The Cunningham's are Adopting!
Donation protected
Are you surprised? So are we! Our plan for children has been unexpected and not at all what we had in mind but we are excited to announce that we have started the process of adopting a sweet baby. It's not easy to ask for money but we hope that you know your support will be going towards a dream come true. If you cannot give financially, your thoughts and/or prayers are just as valuable!
Disclaimer: We don't tell our story to have a pity party, we just want you to know where we've been and where we hope to be.
About a year into our marriage (2013), we made the big decision to start a family. Within 2 months of that decision, I was already pregnant! We were over the moon and things were going well as far as we knew but within 7 weeks, I had a miscarriage. It was all such a whirlwind of emotion and extreme pain but we were hopeful and thought, surely it won't happen again. Not long after that, I got pregnant again. That pregnancy ended as quickly as it began as I had what's called a Blighted Ovum. It occurs when an embryo never develops, or stops developing. Often, no specific cause is apparent. Since I had already had 1 miscarriage, as soon as I got a positive pregnancy test, I had to get my blood drawn to test my hormone levels so this time, they knew right away it was not good. After this, we took a break from trying for a baby so that we could heal and just be for a little while. During this break, the doctors were starting to take it all more seriously now that miscarriage #2 had occurred. Neither loss had a definitive answer of why but they started me on medication to hopefully keep my hormone levels up to where they needed to be. We had high hopes that this would help and gave it a shot for a few months. I eventually got pregnant again. My levels were all good and we couldn't believe it! When we went in for our first sonogram, the tech said, "Well, we have good news and bad news. I see two babies (the medication can cause multiples) but one is not developing. The other one looks great though." We were sad and ecstatic all at the same time. We got to see the babies and even hear the heartbeat. I had to go get a sonogram weekly due to my history so the following week, I went in and the baby had grown and I heard the heartbeat again. Phew, this was going so well! We got a print out of the sonogram baby pics and everything. It was becoming real. Since everything was progressing, they said I could come back in 2 weeks. I was nervous to wait that long but didn't really have a choice so we finally get to that appointment trying to remain hopeful. The sonogram starts and there is quiet. I knew something was wrong but didn't want to believe it and she checked and double checked and then said, "I'm really sorry, there is no heartbeat." She said she was going to get the doctor and to meet them in the other room when we were ready. As we were walking down the hall, I remember hearing the echo of baby heartbeats from the other rooms. It was the worst day. We get into the room with the doctor and she said that I had to have surgery to remove the babies. I was shocked because I was only 9 weeks along but it was what had to be done this time. I opted to have surgery the next day to get it over with. Through surgery, they were able to do tests on the babies to see what went wrong. It came out that they both had chromosomal defects. They also did many tests on me and concluded that my body doesn't produce enough folic acid, etc. They tested both of our chromosomes and those came up normal. Everything they found that was wrong was easily fixable (minus the unexplained chromosomal issues) so that was nice to hear after all of that. We thought that we finally had all of the answers that we needed and could eventually have no problems with carrying a child to term. Some time after this (2016), we got pregnant again and thought this is it! I had started with a new doctor and at my first sonogram, she said that the baby wasn't progressing normally but that we would check the next week. The next week came and unfortunately there was no heartbeat. If you're tracking with all of this, we lost 5 babies within 3 years. The new doctor immediately referred us to a Reproductive Endocrinologist. We both had to do multiple tests and procedures. I did a monthly infusion, shots, etc for about a year and never became pregnant. I was not a huge fan of the doctor so we switched to a different Reproductive Endocrinologist. We met with him one time and I think he was the most honest doctor we'd been to after all this time. He said that we have had bad luck (he's not the first doctor that said this to us) which is not helpful at all but he did say that due to the chromosomal issues and now not getting pregnant for a long time, that In Vitro Fertilization (IVF) was our best route. He said that it would be 60-70% chance of working. We left the appointment very upset yet it was what I needed to hear. It took me a few days to come to terms with what I was feeling but we came to the conclusion that we had been through enough loss and 60-70% chance was not high enough. It is so expensive and harsh on your body and to not have 100% of getting a baby out of it is not worth it to us. This is where adoption comes in. We had always wanted to adopt a child eventually but "after we have our biological children" was our "plan." Once we got clarity and peace over the decision of not doing IVF, adoption became the obvious and surprisingly exciting choice. Adoption is a beautiful thing and the 100% chance of becoming parents that we are happy to announce that we are pursuing.
We have met with our Adoption Specialist, Julia, through ABC Counseling and have a list of things to complete before we can officially be on the waiting list for a newborn. Each step costs money but the process can be in our own timing, but obviously we hope to get everything completed as soon as possible. We will do each step as soon as we have the money to do so. If you have any questions regarding any part of this, please do not hesitate to reach out to us.
Thank you for reading our story and for supporting us through this very emotional, yet exciting time in our lives!
Love,
Jordan and Mindy Cunningham
Disclaimer: We don't tell our story to have a pity party, we just want you to know where we've been and where we hope to be.
About a year into our marriage (2013), we made the big decision to start a family. Within 2 months of that decision, I was already pregnant! We were over the moon and things were going well as far as we knew but within 7 weeks, I had a miscarriage. It was all such a whirlwind of emotion and extreme pain but we were hopeful and thought, surely it won't happen again. Not long after that, I got pregnant again. That pregnancy ended as quickly as it began as I had what's called a Blighted Ovum. It occurs when an embryo never develops, or stops developing. Often, no specific cause is apparent. Since I had already had 1 miscarriage, as soon as I got a positive pregnancy test, I had to get my blood drawn to test my hormone levels so this time, they knew right away it was not good. After this, we took a break from trying for a baby so that we could heal and just be for a little while. During this break, the doctors were starting to take it all more seriously now that miscarriage #2 had occurred. Neither loss had a definitive answer of why but they started me on medication to hopefully keep my hormone levels up to where they needed to be. We had high hopes that this would help and gave it a shot for a few months. I eventually got pregnant again. My levels were all good and we couldn't believe it! When we went in for our first sonogram, the tech said, "Well, we have good news and bad news. I see two babies (the medication can cause multiples) but one is not developing. The other one looks great though." We were sad and ecstatic all at the same time. We got to see the babies and even hear the heartbeat. I had to go get a sonogram weekly due to my history so the following week, I went in and the baby had grown and I heard the heartbeat again. Phew, this was going so well! We got a print out of the sonogram baby pics and everything. It was becoming real. Since everything was progressing, they said I could come back in 2 weeks. I was nervous to wait that long but didn't really have a choice so we finally get to that appointment trying to remain hopeful. The sonogram starts and there is quiet. I knew something was wrong but didn't want to believe it and she checked and double checked and then said, "I'm really sorry, there is no heartbeat." She said she was going to get the doctor and to meet them in the other room when we were ready. As we were walking down the hall, I remember hearing the echo of baby heartbeats from the other rooms. It was the worst day. We get into the room with the doctor and she said that I had to have surgery to remove the babies. I was shocked because I was only 9 weeks along but it was what had to be done this time. I opted to have surgery the next day to get it over with. Through surgery, they were able to do tests on the babies to see what went wrong. It came out that they both had chromosomal defects. They also did many tests on me and concluded that my body doesn't produce enough folic acid, etc. They tested both of our chromosomes and those came up normal. Everything they found that was wrong was easily fixable (minus the unexplained chromosomal issues) so that was nice to hear after all of that. We thought that we finally had all of the answers that we needed and could eventually have no problems with carrying a child to term. Some time after this (2016), we got pregnant again and thought this is it! I had started with a new doctor and at my first sonogram, she said that the baby wasn't progressing normally but that we would check the next week. The next week came and unfortunately there was no heartbeat. If you're tracking with all of this, we lost 5 babies within 3 years. The new doctor immediately referred us to a Reproductive Endocrinologist. We both had to do multiple tests and procedures. I did a monthly infusion, shots, etc for about a year and never became pregnant. I was not a huge fan of the doctor so we switched to a different Reproductive Endocrinologist. We met with him one time and I think he was the most honest doctor we'd been to after all this time. He said that we have had bad luck (he's not the first doctor that said this to us) which is not helpful at all but he did say that due to the chromosomal issues and now not getting pregnant for a long time, that In Vitro Fertilization (IVF) was our best route. He said that it would be 60-70% chance of working. We left the appointment very upset yet it was what I needed to hear. It took me a few days to come to terms with what I was feeling but we came to the conclusion that we had been through enough loss and 60-70% chance was not high enough. It is so expensive and harsh on your body and to not have 100% of getting a baby out of it is not worth it to us. This is where adoption comes in. We had always wanted to adopt a child eventually but "after we have our biological children" was our "plan." Once we got clarity and peace over the decision of not doing IVF, adoption became the obvious and surprisingly exciting choice. Adoption is a beautiful thing and the 100% chance of becoming parents that we are happy to announce that we are pursuing.
We have met with our Adoption Specialist, Julia, through ABC Counseling and have a list of things to complete before we can officially be on the waiting list for a newborn. Each step costs money but the process can be in our own timing, but obviously we hope to get everything completed as soon as possible. We will do each step as soon as we have the money to do so. If you have any questions regarding any part of this, please do not hesitate to reach out to us.
Thank you for reading our story and for supporting us through this very emotional, yet exciting time in our lives!
Love,
Jordan and Mindy Cunningham
Organizer
Mindy Cunningham
Organizer
Bement, IL
