Please Help Give Me My Face Back

Hi my name is Hostgator Dotcom yes legally thats my name you see several years ago I was dealing with  undiagnosed Bi- Polar disorder. I had been dealing with it for many years but always figured it was just me being weak mentally and I had to be stronger.
I would go from one job to the next I eventually got a good job at the post office. I eventually got laid off when the economy got bad. It was then that my family and I got an eviction notice. I have 5 children that are my life. I didnt have anyone I could barrow money from. I didnt have enough time to get a new job before the eviction took place. All I could think about night and day was I could not allow my family to be homeless. I also knew no matter what I would not do anything illegal. As time grew shorter to my family being homeless I became more desperate. I eventually thought of an idea that had worked for me in the past. Several years before this I had read about a lady dying of kidney faliure. I sold advertising space on my back to finance my trip to California where I donated a kidney to someone in need.

I decided that selling advertising space on my body might be the only way to keep my kids off the street. I began emailing websites night and day I emailed. Most were not interested. The ones that were wanted to advertise on my face. My face I thought? It was a very hard choice probly a choice I wouldnt make today now that I am in recovery from Bi Polar but at the time I thought I had to sacrifice for my children. My parents sacrificed for me I thought so it was something I had to do for mine.
I sold advertising space on my face it kept my kids off the street for that month but what about the next month?
I tried to look for jobs but now with a tattoo on my face who would hire me? the answer no one would even though I have no criminal record our society sees a person with a tattoo on the face and automatically they must be a criminal.
This got me on a treadmill in order to keep my kids and family off the street another month I had to sell another advertisement and another and another it was a horrible cycle.
It got to the point where I was covered in tattoo advertisements as I am today.
I had hit rock bottom I was happy my kids were not homeless but every time I looked in the mirror I cried who had I become? Every time I went outside everyone looked at me like I was a monster. Although I felt I was far from a monster although not a perfect person I have tried to be as good a person as I can having donated 25 gallons of platlets at the blood bank for no money just to help donated a kidney donated bone marrow and volunteering around the community. Why was everyone looking at me like I was a murderer I thought? I was so down and depressed. We eventually did become homeless.  I got to a point where I thought about dying but I kept thinking of my kids and decided I wouldnt give up but that I did need help thats when I made an appointment with a mental health provider. I was diagnosed with Bi-polar rapid Cycling disorder. I started taking an anti depressent and something for my anxiety as it was hard going anywhere with everyone giving me mean loooks.
I started to get better slowly but better none the less. I went to see a therepist as well. I continued to get better. I even got a job as a courier at the mental health facility that I was getting help at delivering their inner office mail. Now that I had a job I was able to keep my family from being  homeless again. I continued in my recovery and eventually got a job as a peer support specialist at the same mental health facility that I went to for help. I used my own expierince with my mental illness to help others to their own recovery. Each step in my recovery gave me more hope more hope for the future I could give my family and more hope that I could be the person I used to want to be before the tattoos. I continue to work in the mental health field helping others with their mental illness. I hope to become a councilor one day the only thing standing in my way is the tattoos and my name. I have a clean background no criminal record. If I can get my tattoos removed and change my name back to my birth name Billy Gibby then I can go after my dreams again and be the person I know I can be for me and for my children.
I appreciate any help any amount helps
thank you for reading my story
Here are some stories about me that the anchorage press did on me you might like to read as well.

How Mental illness drove a man to sell his own face