#LoganKoesterSTRONG

No words can describe the hurt, anger, sadness, worry, fear and stress the last 24 hours have been. No parent ever thinks their baby will ever have to endure the hardships cancer being. He is only 4 he shouldn’t be lying in this bed sleeping off the sedation he had to have to run some more test. He should be at home bouncing off the walls like he always does and pestering his brothers and sister. He shouldn’t be here terrified and scared of doctors and nurses wondering what else they are going to do to him. I should be able to hold my baby boy without being scared to touch him because I might hurt him. Hearing him scream and cry in pain and fear has probably been the worst moments of my life. Not being able to console him without sedation was even worse. Logan is the toughest boy around and everybody who knows him would say the same thing. He is fearless, tough, kind hearted, such a sweetheart, and lights up everybody’s day. The type of leukemia Logan has is the best of the types there are. They are very positive about this next year and once we beat this it shouldn’t ever come back. Logan will have to spend at least the next month at primary’s to receive his treatments and medications and hopefully after that he can come home with us. I have no idea how we are going to make this next month work or how to even go without seeing the boys or Norah all the time. It is tearing me up inside. We have an amazing support system from our friends and family and we won’t be able to make it through this without them. I am going to try and not cry the rest of the night and just watch my baby sleep peacefully and hopefully feel ten times better in the morning. #cancersucks #whymybaby #wewillbeatthis #toughestboyalive