Skye's PTSD Service Dog
Trying to heal from childhood sexual abuse.
Hello friend!
My name is Skylar, and I guess you want to know a little bit more. Before I say anything though, I want to say thank you for taking some of your valuable time to read this, and spare a thought for me and my situation. That already means so much!
When I was younger, I went through a lot of things that I wouldn’t wish on my worst enemy, and as a result of that, I suffer from PTSD. I have flashbacks, panic attacks, and I find myself in periods of dissociation… My mind basically leaves my body and I have no concept of the world around me, on the flip side though, I also deal with periods of extreme hyper vigilance. Everything around me becomes crystal clear and it feels like I’m being compressed and crushed by every blinding detail. I can’t concentrate… My train of thought derails almost before it begins, and it has left me at a point where sometimes it makes me want to tear my hair out. I feel lost, confused, hopeless… gone.
At night, it’s worse. Drawn out by the darkness and the quiet, everything is amplified and I lose sleep. A cycle that often drives me to the edge of sanity. The more tired I become, the more intense my symptoms are, and the more likely I am to suffer an emotional breakdown. There’s even an alarm on my front door in case I dissociate and try to leave the house. In the past, I’ve been found completely unaware and wandering down the middle of a road.
There are days where I can barely breathe. I can’t leave my home, or my bedroom, because every inch outside my front door terrifies me. I feel trapped by my condition, and the idea of moving beyond the confines of my home sends me into a panic. I can’t turn it off. I wish I could, but it’s never that simple.
Counselling and medication help, but even with those combined efforts, they’re just a drop in the ocean for me. They’re not solutions. They ease my burdens, but they can’t erase what I deal with.
I don’t want to live like that. With the efforts of this GoFundMe page, I want to be free of it. I want to be independent, strong… I want to be me again. I want to take the power out of the hands of my abusers and my condition, and award it back to myself. One day, I hope to go further, and start a refuge and charity centre for victims of abuse. A safe space, a sanctuary. It’s a case of baby steps though.
There is a silver lining though. With donations I was able to get a dog to train. Unfortunately she did not pass her testing and we are now in search of a new potential.
If you can spare anything at all, I want you to know you’re changing a life. Even if you just stuck around to hear my story and for a moment sit with your heart going out to me, with pride, or sympathy… For just caring for even a moment, thank you.
