One More shot at a pro card

This is a very hard thing for me to do as I know there are more important deserving people that need help. But my friends have suggested this a possible place for me reach people that may help.   2001 I was over weight, fighting debilitating migraines, depressed and in a physically and mentally abusive relationship.  I turned to the gym for a solution to my weight.  Not only did it help me become physically stronger,  it gave me an internal strength.  I got the strength to leave that abusive marriage and with 3 kids to raise I continued to train and compete in bodybuilding while working 2 jobs.   Though not completely gone my migraines were manageable.  The gym has and will always be my solice as I fight depression on a daily basis.   2006 I remarried and this relationship too ended years later.  This time with heartbreaking infidelity.  I was in a VERY dark place,  with the depression taking hold of my every thought.  My migraines at an all time high,  physically making me sick, and unable to do any normal daily tasks.  I became suicidal and could not even get myself out of bed for days at a time.  My dreams of becoming a pro bodybuilder shattered with my marriage.  After a week in bed with a few  crumbs of food and minimal fluids I pulled myself out of bed.  I thought if I could just move and get back in the gym, I can fight and beat this dark depression as I have in the past.  I got on the treadmill in my home and pushed thru the dark pulling me back to bed where it was safe.  Later that night I was in the ER with a pulmonary embolism from a Deep vein thrombosis (blood clot) in my right calf.  I spent 5 days in the hospital and 7 months on blood thinners.  My life feeling more hopless then ever.  I know most don't believe or understand the fight depression really is.  It's not just something a person can "just get over".  It attacks and devours you at any given time.  The gym and my goal to become pro bodybuilder was my focus to drive me thru.  Now I felt like I had nothing.   My migraines became so bad I was in and out of the ER.   I stopped competing and training consistently for 5 years and was at an all time low.  I lost my business (gym) and was in great debt.  I couldn't work as migraines were debilitating. I slowly pulled myself out of my rabbit hole with the help of my therapist.  I started back training and eating better.  I started dating again and having a social life again.  I  started getting botox injections for migraines and the headaches are 95% gone. Tho most days are good I still fight the black hole of depression.  It is a daily battle.   I put the pro card back on the table in January 2017 and decided it was time to kick depressions Ass!! My goal was get back on stage before my 50th birthday.  I DID IT! I was re-qualified for a national contest now.  I planned on competing in 2018 at a pro qualifying event.  But again another road block went up.  I had to have sugery on my distal bicep tendon and would be out of work and the gym for months.  The Dark monster saw his opportunity to take over.   I now wake every day fighting the monster.... I recovered from sugery and training to get back where I was. I have a coach paid for the year and I am working, but I have had some financial set backs. Competing is not cheap! I thought I could do it alone but things around my house keep breaking down. So I am reaching out for any help. I appreciate anything you can do for me. Thank you for taking the time to read my story, and for any help.