Help Grieving Parents Support Each Other

Help Grieving Parents Support Each Other – in Memory of Ethan Stevens

Six months after our teenage son Ethan passed away from T-Cell Leukaemia, I returned to work as a psychologist. Soon after, my focus was on finding a way to help parents and carers who were also bearing the deep ache of child loss.

I remember, as we slowly picked up the pieces of our broken family, that it was unwavering love and support from our family, friends and the Moranbah community that helped us keep putting one foot in front of the other. It was gratitude for this support that gave me an idea of how I could help.

Why does Lived Experience matter?

There is nothing quite like the feeling of relief when you feel immediately and completely understood by someone who has walked in your shoes. After Ethan's passing, I joined several Facebook pages for child loss and felt grateful that it gave parents the opportunity to share their feelings, beliefs, and ideas with other parents who were also living with child loss. I remember when I felt brave enough to make a post on these pages, to share Ethan's story and my own heartbreak, that I felt a bond with these parents, one that made me feel safe to share my vulnerability. I was also saddened to read that many parents had not only lost their child or children, but also the support of their family, friends, and colleagues who were unable to emotionally support them through their grief.

With this in mind, I set out to design an App that would help grieving parents and carers to easily find and connect with each other in their local area. It takes the opportunity that Facebook offers one step further. My vision is, when local connections are made, parents and carers will feel more supported and less alone and keep building on these meaningful connections. This will lead to face-to-face contact, such as meeting for coffee or starting a local fishing group. I want to help their heavy hearts feel less lonely and isolated as they navigate the bumpy road of child loss. The ripple effects of healing are far reaching and can carry through many generations.

How will the Kids Connecting Parents App help grieving parents?

Eighteen months ago, I started designing the Kids Connecting Parents (KCP) App. It is a global, social, geolocation connection app that allows grieving parents and carers to easily search for and connect directly with each other in their local area. It can be used at home or away from home, and connections can be one-on-one or as a group. It is my hope that once connections are made, parents will spend time together and create their own strong support networks. The App is for any parent or carer who has raised a child as their own. An example is that a mum could search for another mum who was of a similar age, who lived within a certain distance from her, and who’s child had passed at a similar age, or a dad could search for other dad’s and start a group who do activities together such as fishing.

I have spent the past year searching for funding via grants and philanthropy, and unfortunately have been unsuccessful in my applications. Let’s face it, $250, 000 is not small change. These funding rejections did make me question my goals, I am also a grieving parent, and child loss can be unrelenting and heavy to carry, but thankfully Ethan showed me how to be resilient in the face of fear and uncertainty. Not long after his diagnosis, as we were walking out the door to attend his first out-patient chemotherapy treatment, he saw tears in my eyes. He turned to me and said “Mum, don’t cry for me, let’s just do this”. Ethan passed away 7 weeks later. After he passed, I found a quote on his phone that he had downloaded during his treatments, it said “If opportunity doesn’t knock, build a dam door”. This GoFundMe is that door, and I’m hoping you will help me build it, make it strong, and never let it close.

How will Donations be spent?

100% of donations will be utilised to cover the cost of building and running the KCP App for the first 12 months. This includes the build, testing and launch of the app, as well as marketing, and business operation costs such as legal and insurance.

Our campaign goal is $250, 000, broken down like this:

● $74, 000 Total Build and Beta Testing (IOS/Android/Desktop)

● $28, 000 Bug Fixes (12 months)

● $59, 000 Ongoing improvements and upgrades (12 months)

● $69, 000 Hosting Fees, Legal, Insurance, Marketing, Regulation and Compliance, Rollout

● $20, 000 Other working capital requirements

The estimated launch time of the KCP App is 3 months from the date funding is reached.

With Much Thanks and Gratitude

Thank you for taking the time to read our story, we would be most grateful if you could please help spread the word by sharing this link with friends and family. We greatly appreciate any help or contribution towards building the KCP App and look forward to sharing updates on the App’s progress. To find out more about the KCP App and how it can help parents and carers who are living with child loss, please visit kidsconnectingparents.com, contact details are also listed there. I can’t tell you how grateful I am to finally have the courage to write this, and I’m thankful for this opportunity to help other grieving parents build their personal and community support networks and find some light in their darkest days.

If you have stories, suggestions or comments that you wish to share, please contact me directly or leave a message at https://www.kidsconnectingparents.com using the “Contact Us” page.

In loving memory of our warrior and football loving son, Ethan, we, the Stevens Family, are truly appreciative of your consideration to help make the KCP App a reality.