HELP SAVE A LIFE DEVASTATED BY FINANCIAL ABUSE

We are writing on behalf of our mother, friend and trusted community member, Jeri.  We have
rallied around Jeri to  support her during this unthinkable time.  Thank you for reading her
story and helping to get her back on her fight while she attempts to thrive in this dire situation as
well as help change legislation.  Below is the story of Jeri and how you can help.

We are writing on behalf of our mother, friend and trusted community member, Jeri.  We have rallied around to  support  her during this unthinkable time, when the financial help of her mother was suddenly taken from her by a take over of Power of Attorney by her brother. Jeri was changing career, finding work in various hospitals, helping people in need, when her own support  was cut off.

With  more time she will find a job, get back on her feet  be able to pay the rent , buy food, and  get out of this dire situation . After her experience, learning  the legal system, she wants to work to change legislation. Jeri's promise, her mission: to  give back, to help others. 

Jeri's personal story shows us the impact of financial abuse. 

Our heartfelt thank you!


HELP SAVE A LIFE DEVASTATED BY FINANCIAL ABUSE

To watch Jeri at 71 years old, become the victim once more of Domestic Violence and Financial Abuse, this time perpetrated by her brother who resorted to come after her by taking control of and withholding her mother’s financial help is gut wrenching. It is heartbreaking to see her brother rob Jeri of her health, vitality, the relationship with her mother, her well-being, safety, security, apartment, car, work, life and energy to use all the gifts she has wanted to give to the world – to help others not suffer - to help others learn from her story and heal. Now, let us help her.

Jeri was in the middle of getting work hours in a new field, her mother helping her through this transition, when the following happened: 

-Jeri was relying on her mother to support her basic necessities (home, car, groceries). Jeri was reliant financially on her mother due to years of a medical malpractice case that impacted Jeri's health. Due to monthly surgeries and needing to recover after each one, her ability to work full-time was impacted.

-In 2016, Jeri was invited to move into her mother's home to get on her feet and heal. As Jeri's recovery continued, she began a post graduate training certification to refresh her skills and get back to work after a 50+ year career as a Language Speech Pathologist.

-A year later, Jeri’s mother helped her transition into a nearby apartment while continuing to help with car payments as Jeri continued her schooling. Then, a frightening day changed everything, Jeri’s mother suffered a stroke.   

-With time, love and caring, along with her children, rehabilitation center and others, she was able to go back home and continue recovering.  

-Shortly therafter, Jeri was called to her mother’s house, and to her great surprise, was greeted by a lawyer who made it clear, that as of that moment, her brother would be making all the medical and financial decisions.

-Jeri's brother had taken control of his mother, cut Jeri off and out of her mother’s life.  He had the locks changed. From that point on, there would be no financial support and the relationship with her mother would be no more.

-Jeri's days are now spent trying to find pro-bono lawyers to take on this matter, going to court, all while staying focused on her career.  At this juncture, the only money Jeri makes is by teaching at hospitals around NJ a few days a week. Jeri would've gotten a job with more time, but her brother took that away from her.  

-Jeri has just lost her car, in three weeks will lose her apartment, she is scraping by for food and medication and is in desperate need of help as this situation is dire.

All the funds raised through this campaign will be used for to pay rent to keep her apartment, put money towards finding a car that can take her to work and doctor appointments, basic necessities like food, medication and finding a lawyer who will take on her case for herself as well as others suffering at the hands of domestic violence and financial abuse.

Jeri would like to thank everyone at this time, your help is going to give Jeri the ability to move forward in life and help get back on my feet without living in constant fear every day. 

We encourage you to read the full story below for additional history and context.

Thank you for your kindness. Please know that Jeri plans to give back, to help others in a similar situation after she herself has learned the (legal) ropes. The help you give to Jeri will come back to others who need it.

Right now Jeri needs us. You are blessed for your caring. 

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JERI’S STORY: TOLD ON BEHALF OF HER DAUGHTER AND OLDEST FRIEND

FINANCIAL ABUSE

Jeri has taught us how insidious Financial Abuse is. She used to think the abuser was just greedy, yet, what is now clear is that the abuser is using the withholding of money as a weapon. To humiliate and kill the victim - at least kill the victim’s life - impacting credit, to keep the victim’s life in chaos, to negatively interfere in the victim’s relationships, and to kill the victim’s spirit. To keep the victim helpless, hopeless and powerless.

Jeri has of late experienced the humiliation of buying food with pennies saved, owing the local pharmacy or cleaners, accruing bills and getting calls from bill collectors because of her brother’s malicious acts.

BACK STORY

May 2016, Jeri’s mother invited her to move back in with her (back into her childhood home). Jeri, a respected Language Speech Pathologist, had to stop working temporarily while she went through surgeries selling her last asset to pay for procedures, and borrowing money from her mother to cover medical expenses. Jeri’s (and her mother’s) goal was for Jeri to be able to regain her strength, continue on pursuing her career goals and getting her back on her feet.

ALL WAS NOT RIGHT

The day she moved in, her brother was rageful toward her. She was taken by surprise -- over the months Jeri lived there, her brother began making threats toward her -- though Jeri tried reporting it to the police they said it was just “a family matter”.

MOVING OUT AND ATTEMPTING TO MOVE ON

Jeri was living with fear and anxiety at her mother’s house – between the daily intensity and the drama he was creating between Jeri and her mother, Jeri needed to get out – but she was having to go through two more unexpected surgeries and would need to get her stamina back.

Once ready, Jeri’s mother helped with a rental apartment and car for Jeri while continuing to help pay for living and daily expenses. Jeri began to get life back on track when her mother suffered a severe stroke due to improper care and medical advice.  This devastating experience did bring the family together and through love, care and rehabilitation, her mother was able to come home to continue her healing.

Once home, things started to take a turn and the family became ripped apart … her brother was keeping Jeri away from her mother, he was not taking the medical advice that was given and eventually he brought in a lawyer to come after Jeri in August 2017. The behavior now started to make sense.

THEN OUT OF NOWHERE

On a summer day in 2017, Jeri was asked to her mother’s house and to her surprise, she walked in to find an attorney sitting at the kitchen table who made it clear that as of that moment, her brother would be making all medical and financial.

NO LONGER ALLOWED A RELATIONSHIP WITH HER MOTHER

And that is when it came to light that her brother had taken power of attorney secretly in 2015. Immediately, he took control, she seemed and acted like she was sedated, fired competent caretakers who questioned the medication she was being prescribed. Because he impacted the little savings Jeri had and withheld her mother’s help, Jeri was powerless to find a lawyer to help. Jeri was no longer welcomed back at her mother’s house and the locks were all changed.

TAKING ACTION

Jeri spent endless days speaking to the police, the Bergen County Surrogate, local agencies for seniors, domestic violence organizations, adult protective services, seeing an Elder Abuse Attorney calling Bar Associations, Alternatives to Domestic Violence, Mental Health Law Projects, NE Legal Services to no avail. Money talks and her brother hiring and firing lawyers to protect him and continue to stage her mother’s home.

ATTEMPTING TO BALANCE LIFE AND A CAREER

And from there on, the effects of distress, Jeri was still only working one day/week as she had to continue to take actions advised by State Adult Protective Services to take care of herself first- demand to file a police report and then try to get a restraining order vs her brother -- report those threats and all the forms of abuse toward her including how he impacted her credit causing her to lose a plum job.

Withholding monies vs her mother’s wishes, he continued to falsely shift the blame to her hiring lawyers to do his bidding, Jeri kept seeking help- speaking to lawyers.

WHERE WE ARE TODAY

That did it, Jeri crumbled and ended up with pneumonia- then rebounded to get more working hours. Three weeks ago, her car was taken away because of her brother, Jeri will lose her apartment in three weeks unless we find the funds for her to pay rent. Without a car, Jeri is unable to travel around to get to jobs around various hospitals. We need to help Jeri get back on her feet so she can pay for the above basic necessities plus food, medication and utilities.

Jeri lives in daily sadness, fear and has been in despair suffering secretly in silence and sometimes sharing her fears and frustrations with her closest friends and clergy – who  advised her to take the action start a GoFundMe me page to empower her so she can use her resiliency and hope to help countless others recover from abuse and to make law enforcement judges lawyers and legislators aware that changes must be made. Jeri can be that change maker if you can help her.

LOOKING TOWARDS THE FUTURE WITH YOUR HELP

Jeri's already suffered childhood abuse, has PSTD, and we believe because of it, has so much love to give. She wants to be able to help others.  

A highly educated respected, allied medical professional with so much love and devotion, found a calling to help others not suffer, being an advocate and making changes that count, but as a victim of repeated abuse, her recovery is hampered. Let’s help her so she can help others, she will, and she can. She can rise again but not alone….

This is not easy for Jeri, her children, her friends to put this information out there, but it’s the following words that provides courage:

“Be strong enough to stand alone. Be smart enough to know when you need help. Be brave enough to ask for it.”

-Thank You from Jeri, her children and friends