thank you for visiting and supporting our site. on july, 17 2013, my wife and i were laying in bed, she was typing on her laptop. i, being a guy, rolled over and copped a feel of her right breast, unbeknownst to me, the lump i found that night would change our lives and test our faith forever! stephanie works at a doctor's office, so the following day she had one of the physicians check it out. it was agreed on to wait for her next cycle and reexamine the lump, so three weeks past, the doctor reexamined it, it was at this point things got very real. it was a thursday, i've found you remember days like this, we had an appointment for the following tuesday, at the ellen shaw deparedes institute for women's imaging. this would become the longest day of our lives to this point. we got there at 9:30am, they took steph back for a baseline mammogram, two subsequent spot compressions and one more full mammogram. it was at this point they came and got me, the pit in my stomach felt like a mack truck! they said, we don't like what we see, we want to do many additional tests, can you come back tomorrow. i implored them, that due to the two hour drive, could they do the tests today. they called in another radiologist and we finally saw this faceless monster on the ultrasound screen. i stood holding her hand, trying to remain stoic, watching the doctors faces. then i saw it, the concern and the glance between them. i was fighting back tears. they told us they needed to biopsy this site immediately! the doctor asked me to step out with him, at which point he told me he didn't need the biopsy results to assure him that my wife, my best friend since sophomore year of highschool, indeed had breast cancer. for the next two and a half weeks we made the four hour round trip to richmond for test after test, with each one giving us news worse than the one before. stephanie used her vacation and sick time, i'm self employed, but had recently sold off part of my company. after countless more doctors visits, specialists, and 32 biopsies, we had to decide what kind of surgery. we opted to go very aggressive, in the hopes that we could circumvent any chemo therapy, radiation, or recurrence.
we met with surgeons, plastic surgeons, did research, looked at before and after pictures and finally decided on our surgeons, our type of reconstruction, hospital, etc. what seemed like an eternity, our surgery date arrived, october 22 became the longest day of my life. neither of us slept much the night before, she slept as long as i rubbed her head. i spent the night before praying and crying. she went in for her pre-op at 6am. i got to sit with her and we each tried our best to contain our tears. then it came, time to let her go. i kissed her so deeply, hugged her harder than i ever had. and i waited. waited, waited. it was a 10 hour surgery, it felt like a thousand.
her surgery went well, and i will detail it further in another post. we are now faced with the chemo we thought we could avoid by going so radical! we were told this past thursday, that because of her age, type of cancer, and its rapid rate of growth, that there is no protocol for her treatment. they said she has a 15% chance of it returning in the next ten years, but where it would return would be in her bones, her lungs, or her liver, neither of which is curable! our oncologist, who is highly regarded in his field has asked us to go to eight to ten other cancer hospitals to get other opinions! his thought on chemo, due to her age, was to use the strongest dose available, four doses over twelve weeks. he told us their is a high risk of blood clots, stroke, and death! he said that days after her first treatment she would be bald. our car broke a week after her surgery, we were lucky enough to get a different car, but the transmission went on that. we have had to rent a car for two weeks just so i can get her to her appointments in richmond. i just sold my work truck to get the transmission fixed. hopefully that will be done quickly! we have depleted all of our savings, have sold what we can, and some we couldn't afford to sell. we really need your help. please understand, we have two beautiful girls, six and seven, and i cannot imagine them not having their mommy around! we know that god never gives us more than we can handle, but truth be told, i'm running low on my faith. we need a boost. please help if you can. and to all of our female friends, please check your breasts!! you do not want the hell that is breast cancer!