Summer's Fund for Chronic Illness

Four years ago, I was just graduating high school. I was strong, ambitious, and driven. I’d written a killer Valedictorian speech, and won a prestigious full-ride scholarship to the University of Utah. I was ready to see my small-town childhood in my rearview mirror, and start my journey to a big, adventurous, full life in a world with endless opportunity. Now, it is 2015. Until a few months ago, I was Junior status at the University of Utah, studying to be a teacher for refugee students and English Language Learners. I volunteered in the mornings before class, and I worked part-time in the evenings.

Now, I can barely get out of bed most mornings. I wake up with crippling muscle pain, as a result of fibromyalgia. On my worst days, my legs buckle underneath me, and I have to hold onto the wall, or a chair, to stop myself from falling. I’m undernourished because of severe adult-onset food allergies and digestive distress. Every day, I suffer from stomach pain and discomfort, and some days, the pain is so severe that I cannot eat at all.


For three years, my illness progressed, and I found ways to manage the symptoms– restricted diets, lifestyle changes, pharmaceuticals, as well as homeopathic treatments. I’ve seen over fifteen doctors and specialists, and I’ve had a multitude of tests and procedures to help me get closer to a diagnosis and treatment plan. I currently use feeding tube, but am not able to take in enough nutrients from the tube to maintain energy or gain weight. I am 5’10’’ and weigh 95 lbs. The feeding tube has to be replaced in my digestive tract, a procedure I’m not able to get for a few months. Even then, my insurance won’t cover enough formula for the tube to be a long-term solution. Fibromyalgia treatments haven’t worked for me, and I have symptoms that are undiagnosed and unexplained. I am out of school. I spend most days sedentary, confined to the house.

My symptoms are no longer bearable, and I can no longer pursue my dreams of international volunteering, teaching, helping minority students, and working in inner-city schools. I rarely even have the energy to do simple household tasks, like fold laundry or cook food. I am lonely, confused, and very, very ill. I am asking for funding, now, because I need help making my illness manageable. I am dependent on my mother, who is struggling financially, and I am unable to support my own medical tests or feeding tube equipment. However, I am seeing doctors who have new ideas about tests and treatments that might help.

I ask for small amounts of help from some kind people so that I may become more equipped in my battle against illness, and better able to manage my symptoms and support myself. I don’t expect support for an extended period of time, and I don’t ask for pity. I just hope that, with a small push, I may find some clarity and hope in my tough situation, and that I may be able to pursue a fulfilling life in spite of illness.