Alan’s Family Crisis

UPDATE: Alan’s scheduled to be discharged from the hospital tomorrow. However, the doctors are suggesting he stay in a hotel for a week before getting on a plane to return home. He can fly home a little sooner if he desires, being that it’s a short flight but there are risks of his lungs being negatively affected (worse case lungs collapsing). If he does return home sooner, insurance will not pay for his flight. We’re weighing the options. They’ll pay for his hotel, thankfully. But will not pay for any other related costs during his week of waiting. Costs of food, Uber, etc will likely add up. Upon being released, my hope is to be able to bring his girls to see him. If the kids and I do go, it’ll be nearly $500 just for our flights not including anything else. It’s going on 7 weeks that he hasn’t been able to hold, hug or kiss his kids. Them being able to see their dad and visa versa would mean the world to all of us. We’re hoping to go even for a couple of days as life continues.

I am beyond thankful for everyone who contributed in relieving some of the financial stress. It’s been an emotional roller coaster of events these last weeks. Not having to stress as much for our bills (Jan-Mar) has been a major weight taken off my shoulders. I appreciate the support you all have given us thus far & am praying everything will work out in one way or another.

I will also be continuing to send our kids to child care for the next some weeks to allow Alan the chance to better recover.

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I didn’t wanna have to do this but this past month has been full of things I didn’t wanna have to do. I’m just pushing through anyways.

Jan. 16th Alan went to the ER and tested positive for COVID. His symptoms were so bad. We had him isolate for a week following that to ensure none of us caught it from him, which luckily we did not. The day after isolating, he couldn’t breathe. I called the paramedics who then informed us that his lung collapsed from coughing (air bubbles in his lungs, usually seen in covid patients). They immediately stuck some tube in his lungs. At first he was in extreme pain which then calmed down. They also suspected he might have TB. He couldn’t see his kids because of that but was allowed to see me for the short times I could find someone to watch our kids. After being cleared (3 negative tests), Kauai Medical Clinic said he cannot see his kids because he had Covid. They wanted him to isolate for 21 days. Mind you, another doc cleared him 2 days after testing positive because he had already been sick. We only had him isolate the extra week to be safe plus he was already in ICU for a week at that point. On Feb. 1st he was transferred to Straub Hospital in Oahu to do a procedure where they go in thru his throat to put valves in his lungs to stop/slow the leaks. That helped but did not resolve the problem.

While in the hospital they discovered other health issues as well. He has 2 different kinds of pneumonia which will require antibiotic treatment for months and a really bad lung disease (holes in his lungs). In addition, he was having to take insulin for diabetes which has since been determined his ‘diabetes’ was in fact because of the regular steroids they had him on. And now he has something called non-tuberculosis (non-TB/NTB). It’s a cousin of TB but it’s NOT contagious. These are just some of the health problems but there is more.

With some weeks spent in the hospital, we finally thought everything started going in the right direction. Then, on Sat. Feb. 10th, he called me early in the morning panicking as his other lung had collapsed. I scrambled to fly up there which ended up being one of the most expensive flights I’ve ever paid to Oahu (for the day). It was $300 and luckily I got the last seat on the last flight coming home + Uber prices were double what it normally was due to time of day. I would take his girls to see him but kids under 12 are under no circumstances allowed to visit So we pray he makes it out of there.

At this point, he’s had tubes in each lung and they’re wanting to do the same procedure on the other side. However, both docs that do this procedure are on vacation till 2/20 which they were not supposed to do. Queens hospital has no bed space to do it so we’re stuck waiting. Meanwhile, I’ve had to pay/figure our bills for Jan, Feb and likely will have to do the same for March. I haven’t had consistent childcare so haven’t been able to go to work like normal. Yesterday was their first day at an actual childcare but after I pay that expense I barely make anything. Not enough to pay our bills and that’s after I cancelled/reduce some things.

I’ve been trying to apply for financial help but nothing has actually been approved as of now. We don’t qualify TANF even as a family of 5 because they don’t count rent or any bills as an expense. I’m basically stuck. I’ve lost out on job opportunities because my avail sucks with all this going on. His mom can’t help because she’s still recovering from her lung collapsing right before his did. This is just some of it but on top of everything, we’ve had soooo many other challenges that are out of the norm. Our life is a mess.

Everything hit like a tidal wave of health and other life problems. I’m trying to carry the financial and emotional load on my own with myself, 3 kids (12, 2 and 5 months old) taking care of my bills, his bills and the bills we shared but I honestly don’t even know how much longer he’ll be gone. And when he finally does return home it’ll surely be a road to recover. I doubt he’ll be able to return to his job as a mechanic lifting tires anytime soon.

If everything goes smoothly with no issues then MAYBE the beginning of March he can come home but we just don’t know. Every time frame of when he’d be home has been absolutely shattered by more bad news.

In trying to supplement his income, I’ve used almost all my vacation for work. He was considered self employed so that had its own challenges/lack of benefits. Prior to this he was healthy. We never expected all this to come about, especially not so many things at once.

We’re doing what we have to and trying to get by without him. It’s just been so long and having no end date in sight proves even more stressful. This situation is weighing so heavy on our girls, him, myself and our entire family. Any help we can get during this is appreciated beyond what I alone can express. ❤️‍ Thank you.