Help X/Alix and z Start New Lives
Donation protected
Z and X (formerly known as Alix) have been partners and living on Takelma land in "Southern Oregon" for six years. They have helped create multiple spaces for rural queer community in the area, most notably Muffintop Mountain for the last 3 years. Alix has been chronically ill for many years, and has been uncovering more pieces of the puzzle especially over the last few years. Last week, we recognized the severity of the mold toxicity at Muffintop and have had to leave our home. The space that we have worked so hard to live our dreams and share with others is no longer an option for us to live at. We are homeless and have used up money and points at hotels, and need to go to the only non moldy and free place to live available to us: Z’s parents home in south suburban Chicago.
We are in URGENT need of funds and or hotel points to be able to drive across the country. please paypal: [email redacted] or Venmo @zi-zi-zi . Or if you want, you can text us and go to US Bank and deposit directly into my account.
Read below for the full update about Alix’s health crisis, this past month, and looking forward.
Hello, this is X speaking and Z typing. Today (Jan 5th) I was finally able to look at the internet and see some of the support that people have been offering through this medium and it’s very powerful. Thank you SO SO Much to everyone who has offered well wishes and financial support. It has allowed me to continue going and the people offering me direct support to focus on my body and my healing process.
I need to dispel some of the information that has been put out about what has happened.
Many of you know that my health worsened at the end of the summer in conjunction with a large solar storm that resulted in major loss of my shoulder and arm function. I know several other trans people who experienced similar degeneration at the same exact time. Sensitivity and health issues related to electromagnetic radiation is REAL.
My current health crisis did not start with hitting my head on November 13th; it started when the trans woman who I’ve been friends with for the longest, Emma Deboncoeur, died on March 13th. It started when I went to her memorial and saw hundreds of people show up to celebrate her life and memorialize her death, who were NOT there for her to help her stay alive.
A year ago, I did an intensive parasite cleanse with the support of z and Melissa at Muffintop Mountain. The only allopathic support that I received was offering anti parasitic medication which did far more harm to me than good. After this cleanse, I felt better than I had in YEARS. I successfully rid myself of parasitic bacteria, protozoa, and worms that had been infecting my body for over two decades. But because of the medication that I took and the moldy environment that I was unknowingly living in, fungus took over my GI tract. In addition, at the immediate end of this cleanse, I had to move to my work place in order to keep my business alive. This meant literally sleeping on top of a circuit breaker box that was pumping electromagnetic energy up my right leg and hip, unknown to me. I believe that dormant herpes viruses living in my nerve roots have been feeding off of this energy, as well as the psychological trauma for the course of the entire year.
Six weeks later, Emma died. I remember the week I was in Oakland at her memorial, despite the extreme grief, that my motor skills and GI function were still the best they’ve been in many years. Subsequently, the grief and psychological trauma continued as would be expected. I moved back to Muffintop, this time with my RV right next to the main house, not knowing that it was the source of the toxic mold that had been inhibiting my health for the three years prior. (Some of you may remember that within six weeks of moving to Muffintop in 2015 I became very ill.) As my physical health degraded, due to the mold, my psychological health also worsened rather than improving. In July I moved back to the junkyard to sleep on top of the power box that was also killing me.
After losing most of my shoulder and arm function on August 27th, my partner z moved to the junkyard and started working at my business in order to help me survive. I reached out for additional support as widely as I could, and received not enough. The emotional and mental burden of this has been an extraordinary weight on both of us, as we have fought hard against codependency and coupledom (a very difficult task in an isolated rural environment.) That summer, z had started introducing more starches and sugars into their diet after sharing a low starch diet with me for over a year. This reintroduced candida to my body. Additionally, they were coming and going from Muffintop and bringing mold spores with them. This fall I experienced additional physical degeneration after additional solar storms, which feed solar energy into the power grid (an acknowledged fact by the USGS).
After all of these burdens, z and I began planning to leave southern Oregon to move to a rural location outside either Seattle or San Francisco in order to receive more social and medical support. Doing so brought on a lot of fears and trauma about the past that were difficult to process in the highly toxic environment that we were living in, and with my complicated health issues. Two months ago, thanks to my EMF reader, I learned of the high levels the level of electromagnetic energy that had been pumping into my body via the circuit breaker box under my bed for most of the year.
I moved out of that grid-saturated motor home into z’s tiny 18 foot trailer with them. The additional burdens that this placed on us individually and on our relationship were huge. After a long night of processing the psychological trauma related to these burdens, we went to the hot tub to try to release them. Unfortunately, the hot tub water itself was also highly electrified. After soaking in the tub, I sat up on the edge, turned my head to the right to get my towel, and blacked out, falling backwards and hitting my head. This was a MINOR concussion, that so happened to be the same place injured when I was attacked in 2005 (see P.S. for history.) For the following week, my physical and mental function was hardly affected by this fall and injury.
A week later, I got into the hot tub again, very late at night, hours after I would normally be asleep. Unfortunately, this happened to be during another solar storm. This time, when I got out of the hot tub, I had lost stability around L1 in my spine and it was a huge struggle to walk the thousand feet with z’s support back to the tiny trailer. Two days later, we found out about the solar storm and decided to move out of z’s aluminum trailer with electric heat into the motorhome that I had been living in for three years prior with wood heat and without an electrical connection to the grid. That RV is full of mold from shoddy construction and infection by Muffintop. Moving into that toxic mold environment is what made my health far worse. Because of the way information about this situation was spread, it seems that the public knowledge about my health is skewed towards emphasizing my physical head injury. It’s more about psychological trauma and environmental toxicity. Here’s some evidence to support that…
A week and a half ago, while in low EMF and high mold environment with insufficient direct support, it was unclear to me if I would ever:
-live on grid again
-walk again
-use a cell phone or computer again
-have “normal” brain function again
-be able to run my business again
It’s now been one week since leaving Moldytop Mountain. The only “medical” care that I have received during that time has been care that I ALREADY knew how to provide for myself. I would like to celebrate the success that my self care routines with assistance from z and others, and a less toxic environment have provided for me:
- I have more shoulder and arm function than I did FOUR MONTHS AGO.
- Parts of my GI system are working better than they were six months ago.
- The swelling and pain in the back of my head is decreasing every day
- I can walk, ride a stationary bike, dance, and hop across a creek, with the primary obstacle being the stiffness in my legs from barely using them for a month.
- I am slowly engaging more and more with electrical devices, while living in a space with electric heat and wifi and cell phones all around me. (Yes, they are still hurting me, but my body can dissipate their energy.)
- I can have long logistical conversations, such as dictating this and planning next steps for my life.
- I can perform self care tasks such as some simple cooking, carrying things around, sorting my pills, making medicine, that were difficult for me three months ago.
I have a HUGE HUGE amount of gratitude and love for the people who have offered me direct care during this time and kept me from the allopathic vampires that others tried to push me towards. Without Michael my caregiver, and z, I might be dead or in a mental institution, rather than ridding my body of the parasites that took it over, the way that I KNOW HOW. I also have an enormous amount of love and gratitude to the people who have shown up to peripheral care. I have heavy appreciation for the financial support, love, and well wishes from afar. Thank you, thank you, thank you. I am alive, and I am here, thanks to all of you.
I also am deeply saddened by the lack of belief and physical support that I have been offered during this time. It does not come as a surprise to me, because of what I saw with Emma, and I appreciate the reality that her death showed me.
After twenty five years of living on the west coast, I am leaving in four days in large part due to lack of support that I have received through this crisis. I will be going through Portland to receive allopathic diagnostics that I will carry with me to my temporary home outside Chicago. There, I plan to reshape my business, and provide myself and employees with private health insurance, so that I am no longer dependent on the state health care that nearly killed me. In order for this plan to work, I am in strong need of financial investment in my business, and donations to help with moving costs.
I would like to note that financial investment in my business can be profitable for you, and is not simply a request for assistance, although it is much needed at this time because I have barely been able to work for over four months.
In addition, I need physical logistical support in southern Oregon to help close out my life here, including help selling the huge amount of assets that I own. If you can help with that at all, please contact z.
If you are available to come visit and help with direct care in Chicago, that would be welcome! I will be more able to care for my needs but still need help, and giving z a break is my #1 priority.
I have an INCREDIBLE amount of belief and hope for my ability to heal my body and recover my life from this crisis. But I cannot do so without more external support. This is very scary to me, because lack of support is what precipitated this crisis. I know that I have pushed people away consciously and subconsciously because of my battles with trans misogyny and ableism. For those of you who have felt the impact of this, please know that I have been pushing you out open doors which I never meant to close, and would love for you to walk back through those doors to me, into my open arms.
Lastly, I would like to note that my own attempts to share my limited resources with other trans grrls and disabled queer people also lead to this crisis. I will not stop doing that EVER, I have no desire to stop. I have every intention of continuing to build my capacity to support highly impacted two spirit trans and disabled queer people, and cis nondisabled BIPOC accomplices. I had been working on slowly building another project called Nourishing Transitions to focus on “healing” work for those of us that need it the most and plan to continue slowly building that from my center outwards. I believe in me. And I hope that you do too.
With big GAY love forever,
X.P. Shedd
P.S. here is the history of when I became disabled, though through my internalized ableism and that of everyone around me, it took me ten years to recognize.
TW: physical assault.
In 2005 I left my low paying job at a worker owned collective café, my first “business owner” experience, and started a higher paying job pretending to be a boy doing data entry processing donations for hurricane Katrina. I did this in order to save money to start a worker owned diner/bar, which I thought at the time would be my much-needed job security as a trans woman. Shortly after starting, I was attacked by a large cis white man in a road rage incident while with my friend Yaga. This disgusting human being grabbed my left shoulder and tore me to the ground. He then grabbed the front of my bike helmet and repeatedly lifted and bashed my head into the pavement. This serious head and neck injury debilitated my ability to function at my job without extreme pain. I continued to do so anyway because of the dream of future stability that I needed due to extremely limited other options. (Yes, I’ve been fired for being trans.) A month later, I had a severe outbreak of roundworms and took heavy anti parasitics, worsening my already unhealthy guts. A few weeks later, half of the diner/bar collective bailed on the project, collapsing most of my hope in queer collective projects. A few weeks after that, I was fired because I was physically unable to work forty hours a week while also seeking medical care. Physical trauma, trans misogyny, and ableism, very quickly, at the age of 23. With my gut health worsening very quickly.
After this, I began what later became apocalypse vintage, which meant working with a large amount of old, aka MOLDY, clothing, which I proceeded to do for the next five years.
The following April, I started hormone replacement therapy. At the time, there was very limited information for trans women starting HRT. (remember what the internet was like back then?) and practitioners knew barely more than we did—many now know less than we do. I was started on spironolactone, which drained essential electrolytes (sodium, magnesium, calcium) out of my body, damaging my adrenal glands and allowing parasites to take over further. I was also prescribed estradiol injections every two weeks (now they prescribe them every 3 to 7 days) which heavily taxed my endocrine system and my liver. I was on this HRT regimen for the next ten years. I started this at a “trans health” clinic and I had multiple “trans health” practitioners keep me on this regimen. Until I realized how damaging this was to my health and I stopped it on my own. These past few years I have been tirelessly working to change the patterns that this terrible care and lack of support have done to my body, mind, heart, and spirit while also managing and building a business so that I can support myself, and managing and building a land project, so that I can receive and offer support with my peers. I have done all this with inadequate support from family and friends. I am now starting a whole new life, being forced to leave my home, but still carrying the same gifts and burdens. If you want to be a part of this new life, that means receiving my gifts and helping to carry these burdens along with me. That is the only way.
P.P.S. I cannot underestimate the importance that three particular treatments have had in my healing process. Number one: ENEMAS. Everyone should be flushing the abundant toxicity from our environment through their large intestines, the largest portion of our lymphatic system, the gateway to our liver, and the drainage for our GI tract.
Number two: Frequency Specific Microcurrent (frequencyspecific.com). This is an electro therapy machine that uses minute amounts of current (millionths of an amp) directed towards specific tissues in specific ways. It is energy medicine like reiki or sound healing, combined with over 100 years of biology and physics.
Number three: Colloidal silver, which is silver particles suspended in water. Silver is highly antiparasitic to all microbial life while also healing the cells in our own bodies.
And of course, with any flushing or killing must come regeneration: I have been supporting my micro/myco biome with eating living (fermented foods) and beverages and taking probiotic supplements.
We are in URGENT need of funds and or hotel points to be able to drive across the country. please paypal: [email redacted] or Venmo @zi-zi-zi . Or if you want, you can text us and go to US Bank and deposit directly into my account.
Read below for the full update about Alix’s health crisis, this past month, and looking forward.
Hello, this is X speaking and Z typing. Today (Jan 5th) I was finally able to look at the internet and see some of the support that people have been offering through this medium and it’s very powerful. Thank you SO SO Much to everyone who has offered well wishes and financial support. It has allowed me to continue going and the people offering me direct support to focus on my body and my healing process.
I need to dispel some of the information that has been put out about what has happened.
Many of you know that my health worsened at the end of the summer in conjunction with a large solar storm that resulted in major loss of my shoulder and arm function. I know several other trans people who experienced similar degeneration at the same exact time. Sensitivity and health issues related to electromagnetic radiation is REAL.
My current health crisis did not start with hitting my head on November 13th; it started when the trans woman who I’ve been friends with for the longest, Emma Deboncoeur, died on March 13th. It started when I went to her memorial and saw hundreds of people show up to celebrate her life and memorialize her death, who were NOT there for her to help her stay alive.
A year ago, I did an intensive parasite cleanse with the support of z and Melissa at Muffintop Mountain. The only allopathic support that I received was offering anti parasitic medication which did far more harm to me than good. After this cleanse, I felt better than I had in YEARS. I successfully rid myself of parasitic bacteria, protozoa, and worms that had been infecting my body for over two decades. But because of the medication that I took and the moldy environment that I was unknowingly living in, fungus took over my GI tract. In addition, at the immediate end of this cleanse, I had to move to my work place in order to keep my business alive. This meant literally sleeping on top of a circuit breaker box that was pumping electromagnetic energy up my right leg and hip, unknown to me. I believe that dormant herpes viruses living in my nerve roots have been feeding off of this energy, as well as the psychological trauma for the course of the entire year.
Six weeks later, Emma died. I remember the week I was in Oakland at her memorial, despite the extreme grief, that my motor skills and GI function were still the best they’ve been in many years. Subsequently, the grief and psychological trauma continued as would be expected. I moved back to Muffintop, this time with my RV right next to the main house, not knowing that it was the source of the toxic mold that had been inhibiting my health for the three years prior. (Some of you may remember that within six weeks of moving to Muffintop in 2015 I became very ill.) As my physical health degraded, due to the mold, my psychological health also worsened rather than improving. In July I moved back to the junkyard to sleep on top of the power box that was also killing me.
After losing most of my shoulder and arm function on August 27th, my partner z moved to the junkyard and started working at my business in order to help me survive. I reached out for additional support as widely as I could, and received not enough. The emotional and mental burden of this has been an extraordinary weight on both of us, as we have fought hard against codependency and coupledom (a very difficult task in an isolated rural environment.) That summer, z had started introducing more starches and sugars into their diet after sharing a low starch diet with me for over a year. This reintroduced candida to my body. Additionally, they were coming and going from Muffintop and bringing mold spores with them. This fall I experienced additional physical degeneration after additional solar storms, which feed solar energy into the power grid (an acknowledged fact by the USGS).
After all of these burdens, z and I began planning to leave southern Oregon to move to a rural location outside either Seattle or San Francisco in order to receive more social and medical support. Doing so brought on a lot of fears and trauma about the past that were difficult to process in the highly toxic environment that we were living in, and with my complicated health issues. Two months ago, thanks to my EMF reader, I learned of the high levels the level of electromagnetic energy that had been pumping into my body via the circuit breaker box under my bed for most of the year.
I moved out of that grid-saturated motor home into z’s tiny 18 foot trailer with them. The additional burdens that this placed on us individually and on our relationship were huge. After a long night of processing the psychological trauma related to these burdens, we went to the hot tub to try to release them. Unfortunately, the hot tub water itself was also highly electrified. After soaking in the tub, I sat up on the edge, turned my head to the right to get my towel, and blacked out, falling backwards and hitting my head. This was a MINOR concussion, that so happened to be the same place injured when I was attacked in 2005 (see P.S. for history.) For the following week, my physical and mental function was hardly affected by this fall and injury.
A week later, I got into the hot tub again, very late at night, hours after I would normally be asleep. Unfortunately, this happened to be during another solar storm. This time, when I got out of the hot tub, I had lost stability around L1 in my spine and it was a huge struggle to walk the thousand feet with z’s support back to the tiny trailer. Two days later, we found out about the solar storm and decided to move out of z’s aluminum trailer with electric heat into the motorhome that I had been living in for three years prior with wood heat and without an electrical connection to the grid. That RV is full of mold from shoddy construction and infection by Muffintop. Moving into that toxic mold environment is what made my health far worse. Because of the way information about this situation was spread, it seems that the public knowledge about my health is skewed towards emphasizing my physical head injury. It’s more about psychological trauma and environmental toxicity. Here’s some evidence to support that…
A week and a half ago, while in low EMF and high mold environment with insufficient direct support, it was unclear to me if I would ever:
-live on grid again
-walk again
-use a cell phone or computer again
-have “normal” brain function again
-be able to run my business again
It’s now been one week since leaving Moldytop Mountain. The only “medical” care that I have received during that time has been care that I ALREADY knew how to provide for myself. I would like to celebrate the success that my self care routines with assistance from z and others, and a less toxic environment have provided for me:
- I have more shoulder and arm function than I did FOUR MONTHS AGO.
- Parts of my GI system are working better than they were six months ago.
- The swelling and pain in the back of my head is decreasing every day
- I can walk, ride a stationary bike, dance, and hop across a creek, with the primary obstacle being the stiffness in my legs from barely using them for a month.
- I am slowly engaging more and more with electrical devices, while living in a space with electric heat and wifi and cell phones all around me. (Yes, they are still hurting me, but my body can dissipate their energy.)
- I can have long logistical conversations, such as dictating this and planning next steps for my life.
- I can perform self care tasks such as some simple cooking, carrying things around, sorting my pills, making medicine, that were difficult for me three months ago.
I have a HUGE HUGE amount of gratitude and love for the people who have offered me direct care during this time and kept me from the allopathic vampires that others tried to push me towards. Without Michael my caregiver, and z, I might be dead or in a mental institution, rather than ridding my body of the parasites that took it over, the way that I KNOW HOW. I also have an enormous amount of love and gratitude to the people who have shown up to peripheral care. I have heavy appreciation for the financial support, love, and well wishes from afar. Thank you, thank you, thank you. I am alive, and I am here, thanks to all of you.
I also am deeply saddened by the lack of belief and physical support that I have been offered during this time. It does not come as a surprise to me, because of what I saw with Emma, and I appreciate the reality that her death showed me.
After twenty five years of living on the west coast, I am leaving in four days in large part due to lack of support that I have received through this crisis. I will be going through Portland to receive allopathic diagnostics that I will carry with me to my temporary home outside Chicago. There, I plan to reshape my business, and provide myself and employees with private health insurance, so that I am no longer dependent on the state health care that nearly killed me. In order for this plan to work, I am in strong need of financial investment in my business, and donations to help with moving costs.
I would like to note that financial investment in my business can be profitable for you, and is not simply a request for assistance, although it is much needed at this time because I have barely been able to work for over four months.
In addition, I need physical logistical support in southern Oregon to help close out my life here, including help selling the huge amount of assets that I own. If you can help with that at all, please contact z.
If you are available to come visit and help with direct care in Chicago, that would be welcome! I will be more able to care for my needs but still need help, and giving z a break is my #1 priority.
I have an INCREDIBLE amount of belief and hope for my ability to heal my body and recover my life from this crisis. But I cannot do so without more external support. This is very scary to me, because lack of support is what precipitated this crisis. I know that I have pushed people away consciously and subconsciously because of my battles with trans misogyny and ableism. For those of you who have felt the impact of this, please know that I have been pushing you out open doors which I never meant to close, and would love for you to walk back through those doors to me, into my open arms.
Lastly, I would like to note that my own attempts to share my limited resources with other trans grrls and disabled queer people also lead to this crisis. I will not stop doing that EVER, I have no desire to stop. I have every intention of continuing to build my capacity to support highly impacted two spirit trans and disabled queer people, and cis nondisabled BIPOC accomplices. I had been working on slowly building another project called Nourishing Transitions to focus on “healing” work for those of us that need it the most and plan to continue slowly building that from my center outwards. I believe in me. And I hope that you do too.
With big GAY love forever,
X.P. Shedd
P.S. here is the history of when I became disabled, though through my internalized ableism and that of everyone around me, it took me ten years to recognize.
TW: physical assault.
In 2005 I left my low paying job at a worker owned collective café, my first “business owner” experience, and started a higher paying job pretending to be a boy doing data entry processing donations for hurricane Katrina. I did this in order to save money to start a worker owned diner/bar, which I thought at the time would be my much-needed job security as a trans woman. Shortly after starting, I was attacked by a large cis white man in a road rage incident while with my friend Yaga. This disgusting human being grabbed my left shoulder and tore me to the ground. He then grabbed the front of my bike helmet and repeatedly lifted and bashed my head into the pavement. This serious head and neck injury debilitated my ability to function at my job without extreme pain. I continued to do so anyway because of the dream of future stability that I needed due to extremely limited other options. (Yes, I’ve been fired for being trans.) A month later, I had a severe outbreak of roundworms and took heavy anti parasitics, worsening my already unhealthy guts. A few weeks later, half of the diner/bar collective bailed on the project, collapsing most of my hope in queer collective projects. A few weeks after that, I was fired because I was physically unable to work forty hours a week while also seeking medical care. Physical trauma, trans misogyny, and ableism, very quickly, at the age of 23. With my gut health worsening very quickly.
After this, I began what later became apocalypse vintage, which meant working with a large amount of old, aka MOLDY, clothing, which I proceeded to do for the next five years.
The following April, I started hormone replacement therapy. At the time, there was very limited information for trans women starting HRT. (remember what the internet was like back then?) and practitioners knew barely more than we did—many now know less than we do. I was started on spironolactone, which drained essential electrolytes (sodium, magnesium, calcium) out of my body, damaging my adrenal glands and allowing parasites to take over further. I was also prescribed estradiol injections every two weeks (now they prescribe them every 3 to 7 days) which heavily taxed my endocrine system and my liver. I was on this HRT regimen for the next ten years. I started this at a “trans health” clinic and I had multiple “trans health” practitioners keep me on this regimen. Until I realized how damaging this was to my health and I stopped it on my own. These past few years I have been tirelessly working to change the patterns that this terrible care and lack of support have done to my body, mind, heart, and spirit while also managing and building a business so that I can support myself, and managing and building a land project, so that I can receive and offer support with my peers. I have done all this with inadequate support from family and friends. I am now starting a whole new life, being forced to leave my home, but still carrying the same gifts and burdens. If you want to be a part of this new life, that means receiving my gifts and helping to carry these burdens along with me. That is the only way.
P.P.S. I cannot underestimate the importance that three particular treatments have had in my healing process. Number one: ENEMAS. Everyone should be flushing the abundant toxicity from our environment through their large intestines, the largest portion of our lymphatic system, the gateway to our liver, and the drainage for our GI tract.
Number two: Frequency Specific Microcurrent (frequencyspecific.com). This is an electro therapy machine that uses minute amounts of current (millionths of an amp) directed towards specific tissues in specific ways. It is energy medicine like reiki or sound healing, combined with over 100 years of biology and physics.
Number three: Colloidal silver, which is silver particles suspended in water. Silver is highly antiparasitic to all microbial life while also healing the cells in our own bodies.
And of course, with any flushing or killing must come regeneration: I have been supporting my micro/myco biome with eating living (fermented foods) and beverages and taking probiotic supplements.
Organizer
Alix P. Shedd
Organizer
Wolf Creek, OR
