Custody battle (Ron died 5/1/17)

$6,052 of $7,500 goal

Raised by 102 people in 30 months
Thank you for all the help you all gave Ron.  HE died on May 1st,2017.   As you all know I've been caring for him and his little girl.  In his will he left wishes for me to have his full custody and raise her into a young lady.  Unfortunately someone who had  hardly any involvement with her during the past 5 years has stepped in.   Ron would be turning over in his grave if he had any knowledge of this!   She was removed from me on my birthday, May 21 and 23 days later CPS  placed back with me due to charges of forceful touching and endangering the welfare of a child by a family member.  Today, I was granted temporary custody only until July 12th!  We need your help, we need to find an attorney and give them a retainer.. We have only $28.16 left from the balance in the go fund me. And this won't get us there.   She is a special needs child (handicap)   She has a law guardian(attorney) but he can not represent  my case...just state where feels she belongs....which isn't really of any value.  I know I have a winning case,   I have what the court would say....standing, extraordinary circumstances and in the better interest to raise and nurture this child so she can  grow up and be self sufficient!  But need an attorney to represent our case in court and keep her safe, loved,nurtured and have a normal childhood.. THE SYSTEM IS BROKE!  It needs to be fixed to save all children from being attacked, neglected and abused....I  am asking for your help, to keep her safe  and give her a life worth living!   I need an attorney, I have done all the work, exhibits  etc..but need one to place everything in LEGAL order during this upcoming hearing or she will be placed back.  PLEASE this is so important and very serious situation!!!  ANy money received or left over will go to the cancer center in Ron s memory!(if you are an attorney or  know one that is willing to help pro bono for this situation....please contact them for us!) Thank you for your time and consideration in this very serious matter!   Shirley Farmer, 333 Pease Hill Road, Brant Lake  NY 12815. And PLEASE SHARE...time is of essence,!!!!!!!!
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I need your help some more. I thought I had this somewhat taken care of. But just got my bill from the attorney. I had called since it had been almost 3 weeks from the court's decision ( just lacked one day). Plus registering for a school is hard to complete once it turns August. My attorney said she had the final court papers and I could come pick them up at the office.. When I got down there she apologized that she did not have them..... I was upset after driving 34 miles down for nothing... so she atleast made a phone call to the court to see if she could push it along..that worked..she told me to call her and let her know if I got them.... but to get charged $125.00 for going down to pick them up.... then she told me to call her and tell her I was able to pick it up, she also charged me another $100.00 (WHEN I ONLY GOT AN ANSWERING MACHINE AND LEFT HER THE MESSAGE THAT I GOT IT).. I then looked closer at the bill.. and saw that I was charged $375.00 for calling her for exactly 5 mins to let her know the accused had committed suicide... Then $25.00 for handing her a paper at our court appearance showng her the obituary. This 625.00 additional should only be 25.00 for that 5 min phone call... I now owe her an additional $726.35 totaling $1726.35 We are now emptying the house, ( an additional cost for an 18 yd dumpster) so the bank can take it back, plus see what we can get to reimburse for the funeral expense and left over housing and medical bills... this is just an added burden.. (No I can't call her, nor write her to have the bill reasoned or THAT WILL COST ME A LOT MORE!) I'm wondering once I pay her, will I get charged for her opening the envelope? I won the case in court .. due to privately talking with the other party in a separate private room... I just needed the appearance of an attorney to be able to ask to talk to the other party. Once this is over,,, it'll be a cold day in heck.. before I ever consider using an attorney for anything. I got a bad taste in my mouth due to this injustice, for over charging for what I feel was not justified. I guess I'm in the wrong line of business.. we will sell everything possible to help come up with this so she is paid in full.... and this is behind us. If you can help us out, we would sincerely appreciate it. Atleast she is safe, happy and healthy now.
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THANK YOU ALL!!! WITH OUT YOUR HELP THIS WOULD NOT HAVE BEEN POSSIBLE!!!! DANIELLE IS OFF TO STARTING A NEW BEGINNING OF A GREAT FUTURE! THIS COULD HAVE BEEN A LONG DRAWN OUT BATTLE WITH ALOT OF HURT FEELINGS .. BUT I DECIDED TO REQUEST A PRIVATE MEETING PRIOR TO THE COURT HEARING IN THE COURT HOUSE WITH ONLY HER MOM AND I....WE DECIDED THIS WAS IN THE BEST INTEREST OF DANIELLE WITH ALL CIRCUMSTANCES INVOLVED. WE WILL SHARE LEGAL CUSTODY AND I WILL HAVE FULL 100 PERCENT PHYSICAL CUSTODY. WE WALKED OUT OF COURT ROOM TOGETHER..UNDER GOOD TERMS AS I HOPED. SO THERE WASN'T ANY LOOSERS HERE.. JUST A NEW BEGGINING FOR DANIELLE'S FUTURE AND HAPPINESS!
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I want to Thank Everyone who found it in their heart to help this Special Needs Child. As you know, she has not had the opportunity to have a normal childhood as a lot of us have. She has been raised mainly by her dad and her only other close companion has been her doggie "OREO". She has not had the things we all have had, and I do not mean the material items. Ron, did his best, by teaching her how to garden, fish, hunt and other things boys usually do. I have filled in the gap for the past few years with teaching her girl things. Cooking, cleaning, hygiene, reading, writing, math and crafts/hobbies. We now, as per Ron's wishes, want to take on the role to raise her with all the love and care a child should have. With structure, education, love and understanding. Thank you again and PLEASE SHARE.. hoping this can go viral.
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We are up to $622.00. Thank you everyone for all your generosity! This may not seem like a lot.. but every dollar counts and if we don't reach enough for a retainer.. we might be able to atleast pay per diem for even her to show up for Wednesday's hearing. If Ron were around he would thank you personally for helping his daughter since he no longer can protect her.
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Read a Previous Update
Susanne Bruno Scroggins
30 months ago
4
4

Alice, I don't know you, but obviously you don't know Shirley Farmer to say such a horrible thing. Shirley is a beautiful person inside and out and your remark is mean and hurtful and the farthest words ever from the truth. You need to retract that statement or know this karma will prevail.....

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Frank Bauer
30 months ago
3
3

its a shame someone who obviously doesnt know Shirley would make such a comment. Every one who knows her, knows she is an honest, charitable,caring, loving woman! i absolutely vouch for her character! And this Man has had a rough patch and so has his daughter, and to harm their cause when they are in need is a very horrible thing to do..

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Shirley Farmer
11 months ago
2
2

Hi Diane Loika, I will answer all of your questions and reply to all of your statements. First of all, it is very costly to treated for cancer out of the area, plus to be using experimental chemo that your insurance does not cover the costs. Thank GOD for Sloan Kettering Memorial Hospital and their ENTIRE devoted staff.. that helped us be able to afford it to his end. We were not worried about his final expenses at the time.. just worried about keeping him alive long enough to possibly beat this.. and he gave it his all... 19 more months then our local doctors and hospitals gave him :) Now about his final wishes, he did not want a funeral, nor a service nor an obituary in the paper. He had his reasons re the obituary and who are we to go against his wishes and requests in his will. Now re: his possessions... non of that can be handled or sold...when you have a SPECIAL NEEDS CHILD... every thing is to be safeguarded and put into a SMALL trust for this child for her future needs... not for a court hearing or trial or for anyone else to have access too! (Even if it's for her best interest or safety since the child is a minor) Plus the cost of cleaning out the estate would eat up a lot of the profits on any small assets she may be able to salvage and put into a trust. ( as per supreme court these rules are open to the public) Unfortunately, a lot of people don't realize an estate takes time and steps to handle... and unfortunately when it's this small... its not a main concern. Now, as everyone knows, the only parent the child has had in her life in the recent 5 years has been the one with 100 percent custody... her DAD... it's not our business or concern to why another parent chooses to not be part of a child's life or lack of wanting to be involved with their child.. usually it's for the child's best interest. She was placed back with the other party and it took only 23 days for the reasonings WHY Ron had the 100 percent... when cps placed her back with me in a safe house. Now, to straighten out the situation with the one time I couldn't take anymore... it happens to us all.. If we don't admit it.. then we have an issue. I being a tax preparer with well over 500 clients, and It was at the ending stage of tax season, I just got back from our usual trips to the hospital with her dad, staying up to 2:30 am and back up at 7am... 7 days a week.. also taking care of Ron and Danielle.. that she crossed the line ( and I knew I couldn't take anymore.. you can only spread yourself so thin...)..I had to have a rest a respite vacation.. and set my priorities in an order and number one was with him surviving... so he could remain her DADDY... so she went to nice kind, religious, older couple's home, which CPS more than approved, for me to have a breather and direct my attention to getting her dad back to NYC for a life saving possibility. And for me to build up my own health to be able to carry on this extra burden. Until you walk a day in someone elses shoes you would never understand. Running a business out of your home where you have to make 12 months of income in only 12 weeks, taking care of your own family with a disabled husband due to his cancer treatments, and then try to save another party from his cancer and also raise his Special Needs Child as your own.. and their pets, bringing in their wood daily for heat, writing essays for help with his treatments, keeping scheduled appointments for them.. and also remember caring for TWO homes, his as well as ours while he was trying to survive.. it tires you out .... But now we are moving forward... one step at a time.. first priority is her safety and well being with nurturing and love...which is number one in his will...second is finishing with his final wishes in his will to get rid of his belongings. I hope this answered all your questions and statements... and hope you find it in your heart to help keep her safe...Thank you ,

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Amy Combs-Baker
30 months ago
2
2

Unbelievable , shame on this lady for not doing her due diligence on the beautiful , kind , giving person that she is Shirley Farmer . I too will vouch for her character . Shirley has helped me and my children before my husband passed of cancer and still yet . Thank you Shirley for all you do . You are one of my Hero's . Much love to you and your family .

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Donna DeMartino Wilt
30 months ago
2
2

Shame on you Allice Henshaw!!!!

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Shirley Farmer
30 months ago
2
2

WOW.. Allice Henshaw, May the Lord Have Mercy on You and Sue BOTH. We would all praise the Lord if this diagnosis wasn't true.. but unfortunately it is.... We will pray that this doesn't happen to either one of you in the future, but unfortunately it could. I pray that you are given forgiveness from all the kind loving people that know the truth and are willing to help this family in their time of need. Unfortunately I can and will not, at this time, forgive such a rude, inconsiderate lying statement, but may God take Mercy on you two.

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$6,052 of $7,500 goal

Raised by 102 people in 30 months
Created December 6, 2015
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$100
Karen Hayes
10 months ago

I wish you the very best in these times. I wish I could do more. Know that you are an angel, stepping up and offering everything to help Danielle. <3 I wish happiness and peaceful times for your future. <3 The very best of luck to you both.

$100
Anonymous
10 months ago
KD
$100
Kathleen Dubay
11 months ago

God Bless you Shirley. This child is in need of a loving home and you are just what she needs. May God help in the process of making this happen.

JH
$100
Jim & Ellen Hickson
11 months ago

God Bless

CP
$42
Colleen Panos
11 months ago

This is the amount raised today at the Potsdam farmer's market generated through a raffle with the winning prize being a basket of jams/jelly

$50
Anonymous
11 months ago
Susanne Bruno Scroggins
30 months ago
4
4

Alice, I don't know you, but obviously you don't know Shirley Farmer to say such a horrible thing. Shirley is a beautiful person inside and out and your remark is mean and hurtful and the farthest words ever from the truth. You need to retract that statement or know this karma will prevail.....

+ Read More
Frank Bauer
30 months ago
3
3

its a shame someone who obviously doesnt know Shirley would make such a comment. Every one who knows her, knows she is an honest, charitable,caring, loving woman! i absolutely vouch for her character! And this Man has had a rough patch and so has his daughter, and to harm their cause when they are in need is a very horrible thing to do..

+ Read More
Shirley Farmer
11 months ago
2
2

Hi Diane Loika, I will answer all of your questions and reply to all of your statements. First of all, it is very costly to treated for cancer out of the area, plus to be using experimental chemo that your insurance does not cover the costs. Thank GOD for Sloan Kettering Memorial Hospital and their ENTIRE devoted staff.. that helped us be able to afford it to his end. We were not worried about his final expenses at the time.. just worried about keeping him alive long enough to possibly beat this.. and he gave it his all... 19 more months then our local doctors and hospitals gave him :) Now about his final wishes, he did not want a funeral, nor a service nor an obituary in the paper. He had his reasons re the obituary and who are we to go against his wishes and requests in his will. Now re: his possessions... non of that can be handled or sold...when you have a SPECIAL NEEDS CHILD... every thing is to be safeguarded and put into a SMALL trust for this child for her future needs... not for a court hearing or trial or for anyone else to have access too! (Even if it's for her best interest or safety since the child is a minor) Plus the cost of cleaning out the estate would eat up a lot of the profits on any small assets she may be able to salvage and put into a trust. ( as per supreme court these rules are open to the public) Unfortunately, a lot of people don't realize an estate takes time and steps to handle... and unfortunately when it's this small... its not a main concern. Now, as everyone knows, the only parent the child has had in her life in the recent 5 years has been the one with 100 percent custody... her DAD... it's not our business or concern to why another parent chooses to not be part of a child's life or lack of wanting to be involved with their child.. usually it's for the child's best interest. She was placed back with the other party and it took only 23 days for the reasonings WHY Ron had the 100 percent... when cps placed her back with me in a safe house. Now, to straighten out the situation with the one time I couldn't take anymore... it happens to us all.. If we don't admit it.. then we have an issue. I being a tax preparer with well over 500 clients, and It was at the ending stage of tax season, I just got back from our usual trips to the hospital with her dad, staying up to 2:30 am and back up at 7am... 7 days a week.. also taking care of Ron and Danielle.. that she crossed the line ( and I knew I couldn't take anymore.. you can only spread yourself so thin...)..I had to have a rest a respite vacation.. and set my priorities in an order and number one was with him surviving... so he could remain her DADDY... so she went to nice kind, religious, older couple's home, which CPS more than approved, for me to have a breather and direct my attention to getting her dad back to NYC for a life saving possibility. And for me to build up my own health to be able to carry on this extra burden. Until you walk a day in someone elses shoes you would never understand. Running a business out of your home where you have to make 12 months of income in only 12 weeks, taking care of your own family with a disabled husband due to his cancer treatments, and then try to save another party from his cancer and also raise his Special Needs Child as your own.. and their pets, bringing in their wood daily for heat, writing essays for help with his treatments, keeping scheduled appointments for them.. and also remember caring for TWO homes, his as well as ours while he was trying to survive.. it tires you out .... But now we are moving forward... one step at a time.. first priority is her safety and well being with nurturing and love...which is number one in his will...second is finishing with his final wishes in his will to get rid of his belongings. I hope this answered all your questions and statements... and hope you find it in your heart to help keep her safe...Thank you ,

+ Read More
Amy Combs-Baker
30 months ago
2
2

Unbelievable , shame on this lady for not doing her due diligence on the beautiful , kind , giving person that she is Shirley Farmer . I too will vouch for her character . Shirley has helped me and my children before my husband passed of cancer and still yet . Thank you Shirley for all you do . You are one of my Hero's . Much love to you and your family .

+ Read More
Donna DeMartino Wilt
30 months ago
2
2

Shame on you Allice Henshaw!!!!

+ Read More
Shirley Farmer
30 months ago
2
2

WOW.. Allice Henshaw, May the Lord Have Mercy on You and Sue BOTH. We would all praise the Lord if this diagnosis wasn't true.. but unfortunately it is.... We will pray that this doesn't happen to either one of you in the future, but unfortunately it could. I pray that you are given forgiveness from all the kind loving people that know the truth and are willing to help this family in their time of need. Unfortunately I can and will not, at this time, forgive such a rude, inconsiderate lying statement, but may God take Mercy on you two.

+ Read More
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