QT Muslim Femme Activist House Funds, Escaping DV
Donation protected
I am creating this fundraiser for a friend in need of URGENT help!
PLEASE LEAVE ALL DONATIONS AS ANONYMOUS AS TO PROTECT THE IDENTITY OF THE PERSON WHO NEEDS THESE FUNDS!!!
**Trigger warning: domestic violence, abuse, sexual assault. Please see their story below:
"I'm an organizer, activist, a queer and trans person of color who identifies as Muslim. I have done a lot of food justice & community aid work, femme empowerment workshops, work as an intensive outpatient therapist for teens with co occurring disorders, advocate actively for prison abolition among many other things.
Despite all these amazing things, I have spent the majority of my marriage (4 years) with someone who uses housing and financial resources as a weapon.
This fundraiser is to gather money in order to urgently move out of an unsafe home. I am blamed for their violent outbursts that result in them breaking my personal belongings and forms of communication with the outside world (eg. stomping out my cell phone when I have no money to get home from a state away or ripping my notes about an argument right out of my hands, gifts I'd made or given them) Most recently I have been threatened to be taken to court (for who knows what reason) and have my medical records on display for being neurodivergent and having hereditary mental health diagnoses. I have three letters of support from my consistent mental health professionals and have never missed a dose of my medication. I have never been a harm to others, let alone myself...
It started by guilting me into being together or being asked to leave after 2 weeks of knowing each other, because they had an "impressionable" child. Then it turned into telling me that I could do better than my family and moving me far away from my friends, again for the child. I took care of the child day and night. Drop offs, pick ups, on top of full time work, full time school, and full time internship. I would cook three meals a day and do all other household chores. It was "magical" and we got married within 10 months of knowing each other. The months following, arguments became progressively worse and closer in time. Each time I had to prove why I deserved to be there. As our parenting agreement has changed with their ex wife now, we have our child much less and they can no longer mask the violence.
I am told I am a hoe, a bitch, stupid, crazy, manipulative, "something is seriously wrong with [me], and even that "[I] am used to laying down and taking it"...despite knowing that I am an incest and childhood & adulthood sexual assault survivor. I have had to sleep in my car at times because of the intensity at which I am screamed at. Sometimes they get so close, my face is covered in spit. Most recently they lost their voice for a week because of it... There is no longer any way for them to deny it, as a neighbor on Eid day, witnessed it (from their porch) and acknowledged it as well, yet they continue to gas light me that it ever happened. I have served them with a cease and desist order and I am navigating the exit as carefully as I can.
When it first began, they used to at least apologize and ask for me back- at this point they tell me I deserve it. It has been nerve wrecking to attempt to tell friends, as the few people I have told said "Oh wow, I could never imagine them doing that! I can't make sense of it?" and this also has felt invalidating. So, I have gotten an emotional support dog, to help with and chose life just one more time -EVERY time.
There is no biological family to lean on, as they stepped out of my life for good after I chose to get married to them, maybe they saw something I didn't? I have lost everything for this relationship, and none of my activist work has kept me any more safe from being a victim of domestic violence. There is no shame in being a survivor. I urge others, who have been in my position, to believe this as well. A brighter day will come & it starts with leaving. No matter how tough times get, breathing and knowing that no one is around the corner - is the best feeling in the world.
I need these funds in order to survive my first month at minimum. I have to buy new furniture and have serious food allergens that can make grocery shopping both stressful and expensive. Anything additional is extremely helpful and my pup & I would be SO grateful. When I am able, and over time - I vow to return the funds you have assisted me with, back into the community. I send you all my love and a part of my peace, as I transition to this new path. Thank you so much for helping out, and eid mubarak. "
(Fundraiser image is not original and taken from google)
PLEASE LEAVE ALL DONATIONS AS ANONYMOUS AS TO PROTECT THE IDENTITY OF THE PERSON WHO NEEDS THESE FUNDS!!!
**Trigger warning: domestic violence, abuse, sexual assault. Please see their story below:
"I'm an organizer, activist, a queer and trans person of color who identifies as Muslim. I have done a lot of food justice & community aid work, femme empowerment workshops, work as an intensive outpatient therapist for teens with co occurring disorders, advocate actively for prison abolition among many other things.
Despite all these amazing things, I have spent the majority of my marriage (4 years) with someone who uses housing and financial resources as a weapon.
This fundraiser is to gather money in order to urgently move out of an unsafe home. I am blamed for their violent outbursts that result in them breaking my personal belongings and forms of communication with the outside world (eg. stomping out my cell phone when I have no money to get home from a state away or ripping my notes about an argument right out of my hands, gifts I'd made or given them) Most recently I have been threatened to be taken to court (for who knows what reason) and have my medical records on display for being neurodivergent and having hereditary mental health diagnoses. I have three letters of support from my consistent mental health professionals and have never missed a dose of my medication. I have never been a harm to others, let alone myself...
It started by guilting me into being together or being asked to leave after 2 weeks of knowing each other, because they had an "impressionable" child. Then it turned into telling me that I could do better than my family and moving me far away from my friends, again for the child. I took care of the child day and night. Drop offs, pick ups, on top of full time work, full time school, and full time internship. I would cook three meals a day and do all other household chores. It was "magical" and we got married within 10 months of knowing each other. The months following, arguments became progressively worse and closer in time. Each time I had to prove why I deserved to be there. As our parenting agreement has changed with their ex wife now, we have our child much less and they can no longer mask the violence.
I am told I am a hoe, a bitch, stupid, crazy, manipulative, "something is seriously wrong with [me], and even that "[I] am used to laying down and taking it"...despite knowing that I am an incest and childhood & adulthood sexual assault survivor. I have had to sleep in my car at times because of the intensity at which I am screamed at. Sometimes they get so close, my face is covered in spit. Most recently they lost their voice for a week because of it... There is no longer any way for them to deny it, as a neighbor on Eid day, witnessed it (from their porch) and acknowledged it as well, yet they continue to gas light me that it ever happened. I have served them with a cease and desist order and I am navigating the exit as carefully as I can.
When it first began, they used to at least apologize and ask for me back- at this point they tell me I deserve it. It has been nerve wrecking to attempt to tell friends, as the few people I have told said "Oh wow, I could never imagine them doing that! I can't make sense of it?" and this also has felt invalidating. So, I have gotten an emotional support dog, to help with and chose life just one more time -EVERY time.
There is no biological family to lean on, as they stepped out of my life for good after I chose to get married to them, maybe they saw something I didn't? I have lost everything for this relationship, and none of my activist work has kept me any more safe from being a victim of domestic violence. There is no shame in being a survivor. I urge others, who have been in my position, to believe this as well. A brighter day will come & it starts with leaving. No matter how tough times get, breathing and knowing that no one is around the corner - is the best feeling in the world.
I need these funds in order to survive my first month at minimum. I have to buy new furniture and have serious food allergens that can make grocery shopping both stressful and expensive. Anything additional is extremely helpful and my pup & I would be SO grateful. When I am able, and over time - I vow to return the funds you have assisted me with, back into the community. I send you all my love and a part of my peace, as I transition to this new path. Thank you so much for helping out, and eid mubarak. "
(Fundraiser image is not original and taken from google)
Organizer
Darcey Lintada
Organizer
Maryland, NY
