Kyle's Cancer Battle Continues :(

I'd like to thank everyone who is reading this message because regardless of what brought you here, it means you have interest and empathy for my story and I genuinely appreciate that. My name is Kyle, I'm a 28 year old college graduate from Arizona State University, I'm a crazy dog person, and I'm fighting an aggressive form of bone cancer medically described as chondroblastic osteogenic sarcoma. Today has been an especially rough day, as I've unfortunately found out that in addition to a bone marrow transplant, I require a series of lengthy, painful, and expensive treatments. My prognosis has been updated to be very grim, and without these treatments I've been told I will die within the next few months.

I've been fighting this battle for a substantial amount of time as this point. It has been an exhausting and torrentially emotional road. A massively difficult journey that has taken every ounce of my physical, mental, and spiritual fortitude to continue. There have been moments where my mindset has been so holistically defeated by the pain I have experienced these past months where I've prayed for any possible way out of my circumstances... but my incredible network of close friends and extended family have lifted me back up and supported me through this onerous struggle of a cancer battle. I'm beyond fighting this battle by myself or surviving for myself. I'm pushing forward because I have been extremely lucky and thankful to learn that there are many people who love me, and my perseverance is directly conducive towards living for those amazing people in my life and to be able to eclipse this chapter of my story and make new, happy, and positive memories with the ones I care about.

My particular case of osteosarcoma has been massively and decisively complicated. The cancerous masses themselves are embedded in my thoracic and upper lumbar spinal column, have metastasized to my lymph nodes, and have proven to be a nightmare for any traditional form of chemotherapy. I have been exposed to nearly every cytotoxic and cytostatic medication compound that can be administered via infusion therapy and my affliction of cancer has stubbornly resisted a terrifyingly high percentage of treatment options. I'm not afraid to admit that I've spent many, many long nights either at home (when I haven't been able to fiscally afford the treatment I've needed and been scheduled for) soaking my pillows with tears because of the pain this illness has caused me, or at times laying in a hospital bed screaming louder than the burn victims in the trauma wing next to the oncology unit. This cancer battle - emotionally and physically - has been the single most difficult test of my entire life, which would seem obvious, however anyone who knows me personally is aware of the adversity I faced as a child and up through my teenage years; between my parents literally abandoning my younger siblings and I on the streets of the Phoenix metropolitan area because of their substance abuse problems, and living as a homeless kid (who had to grow up very quickly) up through my experience with the foster care system.

I don't share the above information with you to garner your sympathy or pity. I don't want to textually tug at anyone's heartstrings or receive any pats on the back for what I'm going through. I've said what I have because I want the chronology of my life to someday serve as an example for the inspiration of anyone else who is going through the things that I have. I want to beat this cancer diagnosis so far into remission that anyone else who has been tormented by this hellacious plague of a disease can maintain hope that a positive ending is in sight. I've been on the edge of giving up many times and I know how dark things can become, and I don't want that for anyone else.

I've fought this fight for so long that it can't all be for nothing. I refuse to succumb to this disease and let it win. Instead of a medical statistic, I want to be the man who stood past his long journey of adversity with the experience to help others through the difficult times in their own lives. I want to be known as the man who initially ignored his software engineering degree to begin a career in law enforcement because he desperately wanted to help people, or the insane animal person who spends his spare time at the humane society because he wants to show all those dogs and cats temporarily without a home the unconditional love that animals had shown him all of his life. Or maybe just be known as that one friend who is always there to listen to anyone and everyone who needs to be heard. That's how I want to be known... not remembered. I very truly believe its not my time to leave behind the people I care about and the world in which I don't yet feel I've done enough to change.

With all that being said (and if you've made it to this point I'd like to thank you again), I unfortunately can't accomplish any of the above without your help. And this is the portion of this message that I absolutely dreaded writing. My entire life I have been fiercely independent. I'm not sure if it's a result of the circumstances of my childhood and subsequent maturation that molded me into the self-reliant man I've become... but I hate asking for help. I've never really known the feeling of anxiety in the years prior to my cancer diagnosis but I'm pretty sure I'm experiencing it right now... I don't want to be the charity case that appears on anyone's timeline or newsfeed. I don't want to be an annoyance on social media or a burden to my friends, and I'm genuinely sorry because I know no one wants to see another GoFundMe page... but as I said above, this can't all be for nothing. I can't let cancer win. I just can't. And from all the support I've received from my large network of extended family and friends, I know they don't want cancer to win either. They're the reason I'm asking for your help. My friends, my dogs Avalanche and Fionn who mean EVERYTHING to me... they're who I want to live for. If there is any possible way you can help me by contributing, I will be FOREVER in your debt. If you're not able to monetarily assist my cancer battle, I completely understand and I appreciate you reading about my story and my situation. If you would be willing to share this campaign so that it might reach other people, that would be incredible as well.

Thank you for listening to me. I know that was long-winded and I appreciate the time you have taken to hear me out. I love you all, and I promise to keep pushing forward.

-Kyle