Toast's Heart

I’ve taken a step back and it’s because I am full of irritated water. I find myself bursting into tears at work and in my car. Last week on my 27th birthday our sweet friend Toast was diagnosed with a degenerative genetic heart disease for which there is no cure. Shes only 5 years old. She is taking medication and is in good spirits. Her little heart sounds like someone playing with a rubber band and I feel nauseas when I hear it. She could live a while longer, or could go at any time. She is my family and she performs a specific task for my mental health disability. 


This last week I was thrown into a total breakdown at the thought of her not being there with me. I took time off work, but they said they would have to replace me if I couldn’t come back on Monday. I’m sure this is not legal but I don’t have the bandwidth to fight it so I’m going to drag myself to work. I am so tired. 


I worry about her when I leave the house. I worry about her when we’re playing; I wonder if going for walks or romping around is okay for her heart. 


Spain and I found her a dog pal. We’re trying to increase the size of our pack. We named him Anything Bagel after Toast’s favorite toy. They snuggle and roll around on each other and it’s the happiest I’ve seen her in years. 


I made a gofundme for Toast’s medical bills. If anyone wants to donate it would be so greatly appreciated.


This pup is so loved and I’m going to give her the best rest of her life.