Hi friends, some of you know me some of you don’t. My names Taylor.

on October 23/2025 one day before his birthday my best-friend(most days) and the father of my child, went home to the moon and all the stars.

It has only been a couple days since he’s passed and I can see him everywhere. Feel him in my energy and my soul. He dropped me a feather today with colors only he could have handpicked. It was surreal, I was feeling sad and was yelling at the sky, as soon as I opened my eyes his feather floated back and forth in front of me and everything else went blurry. It was the only thing I could see. It was turned on the backside where the color was black. He knew that’s my favorite color. I couldn’t move at first, I looked around me and there was not a bird in sight and not even a slight breeze. Once I picked it up and flipped it over, I knew.

He is no longer here in body, but his energy can be felt by all who loved him.

Mark Anthony struggled with a progressive disease called addiction. He had fought so hard for his kids. The love him and Irelynn developed over the last two years was so comforting to watch. Coparenting the best we could being halfway across the country was by no means easy but we were well on our way. Irelynn is in shock. She keeps asking me if it’s real. I try not to cry in front of her because she’s grieving differently than I am right now and I need to meet her where she’s at, but she’s so strong. She sleeps with that blanket every night. She hasn’t taken off the necklace since it came in the mail.

The only memories that come to mind are the good ones. Even from 14 years ago. Some of them were damn wild but we made a good team.

I hope anyone reading this who knows him or doesn’t, hugs your little ones a little tighter tonight. Hold each other tighter, no matter the situation. Always say I love you before you hang up and before you say goodbye. Don’t hold grudges for too long and always take a step to see the pieces you might of played and ask if it’s really worth it. Most times, it’s not.

I Moved to the east coast in 2023 4 months sober. I’d left Colorado in end January/February and moved to an isolated mountain in California tired of my own shit.

I detoxed, and by the grace of the stars I didn’t die. I worked doubles almost every day for 4 months in a mountain where the nightly average snow fall is 6 feet. Forreal. That place saved my life. And once I knew I could do it “alone”, I took the money I made and headed east in my 2008 Ford Taurus. We broke down, a lot. I knew I was heading through Iowa and decided to call Mark, turns out he was not far and there were tornado warnings all across the state. Then came the sirens and there was not a chance in hell i was going to end up in Oz when I had gotten that far.

For the first time in years we had an adult conversation, we laughed, we cried. The next morning I had to leave and after watching me quite literally fall off the car trying to pack up the roof we said goodbye.

Once in CT it was, different. Small. SUPER small, but had a beautiful coast and people actually let you out in traffic. But man I was not ready for what was to come. I’ll spare the details but to say it was/is challenging raising a preteen now teen would putting it mildly, but Marky helped anyway he could when he could. He spent a lot of time in the hospital over the last year and half. He’d made it out of a very near death experience once before, and silly me thought that meant he was invincible and that everything would be better after that. But that void never went away, and his disease showed up again, as it always will if you don’t ask for help, or think youre worth it. He was so damn stubborn but he tried so hard to keep his demons at bay, to stay strong for his kids.

He is no longer suffering here on earth which gives me peace.

In a week or two once arrangements are settled we will say goodbye one last time to Mark in the physical. He will return to us as what every being started out as, energy gravity, timing, and moon dust.

This is the part I ask for help. Which I’m not good at especially in times like these. These last few months have been full of many changes. New opportunities. I started a job in the field I finished school for and it’s been amazing. However during the same time of switching jobs we were under a notice to quit/turned eviction. I had hardly any money saved but with the help of my saint of a mother who is sent from above, we found a place very last second. We’ve been here about 3 weeks and still adjusting to the movement. Haven’t unpacked basically anything because I work. A lot. With the rising prices funds are almost nonexistent as they are with a lot of family’s affected by the new “changes” to funding.

Having to tell your child they’ve lost a parent is the hardest thing I’ve ever done.

The second hardest would be telling her she can’t say goodbye.

Anything helps. All donations go into an account strictly for this trip. Driving is going to be our smartest and cheapest option. Being at a new job I will not have accumulated any PTO by then or vacation time.

Anything helps. And if you are not in a spot to donate, thats okay, you can still support this trip by sharing the link.

Thank you,

Taylor