I’m organizing this fundraiser as an intermediary on behalf of a close friend, a resilient mother and survivor of a lifetime of abuse. She is fighting to reclaim her independence and create a safe, stable life for her children. Due to the financial manipulation and control asserted over her, she has asked me to be her proxy to ensure her abuser cannot access and misappropriate the funds. However no one can better tell her story than her, so now I will let her share in her own words.

For the past fourteen years, I lived in a marriage that was defined by coercion, control, financial abuse and things more physically harmful. Every part of my life, access to money, to work, to basic autonomy was tightly managed, restricted, and in some cases completely removed from me. Over time, the constant stress and fear took a serious toll on my health. I now live with chronic illness and disability, and at this time I am unable to work while also rebuilding the life I had stripped from me.

As any person in this situation can tell you, leaving isn’t as simple as just walking away. Because of years of financial dependency, I can’t afford the legal support I need to finalize my divorce and begin to build a safe, stable life for myself and my children. With the help of wonderful people I managed to find the courage to take this step, but the cost of legal representation, court filings, and essential transition expenses have become barriers that seem impossible to overcome alone. There are many wonderful programs and services that help people in situations similar to mine, but unfortunately due to guidelines made to protect them most of them are unable to help people who are still in the same house as their abuser. And due to a history of familial abuse we don’t have access to a safe place where my kids and I can turn to for refuge.

I’m asking for an act of generosity from people who may not know my name, but may know this all too common story. Any gift will be put towards the legal fees and immediate safety needs. This is not just about ending a marriage, but reclaiming my independence and my dignity. Not only for my future but this a chance to give my children the opportunities they deserve, to see what healthy love looks like, to learn that they never have to accept control or fear as a part of family life. I want to show them that we can break the cycle of generational trauma and abuse, and build something together, something that I didn’t have growing up nor did my parents. This fight is brutal but I refuse to leave my children in this life.

This is about survival, but truthfully this is about hope, the hope of a peaceful future with a safe home, stability, and the room to heal. If you’re able to contribute or share, please know that your support means more than I can express. This next financial hurdle is a $750 evaluation of the marital home to provide a fair assessment of how to settle the equitable separation process. Additional costs include the legal fees, which if things continue to be the battle it has been, were quoted of up to $25,000. Every dollar helps me move closer to freedom, safety, and the future my children and I deserve. I don’t expect that in the time we’re in that many people even with all the empathy in their heart could bear this entire financial burden. Perhaps if a few can give a little, I will be able to conquer this next hurdle and that is enough to keep this hope alive.

For safety reasons, my name and location aren’t being shared, but all funds raised will go directly toward legal and transitional expenses. Thank you for helping me and my family take this step toward freedom and healing.