Anne Honer - going back to Hospital
I started dating Anne a little over four years ago after I was introduced to her by a mutual friend. Three months after meeting Anne she had a surgery that resulted in the unforeseen and unfortunate side effect of daily migraine headaches, severe enough to put most people in bed. Not Anne Honer. That was September 20, 2011.
Every day through the pain of migraines over the past four years she has gotten up, cared for her son, and advanced her life by always holding her highest position, regardless of her personal pain. I have accompanied her to hundreds of medical visits in attempting to resolve the headaches, all with limited success. Through this period she has had very little help from anyone because it is not in her nature to ask for help. It is not pride but rather her natural tendency towards self-reliance that drives her. Every day she gets up, prevails through the pain and touches lives in positive ways through her work. Most of us are not even aware of the pain she humbly endures while fulfilling her many daily responsibilities.
In August of this year she began to finally have migraine-free days. What a joy to see a bit of light at the end of such a dark and painful phase! For a much-needed and well-deserved break I took Anne to a wedding in Florida on September 3rd. Our first night there she began experiencing severe pain in her abdomen. Those that know Anne know she does not complain or express her discomfort. She asked me to call an ambulance rather than take her myself to the ER; she was already that ill. The ambulance arrived at 2:22 am, and by 8:35 am the surgeon finally returned to explain the emergency surgery they had just completed. Her lower intestine and colon had ruptured, causing significant internal problems that at the time they felt they had repaired. She recuperated in the hospital for seven more days and then a day more at the hotel in Florida. She returned home on September 12th. She appeared to be doing fine and then we experienced another emergency setback.
On September 18th she was again rushed to the hospital. They took images that were reviewed by three very competent doctors, but no signs of intestinal leakage were detected. Obviously there were issues that needed to be resolved immediately. The following day she was going into shock and was rushed back into surgery. It was much worse than any of us expected; and was then approaching a very grave health crisis. She had three locations internally that were discharging the contents of her colon and intestines into her abdominal cavity. She was in surgery on the 19th for three hours and another three and-a-half hours the following day. She was on a ventilator until Sunday and remained in the ICU until today, September 24th. She is expected to be in the hospital for another week and then will transition to a focused rehabilitation and therapeutic assisted-living facility until she is well enough to return home. She will not be able to work for about three months assuming all goes well. This is a long time for a single mother with a mortgage to be unable to work.
Anne is a financially cautious person with no debt; her house payment and recurring bills total approximately $3000 monthly. Many of you are aware that this is a very conservative budget for a household in Alaska. My goal for this effort is to raise $9,000 to cover her expenses and mortgage for three months. We are doing other things to help Anne and it is our sincere hope those of you who know her will also contribute what you are able to.
So many of you who are aware and involved in her recovery and care have asked how you may help. I have composed a list of tangible things you can contribute and ways to help our dear Anne in her crisis situation right now.
1) Help Anne financially through this effort.
2) Pray for her quick and complete recovery.
3) Share this request through Facebook and other social networking sites as appropriate.
4) Smile every time you look into another soul's eyes and think of Anne so her light joins yours. The best way to honor her now is to share the joy that Anne has always given each of us.
Thank you all for helping.
Anne did great!!! She was in surgery for four hours. Recovery was a bit longer than expected. She had the same anesthesiologist as September and she could not believe Anne was the same person. They are not used to seeing someone walk back in after what Anne experienced in the fall. She is a walking, living miracle.
They did not attempt robotics because there were other issues that needed to be addressed that required the surgeon to open her up again. The pain management is way better than before and she looks great and her spirits were much better after surgery.
So it looks like her stay will be about five days in the hospital assuming everything goes well the next couple days.
I was waiting in her room for her after recovery and the nurses that were expecting her on that floor had already heard about Anne. I said to her night nurse, “you are really going to like Anne.” And her reply, “we already have heard about her that she is really sweet and an amazing person"…so even in her “dark night” she shines through. This is Anne.
She will be a few weeks before she can drive again and a few months to get her strength back but she is on her way to a final recovery. There remain some risks of hernias going forward but these are things that can be fixed and is not the life threatening situation of the last year. It has been a long journey since September.
I increased her “gofundme” goal from the fall to help her through this final period of recovery so if you can help or pass this on that would be great.
Thank you again for all of your loving support, prayers and good wishes on behalf of Anne.
Bless you all in a thousand ways!
Thank you again for all of your help and support for Anne. This is intended to update everyone on what is happening with her.
Her strength and weight is back and as she says, “I finally got my butt back.” She is her emotionally strong and delightful self but a bit apprehensive going back in again after her last round of surgery. It has been a longer hall than we expected but, finally, she is going in for her follow-up. The plan is to put her back together so that she can function normally again.
They are going to try and do this robotically but there is a high likelihood that they will have to cut her back open in order to get to everything that needs to be done corrected. We are hopeful that the robotic method will work because it will reduce the recovery time substantially. The expectation is that with robotics she will recover in six to eight weeks verses four to six more months. In any case we are hopeful that it is quick, smooth and that there are no complications. She goes in in the early morning of the 19th of April at Regional Hospital here in Anchorage and is expected to be in the hospital three to seven days.
Anne’s son Jacob will be with his dad or me while Anne is recovering. I am not traveling until late in June so will be with Anne throughout her early, more difficult part of her recovery.
Again thank you all for your prayers and support for Anne during this very difficult last year. If you get the opportunity to send her a note or give her a call before she goes in, I know that she would appreciate it.
It has been awhile since I sent out an update on Anne and we wanted to let you know what has happened since the surgery.
She was discharged from the hospital October 23rd after a total of five weeks in serious recovery from her ruptured intestines. She came out of the hospital at about 106 lbs and has been steadily building her weight and strength. By mid November she was able to abandon her “walker” increasing her confidence. She is walking a total of a little over a mile a day now using a meter for tracking her progress by aggregating her daily movements. This last weekend she was even sledding with our children, although she really felt it the next day. She started driving again a few weeks ago as well. Some days remain difficult but all of us know Anne she is a very strong and determined person. All of her doctors are amazed at how well she looks and is progressing.
I have been with Anne a little less than five years and am honored to walk with her in the world. Her migraines started about four months into our relationship and she continues to walk through that challenge. I have been with her through the latest health issues. I know a great number of people and few, that I know, could endure the walk through “the dark night of the soul” with such grace, love and beauty as has Anne. She is truly an incredible person surrounded by, and connected to so many good people such as you. Thank you again for standing by her through these challenges.
She was expecting to have been put back together by know and would be back to work. But this is not going to happen soon. The surgeon is at this point planning to do a robotic surgery to put her intestines back together and remove the external bypass. He is going to try and avoid a more radical opening of her abdomen if possible that will aid her in the speed of her recovery. If all goes well she will be able to start to work part-time again in June or July is there are no complications and she gains the strength she needs. Every thing is very positive in this regard it is just taking significantly longer that we expected. This is the most difficult part of all of this for Anne she does not like being unable to do ANYTHING…but she is learning to be patient with herself. As you can imagine this has been a transformative event for her and, to a lesser extent, all of us who have been with her.
As a part of my professional life I lecture on various topics around the world. Last year prior to Anne’s health issues I accepted an invitation to present two lectures on a cruise ship in Mexico and California. I accepted the invitation only on condition that my sponsor also full pay for Anne to accompany me, which they readily agreed to. So, in a few hours, we are leaving for ten days of adventure and rest for Anne and a little work in between for me. I think the change of environment for a few days will be good for Anne right now so I am really pleased that this could happen for her before the next round of medical procedures.
All of that to really just say thank you, thank you for all of your encouragement and help over the last five months. Blessing to you all!
Hi Nicholas and Anne. Thank you so much for the update, I have been wondering how Anne is doing. Please feel free to call (907)441-6075, if there's anything I can do to help. Food, errands, company, Bodywork :-) lots of love and light to you both...hang in there