Marya & Scott's Surrogacy
Donation protected
My name is Denise Parker, sister to Marya Sutton. I can tell you that Marya and I have not always seen eye to eye growing up. As time went on and as we grew older, life was put into perspective and we got closer than ever. When trials and obstacles are thrown our way and the only two options are to fight or give up, Marya will FIGHT. I am starting a GoFundMe page to help Marya & Scott raise money to have a surrogate carry their baby.
Here is the short version of Marya and Scott's story:
Marya and Scott found out that they were pregnant with their first baby in December 2014. We all knew that Marya and Scott would be amazing parents, as they were with my first daughter, Serenity. They had so much love to give, we knew their baby would be unconditionally loved. Later, they found out they were having a girl!
During this wonderful period, Marya found a lump in her left breast. February 2015, she was diagnosed with Stage III breast cancer at the age of 33. Her heart sank not knowing the outcome of her unborn baby. Emotions we can only empathize with. Doctors were hopeful that she could go through chemo and keep her baby. Turns out that since the tumor was estrogen driven, the pregnancy made the tumor grow progressively and doubled in size after a month.
She was given three choices; (1) Keep the baby but not live long enough to raise her and watch her grow. (2) Let go of her baby and have a future to try again. Or (3) Do a less aggressive treatment and possibly lose them both. It was a tough decision, but she fought to take care of herself and try again when she was able to.
March 2015, she had to let her girl go. Cancer treatment started three days after, which gave her no time at all to grieve for her little girl. They were told that after two years of being clean, they can try again.
Marya's last treatment was March 2016. She went through tough times having opted to have a double mastectomy with reconstruction to eliminate any chances of it coming back. Six months after the last treatment, she found another lump. This pushed her dreams of being a mother further from reach.
They went to see a fertility doctor. After going through 2-3 daily injections for weeks and every other day of bloodwork done to check her hormone levels. When the eggs were a good size, they were ready for extraction. They were thankful that they were able to extract any eggs at all.
In October 2016, she went into surgery again to remove the small tumors - this included 22 lymph nodes and a small part of her chest muscle.
Mid-November 2016, she started chemo again. Four chemo treatments later, her last chemo treatment was 1/19/2017. Then on to radiation for 6 1/2 weeks and after that, hormone treatment via IV for at least six months.
With all that she went through, it was medically advised that with the type of cancer she had, it was safer for her to not carry her own baby. She wanted to be able to experience pre-birth stages, but that experience does not trump her wanting to be a mother.
My sister is a fighter. She wants nothing more than to have a baby of her own and to give her husband a child. While I say that Marya is a fighter, she wouldn't have been able to go through all that without the love and support of her husband, Scott. He fought for the both of them, when he knew she couldn't at times. We are all so thankful for having him care and love her the way he has and how he continues to everyday. No doubt that love will be extended to their baby.
Writing this story, gives hope that there is light at the end of the tunnel. Marya is now four years cancer free and ready to start another journey as a mother.
Thank you for taking the time to read Marya and Scott's story. As I read/write with tears rolling down my cheeks, I want to extend our gratitude for any contribution - NO AMOUNT IS TOO LITTLE. Anything will help them reach their goal. We love and appreciate you all!
Here is the full story written by Marya:
On December 26, 2014, I found out I was pregnant. What a joyful surprise the day after Christmas. We couldn’t believe it. We were so excited and shocked that we just stood there and stared at each other in silence and disbelief that this moment had finally come. This was our long awaited first child and we were more than stoked. Our first baby appointment was scheduled for the end of January 2015. The appointment went well, everything looked healthy. We asked the physician’s assistant about a lump on my left breast that I had felt the past couple months but thought nothing of it. She decided that when we went in for our first ultrasound that I also get an ultrasound of the area where the lump was. Soon after, my OBGYN recommended I get a biopsy to be on the safe side. February 2015, I was diagnosed with Stage III breast cancer at the age of 33. I was alone in my car leaving an acupuncture appointment when I found out. My whole life flipped upside down. I wept like a baby and could not contain myself. How could such a wonderful miracle and the most monstrous news happen at the same time? Two days later, I was rushed to see an oncology surgeon, a radiologist, and an oncologist all on the same day. It was the most exhausting and emotional Friday I had ever experienced.
My doctors were hopeful that I could go through chemo while being able to keep my baby. By my second trimester when the results came back from the MRI it showed that my tumor had doubled in size in one month compared to the original ultrasound. It was starting to attach to my small chest muscle. My team of doctors decided it was best to do chemo first to shrink the size and then perform surgery. The tumor was progressively growing at a much faster rate since I was pregnant. The tumor was estrogen driven. By this time, we found out that it was a 60-70% chance that our baby was going to be a girl, which is what we still believe. We prayed and kept our fingers crossed we would be able to keep her. We did not want to lose our first child. At our appointment, we were provided with the results and the options. Due to the rapid rate of my growing tumor, they needed to treat me aggressively with chemicals that were not safe for the baby. I had three choices; 1. Keep the baby but not live long enough to raise her and watch her grow. 2. Let go of her and have a future to try again. Or 3. Do a less aggressive treatment and possible lose us both. I knew what I had to do, but I could not even fathom having the thought of letting her go. When our oncologist surgeon gave us the options, she held on to both our hands and cried with us. My heart shattered in a million pieces every time I thought about it. We were told that after two years of being clean, we can try again. This was our drive to fight this thing with all our might. After receiving this news, our family gave us a priceless gift, our first puppy, Princess Leia. Leia has helped us in so many ways and she has been an irreplaceable addition to our family.
In March 2015, the day came to let go of my girl. Cancer treatment started 3 days after. I spent many days confused on why this happened to me and wondered if I was being punished somehow. I spent days lying in bed, sick to my very core, helpless and at the mercy of others. There were days where the bone pain left me in agony. I remember spending so many days being irrationally sad, angry, and just crying all the time. It was all so uncontrollable. I felt emotionally and physically weak all at the same time. There were times when I blamed myself. I thought about our daughter and realized that because of her, I was still alive. She was, and still is, my angel.
I completed six chemo treatments and the last treatment was in July 2015. I still had to continue with estrogen treatment via IV until March 2016. I had an MRI and an MRI biopsy late August 2015. Results revealed no tumor detected. Yes!! My surgeon recommended a lumpectomy, but with the information and statistics I was provided, I opted to have a double mastectomy with reconstruction. I wanted to give myself the best chance of it not coming back and because of this I let a part of my womanhood go. Like I say, cancer robs you of a lot but you get to keep your life. The day of surgery was a big day. It was the day I lost a part of me forever that I will never get back. I saw the solemn and scared look on Scott’s face and reassured him that I would be okay even though I was scared shitless inside. Six hours later I woke up not feeling much. I was so drugged up. The expanders my plastic surgeon put in me were excruciatingly painful and uncomfortable during the following weeks. We did get good news the day after surgery, all my margins were clean as well as my lymph nodes.
I was in remission! I let my body heal and continued to move forward with life.
Exactly six months after March 2016, my last treatment, I felt a lump…I panicked right away. This can’t be happening again!!! In September 2016, I was diagnosed for the 2nd time with breast cancer. The beast came back to test how much I want to live this life. Words could not express how I felt that day. My poor husband, in the same room with me, went white. And my poor family had to go through this again. I was so angry with myself but the alternatives were to fight or no longer live; and I was not ready to leave this life yet.
First thing first, we got in to see a fertility doctor. We went through a rigorous treatment of 2-3 daily injections for weeks and every other day of bloodwork done to check my hormone levels. When the eggs were a good size, they were ready for extraction. Ten were extracted, nine were in the stages of maturing and four embryos were completely matured. We were so thrilled because we were told of an anticipated lower number of embryos and that we would be lucky to get one mature embryo.
In October 2016, I went into surgery again to remove the small tumors. I was told I had a radical procedure done because 22 lymph nodes were removed along with a small portion of my small chest muscle which left me dealing with lymphedema the rest of my life. Almost a week passed and we had not heard any news about my results. We were all getting very antsy and took it as a bad sign. When we finally heard back, it was great news, everything was clean, clear and negative.
In mid-November 2016, I started chemo treatment. There would be a total of 4 treatments. This time around, I was more emotional than ever and even more irrational. I no longer trusted my body to have the ability to heal myself. My last chemo treatment was on 1/19/2017 and I now face a different beast, radiation treatment for 6 ½ weeks and hormone treatment via IV for at least six months.
After being diagnosed twice, I see life much differently. I appreciate how precious our bodies and health really are. I have had the best support from my family and friends. Stressing about the things we can’t control is wasting today of living. Life always takes you on different roads whether you expect it or not, and that’s why learning to be flexible with your goals is so important. Never lose sight of your goals but be flexible with your journey. Trust me, I have my bad days but I try to let it go and accept it because I know it won’t last forever. Staying strong and positive is the key to fighting this evil. Not only is it me going through all this, but my best friend, my husband, is fighting with me. I know in my heart he will never leave my side no matter how hard and difficult things get.
I plan on taking care of myself and learning to trust my body again. It will not be an easy journey but with the help of my devoted husband, supportive family/friends and unconditional love from our Princess Leia, I will learn to love myself again. I also plan on going back to school to become nurse, and start a foundation to help others that are going through cancer.
I want to find a way to give back to help those who are going through the physical and mental turmoil of dealing with cancer.
I am now 4 years cancer free and ready to add to my family and try again with a child. There were many aspects in my life that helped me heal throughout the years: family, working at a Child Development Center and being around amazing children, all the time was a gift.
Based on the type of cancer I had, it is safer for me to not carry my own child. Therefore, we reached a tough decision. We decided it was best to go with surrogacy.
Here is the short version of Marya and Scott's story:
Marya and Scott found out that they were pregnant with their first baby in December 2014. We all knew that Marya and Scott would be amazing parents, as they were with my first daughter, Serenity. They had so much love to give, we knew their baby would be unconditionally loved. Later, they found out they were having a girl!
During this wonderful period, Marya found a lump in her left breast. February 2015, she was diagnosed with Stage III breast cancer at the age of 33. Her heart sank not knowing the outcome of her unborn baby. Emotions we can only empathize with. Doctors were hopeful that she could go through chemo and keep her baby. Turns out that since the tumor was estrogen driven, the pregnancy made the tumor grow progressively and doubled in size after a month.
She was given three choices; (1) Keep the baby but not live long enough to raise her and watch her grow. (2) Let go of her baby and have a future to try again. Or (3) Do a less aggressive treatment and possibly lose them both. It was a tough decision, but she fought to take care of herself and try again when she was able to.
March 2015, she had to let her girl go. Cancer treatment started three days after, which gave her no time at all to grieve for her little girl. They were told that after two years of being clean, they can try again.
Marya's last treatment was March 2016. She went through tough times having opted to have a double mastectomy with reconstruction to eliminate any chances of it coming back. Six months after the last treatment, she found another lump. This pushed her dreams of being a mother further from reach.
They went to see a fertility doctor. After going through 2-3 daily injections for weeks and every other day of bloodwork done to check her hormone levels. When the eggs were a good size, they were ready for extraction. They were thankful that they were able to extract any eggs at all.
In October 2016, she went into surgery again to remove the small tumors - this included 22 lymph nodes and a small part of her chest muscle.
Mid-November 2016, she started chemo again. Four chemo treatments later, her last chemo treatment was 1/19/2017. Then on to radiation for 6 1/2 weeks and after that, hormone treatment via IV for at least six months.
With all that she went through, it was medically advised that with the type of cancer she had, it was safer for her to not carry her own baby. She wanted to be able to experience pre-birth stages, but that experience does not trump her wanting to be a mother.
My sister is a fighter. She wants nothing more than to have a baby of her own and to give her husband a child. While I say that Marya is a fighter, she wouldn't have been able to go through all that without the love and support of her husband, Scott. He fought for the both of them, when he knew she couldn't at times. We are all so thankful for having him care and love her the way he has and how he continues to everyday. No doubt that love will be extended to their baby.
Writing this story, gives hope that there is light at the end of the tunnel. Marya is now four years cancer free and ready to start another journey as a mother.
Thank you for taking the time to read Marya and Scott's story. As I read/write with tears rolling down my cheeks, I want to extend our gratitude for any contribution - NO AMOUNT IS TOO LITTLE. Anything will help them reach their goal. We love and appreciate you all!
Here is the full story written by Marya:
On December 26, 2014, I found out I was pregnant. What a joyful surprise the day after Christmas. We couldn’t believe it. We were so excited and shocked that we just stood there and stared at each other in silence and disbelief that this moment had finally come. This was our long awaited first child and we were more than stoked. Our first baby appointment was scheduled for the end of January 2015. The appointment went well, everything looked healthy. We asked the physician’s assistant about a lump on my left breast that I had felt the past couple months but thought nothing of it. She decided that when we went in for our first ultrasound that I also get an ultrasound of the area where the lump was. Soon after, my OBGYN recommended I get a biopsy to be on the safe side. February 2015, I was diagnosed with Stage III breast cancer at the age of 33. I was alone in my car leaving an acupuncture appointment when I found out. My whole life flipped upside down. I wept like a baby and could not contain myself. How could such a wonderful miracle and the most monstrous news happen at the same time? Two days later, I was rushed to see an oncology surgeon, a radiologist, and an oncologist all on the same day. It was the most exhausting and emotional Friday I had ever experienced.
My doctors were hopeful that I could go through chemo while being able to keep my baby. By my second trimester when the results came back from the MRI it showed that my tumor had doubled in size in one month compared to the original ultrasound. It was starting to attach to my small chest muscle. My team of doctors decided it was best to do chemo first to shrink the size and then perform surgery. The tumor was progressively growing at a much faster rate since I was pregnant. The tumor was estrogen driven. By this time, we found out that it was a 60-70% chance that our baby was going to be a girl, which is what we still believe. We prayed and kept our fingers crossed we would be able to keep her. We did not want to lose our first child. At our appointment, we were provided with the results and the options. Due to the rapid rate of my growing tumor, they needed to treat me aggressively with chemicals that were not safe for the baby. I had three choices; 1. Keep the baby but not live long enough to raise her and watch her grow. 2. Let go of her and have a future to try again. Or 3. Do a less aggressive treatment and possible lose us both. I knew what I had to do, but I could not even fathom having the thought of letting her go. When our oncologist surgeon gave us the options, she held on to both our hands and cried with us. My heart shattered in a million pieces every time I thought about it. We were told that after two years of being clean, we can try again. This was our drive to fight this thing with all our might. After receiving this news, our family gave us a priceless gift, our first puppy, Princess Leia. Leia has helped us in so many ways and she has been an irreplaceable addition to our family.
In March 2015, the day came to let go of my girl. Cancer treatment started 3 days after. I spent many days confused on why this happened to me and wondered if I was being punished somehow. I spent days lying in bed, sick to my very core, helpless and at the mercy of others. There were days where the bone pain left me in agony. I remember spending so many days being irrationally sad, angry, and just crying all the time. It was all so uncontrollable. I felt emotionally and physically weak all at the same time. There were times when I blamed myself. I thought about our daughter and realized that because of her, I was still alive. She was, and still is, my angel.
I completed six chemo treatments and the last treatment was in July 2015. I still had to continue with estrogen treatment via IV until March 2016. I had an MRI and an MRI biopsy late August 2015. Results revealed no tumor detected. Yes!! My surgeon recommended a lumpectomy, but with the information and statistics I was provided, I opted to have a double mastectomy with reconstruction. I wanted to give myself the best chance of it not coming back and because of this I let a part of my womanhood go. Like I say, cancer robs you of a lot but you get to keep your life. The day of surgery was a big day. It was the day I lost a part of me forever that I will never get back. I saw the solemn and scared look on Scott’s face and reassured him that I would be okay even though I was scared shitless inside. Six hours later I woke up not feeling much. I was so drugged up. The expanders my plastic surgeon put in me were excruciatingly painful and uncomfortable during the following weeks. We did get good news the day after surgery, all my margins were clean as well as my lymph nodes.
I was in remission! I let my body heal and continued to move forward with life.
Exactly six months after March 2016, my last treatment, I felt a lump…I panicked right away. This can’t be happening again!!! In September 2016, I was diagnosed for the 2nd time with breast cancer. The beast came back to test how much I want to live this life. Words could not express how I felt that day. My poor husband, in the same room with me, went white. And my poor family had to go through this again. I was so angry with myself but the alternatives were to fight or no longer live; and I was not ready to leave this life yet.
First thing first, we got in to see a fertility doctor. We went through a rigorous treatment of 2-3 daily injections for weeks and every other day of bloodwork done to check my hormone levels. When the eggs were a good size, they were ready for extraction. Ten were extracted, nine were in the stages of maturing and four embryos were completely matured. We were so thrilled because we were told of an anticipated lower number of embryos and that we would be lucky to get one mature embryo.
In October 2016, I went into surgery again to remove the small tumors. I was told I had a radical procedure done because 22 lymph nodes were removed along with a small portion of my small chest muscle which left me dealing with lymphedema the rest of my life. Almost a week passed and we had not heard any news about my results. We were all getting very antsy and took it as a bad sign. When we finally heard back, it was great news, everything was clean, clear and negative.
In mid-November 2016, I started chemo treatment. There would be a total of 4 treatments. This time around, I was more emotional than ever and even more irrational. I no longer trusted my body to have the ability to heal myself. My last chemo treatment was on 1/19/2017 and I now face a different beast, radiation treatment for 6 ½ weeks and hormone treatment via IV for at least six months.
After being diagnosed twice, I see life much differently. I appreciate how precious our bodies and health really are. I have had the best support from my family and friends. Stressing about the things we can’t control is wasting today of living. Life always takes you on different roads whether you expect it or not, and that’s why learning to be flexible with your goals is so important. Never lose sight of your goals but be flexible with your journey. Trust me, I have my bad days but I try to let it go and accept it because I know it won’t last forever. Staying strong and positive is the key to fighting this evil. Not only is it me going through all this, but my best friend, my husband, is fighting with me. I know in my heart he will never leave my side no matter how hard and difficult things get.
I plan on taking care of myself and learning to trust my body again. It will not be an easy journey but with the help of my devoted husband, supportive family/friends and unconditional love from our Princess Leia, I will learn to love myself again. I also plan on going back to school to become nurse, and start a foundation to help others that are going through cancer.
I want to find a way to give back to help those who are going through the physical and mental turmoil of dealing with cancer.
I am now 4 years cancer free and ready to add to my family and try again with a child. There were many aspects in my life that helped me heal throughout the years: family, working at a Child Development Center and being around amazing children, all the time was a gift.
Based on the type of cancer I had, it is safer for me to not carry my own child. Therefore, we reached a tough decision. We decided it was best to go with surrogacy.
Organizer
Denise Parker
Organizer
Chula Vista, CA