Tess' Surgery Fund
Donation protected
My name is Tess, and I am 24 years old. In the picture above, I was 18 years old and did not realize that the desicions I would make would drastically change my life. In order for you to understand why I am here, I will explain how I got there in the first place.
When I was probably around 15, I began amatuer modeling. I joined an agency in the hopes that I would become a world famous model. I remember going into some of the auditions and standing next to all these tall, skinny, beautiful girls. They were like goddesses. They had perfect skin, long eyelashes, and didn't have any flaws. I remember being looked over all the time, and not being picked for big jobs because I was short, had acne, and a weird style.
That is where my self-esteem began declining. I was looking at myself in the mirror every couple seconds, seeing what I could change. I began hoping that I could grow taller, get better skin, and be chosen. It never happened, and I felt like nothing good would ever come about, unless I did something about it myself.
I remember a girl at school talking about how she did not eat to keep the fat off. All the girls where chiming in on their eating or non-eating habits. I remember one girl boasting about she ate what ever she want, when ever she wanted, but just purged (threw up) what ever she ate right after. Keeps the weight off, and she can still enjoy food. That is where I got the idea to start binge and purging.
I did not get any significant results until about the 3rd or 4th week into bulemia, yet I felt rewarded after looking in the mirror and seeing my hip bones. I also developed a drug habit, which also helped keep the weight off. It did not matter what drug it was, I did what ever it took. I remember the moment that I could see my ribcage and hipbones, I was so happy. I thought I was beautiful.
I never realized I was the ring leader of my own path of destruction until I started spitting out teeth. At this point, I had been binging and purging for 3 years. I was 18, and my life was falling apart. I felt lost, heart broken, and had given up. I graduated high school, then got a job. I was living life because that is what it took to be normal. I did the bare minimum of being human, and was subconciously killing myself to feel alive. I needed to get high, party, binge and purge everyday; it became normal. I became my addicitons.
I eventually got hospitalized due to consistently neglecting my health. I was forced to be sober, and eventually chose to live a healthy lifestyle. I did get better, I started to make good lifestyle desicions. I cut people out of my life, and drugs out of my life. I fell in love, and started living my life to the fullest. Though, my body is playing catch up for the years of abuse I did to it.
Now I am 24, I have not binged and purged in 6 years, and I have not done any hard drugs in 4 1/2 years; yet, my health is not in a good place. I was told almost a year ago that I have two cyst growing on my thyroid, and not too long ago I was told that was due to an infection I have in my mouth and sinuses. Due to this, I have been struggling from tooth decay, swelling of my sinsuses, and swelling of my thyroid.
My smile is not the same as it used to be, due to missing teeth from bulemia and drug use. When people look at me, I feel like they do not give me any dignity and are quick to judge. I do not know how to be around people anymore since I do feel that tension come off of them. I do not feel comfortable smiling, laughing, eating most foods, and being in social settings. Once again, all I want is to be normal.
I have been to several dentists in the past couple years and all the work that I need has been quoted over $30,000. I have no insurance, and can't really afford it either. I finally found a Cosmetic Dentistry Loan program that landed me in the office of Pristine Smiles of Rockwall with Dr. Kaushik. I have never felt so comfortable or trusting inside of a dentist office. He told me the best possible option would be removing the infection through surgery, and if I didn't do this soon, that it could be fatal.
I was quoted $8,500 for the surgery and $25,000 for the implants, and other teeth that needed to be replaced. The Cosmetic Dentistry Grant gave me $8,000 going towards $25,000, YET I must pay at least $10,000 within 30 days of being approved for the grant, (I was approved November 3rd, 2016). I am running out of time, and was hesitant to do this, yet this is my last resort.
I would be forever grateful to who ever donated, and will try to re-pay you back in what I can. I will paint you something, make you a cake, do your make up, what ever I can do to give you my everlasting thank you for helping save my life. I have put this off for too long, and was feeling hopeless for the longest time. I have faith that I can pull this off in the short time I have.
Thank you all for reading, and thank you for your donation.
When I was probably around 15, I began amatuer modeling. I joined an agency in the hopes that I would become a world famous model. I remember going into some of the auditions and standing next to all these tall, skinny, beautiful girls. They were like goddesses. They had perfect skin, long eyelashes, and didn't have any flaws. I remember being looked over all the time, and not being picked for big jobs because I was short, had acne, and a weird style.
That is where my self-esteem began declining. I was looking at myself in the mirror every couple seconds, seeing what I could change. I began hoping that I could grow taller, get better skin, and be chosen. It never happened, and I felt like nothing good would ever come about, unless I did something about it myself.
I remember a girl at school talking about how she did not eat to keep the fat off. All the girls where chiming in on their eating or non-eating habits. I remember one girl boasting about she ate what ever she want, when ever she wanted, but just purged (threw up) what ever she ate right after. Keeps the weight off, and she can still enjoy food. That is where I got the idea to start binge and purging.
I did not get any significant results until about the 3rd or 4th week into bulemia, yet I felt rewarded after looking in the mirror and seeing my hip bones. I also developed a drug habit, which also helped keep the weight off. It did not matter what drug it was, I did what ever it took. I remember the moment that I could see my ribcage and hipbones, I was so happy. I thought I was beautiful.
I never realized I was the ring leader of my own path of destruction until I started spitting out teeth. At this point, I had been binging and purging for 3 years. I was 18, and my life was falling apart. I felt lost, heart broken, and had given up. I graduated high school, then got a job. I was living life because that is what it took to be normal. I did the bare minimum of being human, and was subconciously killing myself to feel alive. I needed to get high, party, binge and purge everyday; it became normal. I became my addicitons.
I eventually got hospitalized due to consistently neglecting my health. I was forced to be sober, and eventually chose to live a healthy lifestyle. I did get better, I started to make good lifestyle desicions. I cut people out of my life, and drugs out of my life. I fell in love, and started living my life to the fullest. Though, my body is playing catch up for the years of abuse I did to it.
Now I am 24, I have not binged and purged in 6 years, and I have not done any hard drugs in 4 1/2 years; yet, my health is not in a good place. I was told almost a year ago that I have two cyst growing on my thyroid, and not too long ago I was told that was due to an infection I have in my mouth and sinuses. Due to this, I have been struggling from tooth decay, swelling of my sinsuses, and swelling of my thyroid.
My smile is not the same as it used to be, due to missing teeth from bulemia and drug use. When people look at me, I feel like they do not give me any dignity and are quick to judge. I do not know how to be around people anymore since I do feel that tension come off of them. I do not feel comfortable smiling, laughing, eating most foods, and being in social settings. Once again, all I want is to be normal.
I have been to several dentists in the past couple years and all the work that I need has been quoted over $30,000. I have no insurance, and can't really afford it either. I finally found a Cosmetic Dentistry Loan program that landed me in the office of Pristine Smiles of Rockwall with Dr. Kaushik. I have never felt so comfortable or trusting inside of a dentist office. He told me the best possible option would be removing the infection through surgery, and if I didn't do this soon, that it could be fatal.
I was quoted $8,500 for the surgery and $25,000 for the implants, and other teeth that needed to be replaced. The Cosmetic Dentistry Grant gave me $8,000 going towards $25,000, YET I must pay at least $10,000 within 30 days of being approved for the grant, (I was approved November 3rd, 2016). I am running out of time, and was hesitant to do this, yet this is my last resort.
I would be forever grateful to who ever donated, and will try to re-pay you back in what I can. I will paint you something, make you a cake, do your make up, what ever I can do to give you my everlasting thank you for helping save my life. I have put this off for too long, and was feeling hopeless for the longest time. I have faith that I can pull this off in the short time I have.
Thank you all for reading, and thank you for your donation.
Organizer
Tess Anae
Organizer
Dallas, TX
