real concern of dying from cancer, but my support is from 2 individuals who are like brothers ( Will and Matt) and they have medical issues which has caused them Matt to be shamed out of the local homeless refuge and Will can't sleep on the floor due to the pain in his back which impacts him every minute when he doesn't sleep flat on an elevated surface.

And I simply can't get up off the floor without help getting up without wetting myself. Besides, the food isn't healthy for me as a diabetic. There rarely are vegetables and there never is fruit. Pasta is the preferred meal for the homeless at the Livermore Homeless Refuge. Yes, there are other places for the homeless, but they are in other cities and more than 20 miles away and first come first serve and hopefully not a long line and a "sorry, we just gave the last bed away" so you're sleeping in the car again.

It's work to try to find a place to sleep. Hard work when you have a Traumatic Brain Injury, and I'm the one with a car.

Please help. I need a safe place to stay without the madness of addicts, yelling if someone may have been perceived of having done something wrong through heresy, being included with being thrown out just because you're stranding there, or God forbid someone snores and can't get a sleep apnea machine. It's too much.

Motel 6 has been a good place to stay. Better than Springtown Inn, that's for damn sure. That place is disgusting and the some of the staff has issues.

Please help me/us. It won't go to waste. I plan to pay it forward and help as many people as I can when I can.
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A bit of an update....

I had an appointment with my gastroenterologist today. I had an endoscopy at the end of January and I was told I had 2 ulcers.

People with pernicious anemia are at greater risk of stomach cancer. I have had PA for over 20 years. I have to take monthly B12 injections, and if I get to low on B12, I have brain seizures. It's such a fun autoimmune disease. Not!

Endoscopy is a procedure that will be in my future, and colonoscopies. But my doctor took biopsies of the ulcer and the TEST WAS CLEAR. NO CANCER.

To say I'm relieved would be an understatement.

One scare behind me, still alot ahead.

I found out today I have to file a complaint against Contra Costa Health Plan through the Managed Care Board as the Medical Board only deals with individual doctors and they still haven't made a decision on the two nutjobs I had to deal with - not the rest who didn't give a flying f*ck.

More work for me.

I remain a fighter, but I have little help, other than God's Grace. We have been able to get a few hotel vouchers due to Matt's Mom dying last week. The memorial service is tomorrow and she will be buried alongside her husband on Friday. Matt needed a place to stay and we're with him, his emotional support and strength. I helped trim his beard tonight and went and picked him up some clothes that Matt would be comfortable in. He's a little bit bigger than St. Vincent dear Paul would usually carry. And he's not quite as tall as me. Mom would be happy that her baby boy looked nice and familiar at her service.

It was my pleasure Mary Jean. Anything for Matt-o.

Please help me. I still am waiting on my Social Security hearing next week, but it won't solve everything. I still have to get my storage unit out of hock. Not have them threatening me with auction every 3 months.

This wouldn't have happened if I had been diagnosed immediately and had received care - not 2 years later. And my attorney doesn't have my most recent records, just Contra Costa County. I may get screwed again.

And of course, I am homeless. How would you handle it? Better than me? I doubt it with everything that has happened. And I've been a VP of loan operations and a Director of Finance to name 2 titles I've had.

Oh how the mighty have fallen. But I walk in Grace with all I do and say. That has never changed. It was never about the money. It was could I sleep at night and those I worked for and with.
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$4,510 of $50,000 goal

Raised by 49 people in 6 months
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$200
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