I Have End Stage Kidney Disease Now

Hello, i really need help, because i am in daily agony and i am deathly afraid that i will have a heart attack or stroke, or both, if i am not able to move soon.

I'm a 59 year old Autistic adult, and i am suffering way beyond what i can bear because of where i have to live----and my declining health.

I was recently hospitalized for almost a month, from June 16 to July 4, 2018, and have been on dialysis now a year, due to end stage kidney failure.

I am now housebound due to my declining physical health, and have been forced to live stuck in a neighborhood for the past 30-plus years where i have had to endure deliberate almost daily torment from mean grown up bullies who work in three nearby businesses.

The police all know my situation full well, as do all of my neighbors here, yet the bullies still harass and torment me relentlessly by the very things they know that bring me severe sensory pain and hell. They do things such as: 

*Rev and gun their already loud vehicle's motors
*Yell at me, making loud animal noises and loud banshee style yells
*Blast their loud thunderous bass from their car stereos
*They will also lay on their car horns
*They will also call me horrible names, even the R word!

All of this causes me to have severe loud screaming meltdowns that literally make me physically sick and weak for days afterwards. And when this doesn't let up for days on end, which happens quite often, then i am left unable to function for weeks at a time.

I am deeply depressed all the time. I have only two in real life local friends--Amanda, but she works and is busy, and Connie, my friend who is once again my caregiver. I did have other caregivers this past year, because Connie had left me to take a job that had health benefits she could not turn down, but those caregivers were unreliable and abusive. That has only added to my daily agony, and yes, I have just had to the two current ones go, because the abuse was awful and in the end, could have put me in danger. Non of those caregivers had my back with the abusive neighbors, or have my back at all. They were always late, often getting me late to dialysis, and to other medical appointments. They were mentally, emotionally and financially abusive, and even took over the garage of my house, and my house itself, and me. None of them understood or got my autism, which only added to my agony.

If they should report this page for possible slander, the abuse is well-documented by my kidney center, the hospital i went to yesterday June 22, 2019 due to their neglect,  the local police, and another agency.

In addition? All of my siblings have turned their backs on me, moved out of state, and left me here, in this neighborhood, to fend for myself. Except for my mom and one nice sister---i do have their support--but they too now both live out of state, and i am unable to go live with them for financial reasons and climatic reasons, as they both live in hot states, and my mom has someone living in her house who will not allow me to move in with her.

I just have my Facebook friends, and  Connie to support me here in Santa Maria. But none of them can be here for me 24 hours a day.  And my Facebook friends all also live far away, most in the Northeastern part of the US.

I need much more than the $10,000 i am asking for, but this will be a start, so that i can work towards making a relocation to an area, whether it is a quiet neighborhood here in Santa Maria,  or preferably, my lifelong dream---to be able to live in Coastal New England, New York City, or the Washington DC area, as i have many Autistic/Disabled Community Facebook friends who live in those areas. I badly to get away from this toxic neighborhood, so that i can have my peace and life again. And move where i know i will have real supports, and lots of friends, and opportunities for actual peace and happiness.

I need much more than the $10,000 i am asking for because i am now also over $11,000 in debt.

I am so very unhappy. I now have nightmares every single night, and often cannot sleep. I am terrified now, of continuing to live where there are no real time supports for me. 

And especially now that i am in end stage kidney failure, and am on dialysis, i need to get away from here more than ever, because i honestly don't know how much longer i have on this earth.

I just want to be happy for the time i have left.

I hope you will please donate...any amount will help me to be able to finally be free of this never-ending hell. if you cannot help, please share this appeal far and wide.

I thank you in advance.

Here's a link to my latest blogs about my situation:




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Melissa Fields 
Santa Maria, CA
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