; In case you don't know me or haven't seen my website,
I'm a stand-up comedian and writer. I’m also a transgender man and don’t want to have boobs anymore. Please help me remove them. Surgery costs will ultimately total $6600. If you're able, consider donating or sharing this campaign.
Some details: Before my transition, I spent much of my waking life trying to pin down moments where I felt essentially man, woman, lesbian, non-binary, butch. Nothing stuck. Instead, I focused my energy on making individual decisions-- cutting my hair, buying new clothes, taking testosterone-- and monitored my feelings. These changes felt good, so I embraced them.
Top surgery is another such decision. My boobs are small. Like an instinct, the discomfort appears easy to rationalize away. You tell yourself it’s not that bad, that nobody feels completely at home in their body, that lots of people wear bras everyday and binding’s pretty much the same, that top surgery won’t solve your social anxiety or your general self-loathing. Still, the discomfort lingers. It gnaws.
The first thing I knew about myself was that I was awkward-- an awkward lesbian, then an awkward guy. Later I came to know my kindness, my ambition, my earnestness. As I further cultivate these values, some of that awkwardness has fallen away. Things are so different from when I was twelve years old at all girls Catholic school writing a suicide letter with a red gel pen. I’m married. We have a cat. I’ve just reduced hours at my day job to focus more energy on making money from my art, which is already going better than expected. Each day, I am, quite literally, overwhelmed with my good fortune. But then I look in the mirror after I get out of the shower, and I’m twelve again. I’ve made myself physically ill looking at my chest in the mirror too long. Only now that my life is so good am I able to see this suffering as unnecessary. I am only recently able to believe the joy so often available to cis people can be mine.
My surgery is scheduled for May 23rd of this year. Insurance is covering a little bit of the surgery, but I just don't have $6000 lying around. If you’re able to donate any amount, even a few dollars, I’d be so grateful. If you can’t donate, please don’t feel pressured to. You’re encouraged to share this campaign in any way you choose. Perhaps you have one million Instagram followers, or one million grandmas you play Mahjong with. Try the grandmas, grandmas love me. If you’d rather not donate, consider subscribing to my weekly newsletter
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Thanks everyone. You’ve all helped me so much over the years, in so many big ways. I’m humbled beyond expression. Really, thank you.