My Final Days of Being Here

Hello,

My name is Alysha, and I have fought so hard to Stay on this side of heaven. My prayer has always been that God would bless me with the ability to raise my children. From there lay my eyes on my grand babies and assist in raising them as well. However, because of my prognosis, I will not be granted either. The last two years, I fought with everything in me to stay here for my children. Having a second round with cancer, this time it being labeled TERMINAL, has shattered my children and I to pieces. So many prayers seeking answers, so many tears shed not understanding why.

In November of 2022 the chemotherapy stopped therapy stopped working. Since then the doctors has tried other study trials that has sense then been declared useless.

Yet I still Refused to fathom the idea that they will be become orphans or placed with unsafe people who would emotionally, mentally, and yes Even physically destroy them once I'm gone. Here me, I've been fighting with all I had, all I have to remain here.

I'm broken hearted that what seem to be a simple prayer, was answered with the news I did not want to hear. That I'm approaching the end of life, and must get my affairs in order. I've prayed against it, fasted for a miracle, went to the chemotherapy treatments, experimented with herbal solutions, and God's answer has not changed.

Throughout this journey, it's been my children and I mostly, with a couple of God sent angels who helped in assisted me along the way. Outside of that, my children and I had to make do with the hand I was given.

My oldest daughter playing a crucial role in my care. I'm going to miss that girl so much. I'm going to miss all of my children. I am preparing this Gofundme from the hospital room, where my oldest daughter and I have cried all we could cry. I wouldn't wish this feeling of helplessness or this experience on my worst enemy. Having to hold my teenager and kiss her a million times as we both cried. Hearing her say in-between the sobbing and tears "why won't God heal you? I don't want to lose you mama"

-broke me.

There's nothing I can do, and I really don't have the correct words to say that would heal her heart. All four of my babies has had to watch me decline over time, and I'm so tired yall. I must say I'm so proud of them because all of them were and are completely understanding of my limitations.

With death slowing creeping upon me, I still managed to care for them and I Thank God He granted me this ability. However, because of my health I am slowly losing the ability to continue on.

The cancer has spread to my liver, the tumor is so huge is covers the entire lower part of my stomach. It is bringing an alarm to my surrounding organs as well. I do not have life insurance because once diagnosed with something as serious as this, I no longer qualify for services.

It is my wish that all who reads my story in part that you will graciously donate towards my funeral and burial expenses. Allowing my children to have an opportunity to give an proper goodbye to the one that loved them the most.

The one who fought hard as hell to be here to love, nurture, teach, protect, and demonstrate how to live with character, gratitude, forgiveness, generosity, integrity,

Me, their mother. ♥️

To my children, if I never get the ability to write all my words of forever love down, I just want you all to know I love every one of you dearly. You all have blessed my life, especially towards the end. The jokes and laughter, movie nights, cuddling, exploring the city, shopping, feeding the homeless, competitive and hilarious Bible studies, simply lying next to me and being present,

So many beautiful memories you all have given me. Mama love all of you so so much. I lived a long life of abuse, and I'm beyond grateful that God handpicked each and every one of you to do life with me. Because of yall, jetta, najaa, chewy, and Joenee I was able to experience and embrace unconditional love. You all are such great children, some nights I cry that I won't be able to be here to watch yall succeed in life, and do greater things than me. But I will rooting for you all on the other side. Thank you so much for always being helpful, loving, and obedient children. Thank you my 4 heartbeats for praying for me when my body was fighting against the pain. For loving me while I healthy, while I was sick, and soon when I'm gone.

I will never stop loving yall, but my love will continue on in the next life. Yall have made mama so proud. Love you, love you, love you, love you forever.

I'm going to miss yall unique differences in personality, humor, and creativity. Gosh, this hurts like hell. Always remember to keep God first and He will direct your path. It's his decision to fully take over from here, and although I don't want to leave my position as yall mother

I must. I have no choice. His plans for your life is beyond what I could do. Trust Him. He is a far better parent than me. It has been an honor to be you all mother. The best opportunity and assignment I was ever given. Love you all so much.

Thank you to every donor who will come across this page, and bless us. Who will play a crucial part in my homegoing and whatever is left over will go to the care of my beautiful children. I've fought so hard, but now it's time that I prepare for my transition.

While my children prepare as well. Again all proceeds will go to my funeral, burial, their attire, and care.

Thank you for reading.

Thank you for supporting.

Thank you for donating.