Escaping Foster Home: Domestic Violence, Animal Cruelty, etc

Hi everyone,

I wanted to start by saying thank you so much for your help on my last GFM! I was able to get my GED which helped me get a job, and I really appreciate it.

I am 18. My parents died in my childhood and since then I have been moved throughout several homes, eventually landing me with my music teacher’s (now ex) husband in around 2023, who I refer to as dad.

He has displayed physical abuse, domestic violence, animal cruelty, and starvation, and other awful things towards me and the people in his life.

When I was 16, he hosed me down outside and beat me, pinned me against the ground by my knees until I sobbed because he was upset. He has thrown objects at me, leaving scars on my face, dragged me out of my bed, slamming me onto the ground, and hit me repeatedly, asking me why I was so stupid.

He was also very controlling with my phone and was able to get into my texts using my number to send out more when I reported the abuse. CPS did not believe me. They claimed I was lying for attention. At this time, he was still with his wife, so they left me at a police station, then a hospital to try to get rid of me. They were threatened with a child abandonment charge, and I had to go back into their care after being placed with a friend for a week as CPS did not know what to do.

He had a dog named Zeus that he could no longer afford to take care of, and instead of rehoming him, he kept him and let him slowly starve, noting that he would “rather shoot this dog than give it away.” (as his breed is very expensive). Luckily, I was able to rehome Zeus to good people, but that went on for months. They are not supposed to be that small. Visibly, Zeus was starving.

I also had a kitten I had rescued that I absolutely loved. When we moved, he made me leave him outside alone and abandon him. He had hit and choked the kitten repeatedly, and I had to have him be rescued by people on FB.

Lastly, I had a guinea pig named Ponyo that I also loved very dearly. He helped me with depression and a lot of other issues. He fell ill last year and was having seizures. With help from the vet, he could have been saved, but instead my dad refused and waited over two days for him to slowly suffer and die.

I have video proof of this, but it is very graphic and hard for me to watch. To see such a small thing suffer is horrible.

My dad’s ex-wife left him because of me, and here is just a series of more texts between them that I had to deal with. She also broke into our house once to accuse me of stealing, which will be linked to the end of this.

My dad tends to let random old homeless friends of his live with us. The last time this happened, a hole was kicked into my wall by one while I was at Job Corps. I came back to my room a mess; there were lewd toys in my drawers touching my things, evidence they had been sleeping in my bed together, an ant infestation—everything was generally just disgusting, and it was my responsibility to clean.

He is also a serial cheater, which began around half a year ago. This led to constant fights, domestic violence, etc., around the house late at night. I have audio/video evidence of him threatening to hurt himself with a weapon, audio evidence of his girlfriend(s) choking and asking him to stop, and audio of him hitting and “restraining” them, which will be linked at the end of this. It is likely triggering to hear, so if you have any issues with things of that nature, please save yourself the trouble of watching it.

Lastly, my dad’s credit cards are maxed out, and his financial decisions are horrible. My (now ex) stepmom has had to be the one to pay our electric bill this month. When confronted about this, my dad said we could stay in the dark for all he cared. I don’t know if we will have to pay any bills ourselves next month. We don’t have much food in the fridge at the moment either.

As of now, I have one job at a gas station, and I have been working for my dad at his store for years now. I do not get paid. He also hires undocumented people and people in desperate situations to avoid paying them.

My boyfriend, who currently lives with us, also has to work there unpaid and has been having to drive around all day for the business and reimburse the gas money himself, which is draining our funds. The car broke down, which is another expense we will likely have to cover ourselves; it was quoted to be around $600. We also pay for groceries ourselves, and as said before, will likely have to pay bills next month. My boyfriend’s projected start date for work is the 21st, and in the meantime, he has been trying to find other ways to make money or get a second job. However, this is hard as my dad is really unreliable (he keeps promising to drop him off at gigs and then falling through at the last minute) and would rather have him work for free, which takes up a ton of time and resources.

All of my money has been being budgeted, which leaves me very little for basic necessities, or even to save to try to leave here.

On the bright side, we have a good offer from a friend to help us move in sometime in August—we just need extra support to help us survive in the meantime and get to that point, or to be prepared if any random kicking out happens (dad is very unpredictable and unstable). He is also evading child support, which makes it likely he might not even be around in a few months.

I am willing to answer any questions about this situation, as I know it’s super complicated.

My dad is dangerous and unpredictable, and it makes me really scared at times. I just want somewhere stable to stay so I can finally begin healing from this, and my other experiences in the system.

Thank you so much for reading.

VIDEO EVIDENCE