In memory of my wonderful dad, Justin Gray
Donation protected
Hi, my name is Nick Gray, and this week I lost the most important man in my life.
My dad, Justin Gray aged 42, passed away unexpectedly from heart failure on
January 23, 2019. My entire world forever changed that day.
He was an amazing man- funny, kind hearted, and completely selfless. He was a wonderful cook, a loving husband and a great dad. He always put his family first, especially me and my two younger sisters, Malaya (16) and Halayna (11).
Even though he was a hard worker, we always struggled financially. Sometimes he would go without his heart medication just so that we could have what we needed. I hate that he had to choose...
We moved into a new house just a few days before he passed away. Things felt like they were finally going to improve.
And then everything changed.
A week ago, we were excited to be setting up our new beds and have rooms of our own. And now, here I am, reaching out to people I may never meet, sharing the most personal story and devastating moment of my life.
I’m not sure quite how to do this. I have never been through anything quite like this, and my dad isn’t here to help me out. I don’t usually ask for anything, and I’m not quite sure how to, so please bear with me as I share.
My dad worked as a corrections officer at the Juvenile Detention Center here in Marion Ohio. That gave him the opportunity to meet and influence kids who, more often than not, never had a dad or a proper male role model in their life.
He used to talk to the kids there, joke with them, treat them like they were just kids, not “delinquents”. He was good for them. And they looked up to him with the utmost respect. He showed them what a good man was like. And since his passing, so many of those kids are reaching out to us, offering their condolences. We are astonished. They really loved him, but more than that, they respected him and the way he saw them. Everyone loved him. He just had a way of making you feel safe, comfortable, cared for, and important in this world.
I’ll miss that always.
Everything my dad did, he did it in constant pain. Between back injuries, surgeries and a heart condition, he couldn’t walk, bend, lift, or breathe without feeling exhausted. But he always pushed through; trying to provide for us, going to all of our school events, being there when we needed him, making us as happy as he possibly could.
He worked so hard, most times six days a week (3rd shift), not ever getting enough sleep. Financial stress and anxiety contributed to his depression and failing health. And still, there was never enough money. It didn’t seem that there was a way we could have saved for the unimaginable and the “just in case” events of life.
Since my dad has passed on, I am the sole provider of my family as of now. I am 21 years old and faced with a whole new reality, and it’s really scary. I work at Office Depot and I go to college when time and money allow. I am not prepared for what lies ahead. I don’t know how I am going to do it all.... take care of my family the way my dad did.
My dad was so proud, he wouldn’t ask for help. Unfortunately, I feel I need to. I believe there is a time to give and a time to receive. We are in need of receiving help right now.
My family has an immediate need of money for my dad’s funeral. Also, we moved into a rental property that had no refrigerator or stove. We found a stove through a family friend, and another friend is letting us borrow a small, dorm size refrigerator. But it’s not big enough for a family. My dad was planning on trying to get one soon, when we had enough money. I think we can get a new one for about $700 if we shop smart.
We need money for February’s rent. We will likely have to move because I can’t afford this place on just my income alone.
It’s going to be hard enough without my dad- to be here to laugh with us, and cook for us, and just hang out. I don’t want to live in constant worry about money. So I am trying to plan ahead, as we attempt to navigate our new life now. I want my family to be comfortable and feel safe and not have to worry anymore about utilities being shut off, or worry if we can afford glasses or dental care. This “year of firsts” without my dad is going to be so hard. I want us to get through it without having the burdening fear of eviction, in addition to our grief. I want my sisters to be able to get braces and glasses and driver’s license. I want to pay off these new beds and Halayna’s violin that she is learning to play. I want them to have a little money to start their adult lives with someday, to put towards college, or to have “just in case”. I don’t want them to be financially caught off guard.
I want to show them that we will be okay.
I want to know that we will be okay.
I miss my dad. I feel him near me still, at times. And through the kindness and generosity of others, I think he is still working hard to provide for us.
Thank you very much for your kindness, help, and generosity. It means the world to me.
Here is a list of things that I think I will need some help with. I know it’s a lot to ask. Please, anything will help us right now.
Thanks again
Rent for a year - $11,000
Dad’s funeral and urns for me and my sisters - $3,000
Braces/Dental Work/Exams for my sisters - $5,000
Paying off our new beds - $1,000
Used Car for Malaya and repairs on family cars - $7,000
Halayna’s Violin - $500
New glasses, eye exams - $1,000
New Refrigerator - $700
So, as mentioned before, I am not used to asking for help. If this were not such a desperate situation, or if I were in it alone, I wouldn’t ask. But I have my sisters to help look after and I want to make sure that they have a decent start in life, without the struggles my parents did. I am trying to do what my dad would have done if his situation could have been different. I am trying to plan ahead, and be more prepared for the “unknowable” things in the future. I want my dads dream of a better life for us to come true… a comfortable life, to be lived without the fear of not ever having enough money.
In addition to the previous requests, it is my hope to set up a savings account for me and my sisters in the amount of $5000 each. My sisters would have access to their money upon their graduation. Mine would be used as a cushion so that we don’t get caught off guard again. I don’t want to be unprepared.
Again, I know this is asking a lot. Those who know me will know this is wayyyy out of my comfort zone. But everything is right now. I just want us to feel safe.
Thank you all so very much.
-Nick
My dad, Justin Gray aged 42, passed away unexpectedly from heart failure on
January 23, 2019. My entire world forever changed that day.
He was an amazing man- funny, kind hearted, and completely selfless. He was a wonderful cook, a loving husband and a great dad. He always put his family first, especially me and my two younger sisters, Malaya (16) and Halayna (11).
Even though he was a hard worker, we always struggled financially. Sometimes he would go without his heart medication just so that we could have what we needed. I hate that he had to choose...
We moved into a new house just a few days before he passed away. Things felt like they were finally going to improve.
And then everything changed.
A week ago, we were excited to be setting up our new beds and have rooms of our own. And now, here I am, reaching out to people I may never meet, sharing the most personal story and devastating moment of my life.
I’m not sure quite how to do this. I have never been through anything quite like this, and my dad isn’t here to help me out. I don’t usually ask for anything, and I’m not quite sure how to, so please bear with me as I share.
My dad worked as a corrections officer at the Juvenile Detention Center here in Marion Ohio. That gave him the opportunity to meet and influence kids who, more often than not, never had a dad or a proper male role model in their life.
He used to talk to the kids there, joke with them, treat them like they were just kids, not “delinquents”. He was good for them. And they looked up to him with the utmost respect. He showed them what a good man was like. And since his passing, so many of those kids are reaching out to us, offering their condolences. We are astonished. They really loved him, but more than that, they respected him and the way he saw them. Everyone loved him. He just had a way of making you feel safe, comfortable, cared for, and important in this world.
I’ll miss that always.
Everything my dad did, he did it in constant pain. Between back injuries, surgeries and a heart condition, he couldn’t walk, bend, lift, or breathe without feeling exhausted. But he always pushed through; trying to provide for us, going to all of our school events, being there when we needed him, making us as happy as he possibly could.
He worked so hard, most times six days a week (3rd shift), not ever getting enough sleep. Financial stress and anxiety contributed to his depression and failing health. And still, there was never enough money. It didn’t seem that there was a way we could have saved for the unimaginable and the “just in case” events of life.
Since my dad has passed on, I am the sole provider of my family as of now. I am 21 years old and faced with a whole new reality, and it’s really scary. I work at Office Depot and I go to college when time and money allow. I am not prepared for what lies ahead. I don’t know how I am going to do it all.... take care of my family the way my dad did.
My dad was so proud, he wouldn’t ask for help. Unfortunately, I feel I need to. I believe there is a time to give and a time to receive. We are in need of receiving help right now.
My family has an immediate need of money for my dad’s funeral. Also, we moved into a rental property that had no refrigerator or stove. We found a stove through a family friend, and another friend is letting us borrow a small, dorm size refrigerator. But it’s not big enough for a family. My dad was planning on trying to get one soon, when we had enough money. I think we can get a new one for about $700 if we shop smart.
We need money for February’s rent. We will likely have to move because I can’t afford this place on just my income alone.
It’s going to be hard enough without my dad- to be here to laugh with us, and cook for us, and just hang out. I don’t want to live in constant worry about money. So I am trying to plan ahead, as we attempt to navigate our new life now. I want my family to be comfortable and feel safe and not have to worry anymore about utilities being shut off, or worry if we can afford glasses or dental care. This “year of firsts” without my dad is going to be so hard. I want us to get through it without having the burdening fear of eviction, in addition to our grief. I want my sisters to be able to get braces and glasses and driver’s license. I want to pay off these new beds and Halayna’s violin that she is learning to play. I want them to have a little money to start their adult lives with someday, to put towards college, or to have “just in case”. I don’t want them to be financially caught off guard.
I want to show them that we will be okay.
I want to know that we will be okay.
I miss my dad. I feel him near me still, at times. And through the kindness and generosity of others, I think he is still working hard to provide for us.
Thank you very much for your kindness, help, and generosity. It means the world to me.
Here is a list of things that I think I will need some help with. I know it’s a lot to ask. Please, anything will help us right now.
Thanks again
Rent for a year - $11,000
Dad’s funeral and urns for me and my sisters - $3,000
Braces/Dental Work/Exams for my sisters - $5,000
Paying off our new beds - $1,000
Used Car for Malaya and repairs on family cars - $7,000
Halayna’s Violin - $500
New glasses, eye exams - $1,000
New Refrigerator - $700
So, as mentioned before, I am not used to asking for help. If this were not such a desperate situation, or if I were in it alone, I wouldn’t ask. But I have my sisters to help look after and I want to make sure that they have a decent start in life, without the struggles my parents did. I am trying to do what my dad would have done if his situation could have been different. I am trying to plan ahead, and be more prepared for the “unknowable” things in the future. I want my dads dream of a better life for us to come true… a comfortable life, to be lived without the fear of not ever having enough money.
In addition to the previous requests, it is my hope to set up a savings account for me and my sisters in the amount of $5000 each. My sisters would have access to their money upon their graduation. Mine would be used as a cushion so that we don’t get caught off guard again. I don’t want to be unprepared.
Again, I know this is asking a lot. Those who know me will know this is wayyyy out of my comfort zone. But everything is right now. I just want us to feel safe.
Thank you all so very much.
-Nick
Organizer
Nick Gray
Organizer
Marion, OH