The Ebel Family

Meet the Ebel family. This is three-year-old Finley and his mamas, Tash and Joy. Tash is a full-time mom and Joy is currently working as a yoga teacher and going to nursing school. They are a beautiful, wonderful, loving part of our tribe.


On Saturday February 16th, Joy and Tash got a letter from our government that has shaken their entire universe.


The Backstory:

Joy and Tash have had a close relationship for eleven years and been in a romantic relationship for the best part of five. Joy is an American citizen and Tash is a citizen of the UK (think: magical British accent). In the time that they’ve been together, they have worked through endless logistical setbacks to make their long distance relationship work. Fin was born in the U.S. and is an American citizen. Joy and Tash were married in England in 2017, with Fin present (a marriage which is legally recognized in the U.S.). They are both listed on Fin’s birth certificate. They are finally together, in the same place, in one home, along with their dog Mr Bojangles, as a family should be.


The Issue:

There was a period of time, just after Fin was born, that Tash’s visa was coming up on its expiration. She was however, mandated by a judge to stay in the U.S. until a birth certificate issue for Finley was resolved. As SOON as that issue was resolved and the mandate was lifted, Tash left the country to return to the UK with their son. Tash then applied for a visa to return to the U.S. so that she could be with Joy and they could be together as a family. That visa was granted and she legally returned to the U.S. She was given a social security card and working papers and began an application for citizenship based on the fact that her wife and son are American citizens and that families need to be together. So far, they’ve spent roughly $10,000 on this process. The letter that Tash received in February stated that her citizenship was being denied, all her legal papers were being revoked, and that she had 30 days to return to the UK.


Most of us will never know the pain and fear of being told that we’ll need to leave our spouse and child very shortly and on our own dime, with no reassurance of when or IF we’ll be able to return. An immigration lawyer that they have been working with, noted that in 25 years of this work, she’s never seen anything like this happen. She also noted that it would probably not be happening if Joy and Tash were not a same-sex couple living under the jurisdiction of the current administration.


Now What?

Tash and Joy will be filing an appeal this week. They have been advised that the likelihood of this appeal changing the current outcome is slim to none. Joy has one full year of nursing school left until she graduates. She has been frantically applying to schools overseas but to no avail. It’s looking like she will have to remain in the U.S., move in with family, and finish her last year of school until she can move to the UK to be with Tash.  These moms have decided the best thing for their son will be to stay in the U.S. with Joy in order to provide him with family and stability. After the year, Joy and Finley will relocate to the UK with Tash where they will all live for the next 3 years until they can start this entire process over again. They are leaving behind their dedicated tight knit family and community. The goal of the appeal they’re filing is simply to buy them time. Time to find a place for Tash to live overseas, and a job, and to be able to save money for plane fares and everything else. Please imagine what this must be like for a stay-at-home mom who hasn’t spent more than four nights away from her child in the three years he’s been alive. It’s devastating, infuriating, and terrifying.


We cannot lift the full weight of this burden off of them, though we wish so badly that we could. Their lawyer has advised that it would be futile to try and “make noise” as far as community or governmental action is concerned. The amount of work and time it will take to be reunited as a family is extremely daunting for them. At this point, we’re just trying to ease their stress. From what we’ve figured, they’re going to need about $15,000 to get fully set up in the UK and for Fin and Joy to be able to visit Tash during the year that they’ll be separated. 


ANY amount of money you’re able to give will go toward:

-Legal fees

-Visas

-Passports

-Plane tickets

-Housing

-A vehicle


Please consider helping this incredible family. The current state of our country is heartbreaking but our job as humans is to add some love back in. Let’s love them through the hardest time in their lives and let them know that they are not alone.