Help Frank start over.

Hello,

If you are reading this you may already know me. If not, please allow me to introduce myself:

 

My name is Frank Fontsere'.

I've been a professional drummer for the past 25 years.

I've had the opportunity to tour the US, Canada, Europe, and Australia.

I've met and worked with many amazing artists, recorded 15 albums, and played to thousands of fans everywhere from small clubs to arenas.

 

Yet, I find myself at a crossroads. I'm stepping away from touring and, in my 50's, starting practically my entire career over. To that end I'm attempting to raise $6000 so that I can begin a new venture. One that I am pursuing because it has become deeply meaningful to me.

 

I am making an appeal to your generosity with some hesitancy because after all, it may sound as though I have lived a charmed life.

 

You may be understandably curious as to why I feel the need to raise funds because surely someone who can list these accomplishments has piles of money.

 

Not necessarily.

 

If you will indulge me, I'd like to tell you my story:

 

I started playing drums at 10 years old and soon realized that I KNEW I was going to be a rockstar!

This was my dream. Many schoolmates laughed at the idea that this was to be my destiny. Who could blame them? After all, I was shy and kind of awkward. Not even close to what most would have considered "ROCKSTAR material". Undeterred, I chased my vision. My parents were naturally skeptical but supportive of their young dreamer. They even took me to see my first KISS concert. Their fingers in their ears they tried to grin and bear it. They wanted their son to be happy. Like any caring, sensible Mom and Dad they tried to convince me to have a back-up plan; but I knew it wasn't necessary.

I had no doubt. It was GOING TO HAPPEN!

 

And it DID!

 

Sort of.

 

Let me explain.

 

A lot of teens with similar dreams of fame and fortune enthusiastically bang away on drums and guitars in their parents' garage. Maybe they even play a few local clubs. Not surprisingly, after a few years of frustration most realize that stardom is not to be. They quit playing, get a good job and settle down. Some keep instruments in their basement to tinker around with on their off days. They may even form a cover band to play weekend gigs . In other words they grow up. Nothing at all wrong with that. Perfectly sensible thing to do.

 

"...Jimmy quit, Jodie got married. Should have known, we'd never get far..." - Bryan Adams

 

I didn't follow that path.

 

I admit to dark moments where I wonder if I should have.

 

When the reality eventually dawned on me that platinum albums and stadium tours were not in my future I didn't give up playing. I modified the dream of being rich and famous into what I thought was a realistic goal of being able to make a decent living doing something that I truly loved. I subsequently made a promise to myself that I was committed to being a working musician. Come hell or high water, I was a player. I took a great deal of pride in the notion that I was one of the few who stuck it out while so many others had given up on their dreams.

 

"...some will sell their dreams for small desires..." - Neil Peart

 

My rationalization was that the music business is a business like any other and that there are opportunities to be taken advantage of. Therefore, I stayed in the game.

 

In 2000 I met my soul mate Tracy. We married in 2006. She knew I was a musician and she was supportive of my lifes choice. Even though being married to a traveling man could be hard, she has always had, and still has, my back. We love each other and are in it forever. We promised each other "for better or worse, for richer or poorer", and we meant it.

We're a team.

 

Staying in the game has paid off.

 

Not financially, but as I detailed earlier, I have had the opportunity to do things that most people only get to fantasize about. I have played on albums that have inspired dedicated fans all over the world. I have traveled on tour buses and once even a private plane. I've been written about in magazines. I have been in music videos viewed by millions of people. To the outside observer it may truly appear to be a fantasy come true.

 

In many ways it was. I will forever be grateful for those experiences.

 

The reality though is that it is work. Gratifying work, but work nonetheless.

 

My income always came from continued playing. I never had what's known as "skin in the game". Since I am not a song writer I never received any publishing. Money from touring was good, but sporadic. I always had to keep some kind of "regular" job. The kind of job that would allow me to take long periods of time off for touring. Jobs of that nature don't usually provide much security. That was ok though. Tracy and I lived small and we got by. We were ok with living small. To my mind, I would never have a traditional "retirement" whereas I quit working and enjoyed my "golden years". I would work till the day I died.

 

On November 15th 2014, two and half months after my 47th birthday, our son Ian was born.

 

I had gone my whole adult life thinking that I was one of those people who didn't want to be a father. Tracy and I had never planned on having kids, so when she told me she was pregnant, it was a complete surprise. I worried about being able to support a family by being a traveling drummer. I considered walking away from what I had invested so much of myself in. To her credit, she told me not to quit. We'll figure it out. We always have. God bless her.

 

So I stuck to it.

 

Like a lot of men, I never knew I was meant to be a father until I held my little boy in my arms for the first time. As a young guy dreaming of rock stardom the idea of being a "family man" seemed hopelessly straight laced and boring. Parenthood was just not for me. I was, however, never really a party animal. I rarely drink and have never smoked or done any drugs. I was always introverted and quiet offstage. I guess deep down I was always more boring and straight laced than I had assumed. As soon as I laid eyes on my new born child I knew that being a "family man" was exactly what I wanted to be.

 

We brought Ian Michael Fontsere' home for the first time at 5pm on Monday November 17th 2014.

 

I left the next morning for a three week tour.

 

That was one of the hardest days of my life.

 

Life continued on. I kept going on tours and working jobs to keep the bills paid. Tracy became a full-time mom. Ian grew. We struggled financially, but we were happy. Despite living paycheck to paycheck and always worrying about our financial future, we have always considered ourselves lucky. We love each other and we love our beautiful boy. God has blessed us.

 

2017 was the beginning of an upward trajectory for us. Touring started picking up and the pizza delivery job I had on the side was bringing in decent money. For the most part I felt a sense of momentum that I had been struggling to achieve for years. In 2018, we decided that we wanted our son to grow up with a front and back yard so we moved from our one-bedroom apartment to a rental house that we loved. This had been a very hopeful period and I wrapped up 2018 tired from the road but looking forward to the future. I was looking forward to a short break and then a busy 2019.

 

2019 turned out to be a disappointing year. Touring was almost non existent because the band took a hiatus and money from the side job began dropping off. Significantly. Everyday working conditions at that job were becoming increasingly intolerable, I was on the edge of depression. A feeling I had always been able to avoid. I looked for other income opportunities but finding a job that would allow for the time off that I would need for touring was difficult. I tried to just stay strong and hold out until 2020 when the band would again be super active. 2019 was a dark year that I was happy to leave behind. I knew that the next year was going to put me back on the path. On the morning of New Year's day 2020 I felt a sense of relief and renewed energy. It felt as if the clouds had finally parted. Touring for a new album was scheduled for early spring and I couldn't wait to get back on the road.

 

Everyone knows what happened next.

 

I had thought that 2019 was a dark year.

 

Please don't misunderstand, I don't mean to sound like the pandemic was my own personal tragedy. I am perfectly aware that many, many people suffered far more than I did. My family and I managed to avoid illness and I thank God for that. Because I live in Georgia, I was able to still work my restaurant job doing deliveries and I was able to keep the lights on and food on the table at home. Still I wondered how long it would be before I ever got to tour again. I hadn't worked toward being a musician for all those years so I could deliver pizza for 50 hours a week. Especially for continuously diminishing returns. I began to feel like I was drowning. I left that job in May of 2021. I scraped by for a few months waiting for the next tour.

 

Finally in September of 2021 we did our first proper tour. We followed that up with a very successful UK tour this past December. There was a release date for a new album next spring. I was in the situation I had been waiting for for almost 2 years . The problem is, even though I was finally back on the road, I was miserable. I couldn't believe it. I'd been kept from touring for the better part of 18 months and now that I had the chance to get back on the road, it was not what I wanted any more. I felt tired and worn down. I had worked toward this for 25 years but now had a family whom I loved that I was leaving at home. My son was growing up and I didn't want to miss any of it. Not even for a few weeks at a time. I tried to deny it because being a touring musician had been how I thought of myself for so long. It was my identity. I had prided myself on being one of the rare ones who toughed it out and kept on going. It's been hard to accept but I have to be honest with myself, I don't want to be on the road anymore.

 

Then art came in to my life.

 

Even though the idea of creating art had long been in the back of my mind, I had always prioritized other pursuits. I was really into drawing when I was a child but it fell by the wayside when I got my first drumkit. While working in construction in the early 2000's I used to go through Home Depot with my boss shopping for supplies and I would see building materials and wonder how they could possibly be used in art. I lived in an apartment and would wonder what it would be like to have a big, open art studio and throw paint at huge canvases like Pollock and de Kooning and other early 20th century expressionists. Like a lot of people, I would often think to myself that I should try my hand at painting but something always came first.

 

In 2019 while the band was on hiatus I finally tried my hand at painting. I began by taking old cymbals and drum heads and creating abstract drip style paintings (ala Jackson Pollock) on them. My hope was to be able to sell them to our fans for extra income.

 

I fell in love with it. Maybe even became obsessed. I guess it's no surprise really. My late uncle Carles Fontsere' was a famous and respected artist in Spain. I suppose the desire to create art was more a part of me than I had ever suspected. I began watching art videos on youtube and following abstract painters on Instagram. I wanted to do what they are doing. It was taking up almost all my mental space. The first time I ever created a painting that I considered "finished" it was incredibly and deeply gratifying. Not the least because it was something I had done with no dependency on collaboration. It was completely my own creation. I had willed a new part of me into existence. I kept exploring and started to develop an individual style. I want to learn and create as much as possible. I want to study acrylic painting, digital art and possibly even graphic design. My desire is to create works that are of enough uniqueness and quality that they will be in demand in various online marketplaces, that can inspire a following of collectors and eventually be shown in galleries.

 

If it's creative and visual I want to do it.

 

I'm not giving up playing drums. I'll never give up drumming. I just want to play for the love of it. I want to do drumming videos and play live with musicians of different styles. I want drumming to be a passion again as opposed to merely a way to make a living. I want to do it on my terms.

 

I could go on and on about all the things I'd like to accomplish. However, if you've made it this far, I'd like to share with you how you can be a part of my new journey. My first art goal is to finish and sell 100 paintings in the next three to six months. I've become fascinated with hard-edge geometric painting. I've begun a series I am calling "Parameters part 1". These are being posted on my Frankfontsere and Frankfontsereart Instagram pages and on my Facebook profile. These works are high contrast geometric paintings on 16" x 20" canvases where I've limited myself to only using black paint on white. I want to see how far I can take this concept before I incorporate other colors and elements which will constitute parts 2, 3 and 4 ect.. Painting has given me the most creative satisfaction I've experienced in a very long time.

 

I am attempting to raise $6000 dollars in order to cover my rent for six months. If you are generous enough to help me realize this goal it will allow me to really focus on making headway with this new endeavor. I will be able to make a fresh start in my life and be more of a true creator than I've ever been. Being able to be a creator will help me be a better husband to my wonderful and supportive wife and the best father I can be to my amazing and intelligent son.

 

I realize that there are millions of people out there who have very deep troubles and are in need of serious help. I'm not entirely comfortable asking strangers - or even people who know me - to contribute to my efforts when there are people out there who are truly suffering. If, however, you decide to invest in me with any amount you see fit, you have my solemn promise to make the most of it. You will also have my humble gratitude.

 

Thanks for listening.

 

Frank Fontsere'.