Help Me Pay My Rent And Bills

Hi, my name is Merel.

 

For the past two years, I've been suffering from a severe long-term burnout and depression while also having to deal with autism, ADHD, ME/CFS (myalgic encephalomyelitis/chronic fatigue syndrome) and chronic back pain among other things.

 

Last March, the occupational physician told me I was completely fit to work while I had requested a consultation to say that my depression had severely flared up again, among other things. This was the beginning of an 8-month long battle to get that verdict overturned, which wasn't made any easier by the increased exhaustion and depression and panic attacks from getting that verdict in the first place. I'll spare you the details, but suffice it to say that my employer believed the physician more than they did me, and kept pushing me and pushing me to get back to work, even though it had already been known for months that I would not be returning to that job in the first place. And I can tell you that months of feeling treated like a liar and a fraud, regardless of what you tell them, doesn't really improve your mental health.

 

Because my employer had to follow the physician's verdict, they had put me on vacation leave instead of sick leave, meaning I got 100% pay instead of 70% pay. I knew I would have to pay that back eventually, but since 100% pay already barely covers my bills, and I had health-related expenses, I haven't been able to save much money.

The UWV (the institution that was in charge of judging whether the physician was right or I was right) was supposed to take 3-4 weeks, but instead it took well over 3.5 months. In total, I was left on vacation leave for 7 months.

 

Thankfully, the UWV agreed with my that I was indeed not fit to work at all. But that means the bill for having been paid 30% too much for so long is now due. I had hoped they would contact me to talk about how to pay that money back, because it's over €2,000, but instead they're withholding my salary until it's paid back in full without even notifying me. I had to find out when inquiring why I received so little over October.

 

So now I'm in trouble. The amount I owe is more than the amount of money I have in my possession, including savings. Even if I were to give them every last cent that I have, it wouldn't be enough. I can't even pay my bills for more than one month from my savings. And I had intended to use my savings to supplement that 70% pay, since 70% pay is less than my monthly bills already. All while I had earmarked those savings to save, so I can eventually pay off my student debts, which I should have started paying back at the beginning of 2021 but I delayed it until 2022. And at some point I'm going to have to pay the lawyer that's been helping me negotiate with my employer, and I have no idea how much that's going to be since I don't have insurance.

 

 

I'm not just low on money. I literally don't have enough of it to live off of for more than a month. My financial situation has never been so dire or so urgent.

 

I'm tired. I've been stressing out about money for almost three years in a row now, and I'm exhausted. My health has suffered enormously, not just under the stress but also because of the things I couldn't afford for my health. I've never even gotten the chance to properly save any money so I could keep my head above water in tough times. I tried finding a place to live that wouldn't cost as much, but so far no success. I tried limiting my spending, but there's nothing you can do when you earn less than your bills are even before doing groceries. I can't help that I need a lot of health care and therefore need an expensive health insurance. I can't help that I simply don't have the energy to do anything to improve my financial situation.

 

But you can help.