Help the Ultimate Helper: Andy’s Cancers Fight
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Sometimes the person that is always helping others needs the most help. My friend Andrew is in this situation. He has three beautiful children, 11,8, and 3. Every time we talk he speaks of making memories for them, creating security and support for them before his time is up, and helping them express their feelings. He works hard to provide for them as a single dad.
Andrew is also battling two types of terminal cancer(T cell Lymphoma and Carcinoid cancer with full syndrome) and the complications that often manifest with these cancers. He's currently in a boot and awaiting surgery for his foot and possibly for his shoulder in September - while these are somewhat nromal injuries for a person with an active life-style - Andrew's case is automatically more complicated because of his cancer diagnoses. He has to consider quality of life and post-surgery complications that otherwise healthy people don't have to consider.
Now that Andrew has two serious diagnoses, he needs to focus on caring for himself and for his kids. Yet he keeps helping others. We need to help Andrew and his children. Andrew wants to leave his house for the kids, but they need to pay the normal everyday bills, manage travel to Ohio State for his testing and treatment, save for final expenses, and try to stay healthy enough to keep making memories and setting up a support system for his kids. Help me— together we can give Andrew peace of mind about his kids futures and allow him the gift of peace and focus as he fights to stay with his family for as long as possible. If you know Andrew — if he has impacted your life in some way- I encourage you to share your story with me— I will post it and pictures— but also if your feel led, please share and donate. This deserving family desperately needs help to stay in their house and set up the kids to be okay when Andrew passes on.
I have four stories to share: The first is the story of Andrew's relationship with legend Dee Gant - it's an amazing story that blew me away. The second is my personal story and connection with Andrew; the third is from a fellow soccer coach about Andy's dedication to the support, his kids, and the children he coaches; and the fourth is a story from a dear friend who Andrew helped to achieve and still helps to maintain his sobriety, despite incredible obstacles. If Andrew has helped you, please share and comment your story - let's help Andrew - he's helped so many of us....
Dee Gant: In 1997, three days after his high school graduation, Andrew started working for Pat Dakin on his Commercial Metal Fabrcates topfuel team TF 303 . That's where Andrew worked under Dee Gant. Dee quickly became Andrew's mentor and good friend, Andrew spent a lot of time on the weekends helping Dee get his church ready for his antique shop and Apartment above. In late 1998, After Dakin's accident, Dee moved on to All star Helicopters. Dee would have Andrew come up weekly for lunch and to do paint work .
Andrew talks about D with a big smile on his face. "We just had fun working together (and we both have tempers!). When Dee went work for Watermen RACING pumps in Indianapolis, they only saw or talked to each other here and there for a few years, yet they maintained tabs on one another.
Then there was a day that changed both their lives -- and their fights... . Andrew was walking into the hospital and saw Dee walking off the elevator... after a few "what the #$%# are you doing here" they found out they both had Cancer. After that moment, they both could tell you that their 20-year friendship, got a deeper bond between them. They made their appointments for the same days. Not many people knew when Andrew had sepsis and nearly died.....Dee was there. Dee also spent hours with Andrew in the ICU right after Chemotherapy.
Andrew says that it was great - "The nurses didn't know how to handle us - ha!" . They were unfiltered - and fun - despite the circumstance. Andrew and Dee talked about food all the time. As Dee's condition worsened, what ever Dee wanted we got him, or Andrew learned how to cook.
From Andrew, " When one one of your closest friends is going through the same fight as you, your minds are in the same place. I really miss him so much every day. I wouldn't really call it taking care of him - it was more like having a sleep over with your best friend. Especially now that I'm going through the same stuff he had, but his was more advanced.
The hardest day was when I had to call hospice , he was so sad in the back of the ambulance as they were taking him to hospice, So I flicked him off.... and in our true fashion that started him flicking me off at every red light -- all the way to hospice. It was great.
In Dee's last hours we listened to our favorite DVD, Stevie Ray Vaughan and Albert King. It was my privilege and honor to be his friend.
Swapping Care giving stories - being there for each other....
I'd like to share a personal story: My name is Liz -My sister is bipolar and battles addiction- it’s a rough road for me and my family - one we've been wrestling with for more than a decade. It is our situation to manage and we've done a pretty good job, but care giving is wildly stressful. I don't know who I'm getting when I talk to my sister - and I know that she often tells me what she thinks I might want to hear, which is not helpful when she's in the middle of a bipolar swing and then adds to it with her drug of choice....
Andrew and I connected over a care giving stories - he's cared for family members battling depression and bipolar as well. He's also a single dad with two cancers committed to co-parenting with their mom, and raising his three small kids. Despite his struggles, he wants to know how I'm holding up - how my sister is doing -- and if there's anything he can do to help. He spent two years taking classes at NAMI to be a better communicator with his loved ones that need help and discovered that it also helped him. He shares resources with me and we've reviewed resources to send to my sister. He's shared books he's read about depression that have helped him. He didn't have to do any of this - we could just share sad stories and lean on each other for some normal conversation - -but he strives to do more. I love his Dee Gantt stories - to hang with a legend like that and just talk about it like it was just what one does.... ..Mr. Gantt must have been an incredible person - I know Andrew feels lucky to have known him. Andrew's goal is to make memories for his kids -- to be more and learn and grown - . even with these diagnoses and the physical and emotional pain that comes with those diagnoses. It's tough with this type of diagnoses and his active lifestyle because what folks don't see is that for every awesome day of making memories - Andy spends time at doctor's visits or at home, in pain. This makes it nearly impossible to get the basic done around the house - and so many doctor's visits has made it difficult to keep up with the bills. It's why I started this fundraiser- because Andrew needs help and assistance through great organizations (e.g., Susan G. Komen) simply does not exist for single dads...
Justin Weiss - High School friend and sober for a 9 months - thanks to Andrew...
Let me tell you about my friend Andrew. He is the most selfless, caring, and God fearing man I have known. Not so long ago I had a problem. An addiction. I am an alcoholic (recovering). I was so deep in it was affecting my health. My liver was on the brink of cirrhosis and I was in a fight for my life. There was Andy. Right by my side. Not literally but I'm sure he would have been. He spent many late nights on the phone threatening to take me to the VA where I could get help if I didn't take control of it. It was his constant barrage of I love you and God loves you and your kids need you that got me to where I needed to quit. I can say that I am just shy of 9 months sober! My life has changed. My health has improved, and my kids are happier than ever with me. Andy whilst dealing with cancer and his own personal problems took the time to let me know he had my back. He was a constant voice to lead me to greater things. He now is in his own fight battling two cancers and a plethora of other issues and he still finds the time to bring me up, check on me, and encourage me to be the man God had intended me to be. He is again, the most selfless loving man I have in my life. He is an inspiration to me and continues to be an example of what love can do! Please take a moment and read his story and find it in your heart to help him in any way you can. Andrew you are my rock brother!
Fellow Soccer Coach letter of Support: Despite his diagnoses, Andy leads a very active lifestyle -his belief is that it's important to make memories while you on this planet to do so.... He coaches select soccer for Eclipse in Middletown, Ohio. Here is a letter from one of his fellow coaches...
My name is Joe Mullins I'm writing on behalf of Andrew Dilldine and his
daughter Addison. I've had the pleasure of coaching with Andrew and
helping to mentor him as a coach. He is amazing with these kids and all
these young ladies on our team love him. He runs with these girls plays
and laughs with these girls with a smile on his face even when he is in
pain. I've also had the honor to see him as a father. Not just with
Addison but with his other children as well. I find him to be an
extremely good father and a father who teaches his children to fight
through adversity not by words but his example. Not all the kids know
but some due that he is in the fight for his life and he shows them not
to give up that you fight everyday and live everyday as though it's your
last.
He is extremely supportive of his kids, and one of the few people I
trust to take my kids to practice and bring them back to my house if I
can't make it. My daughter has been over to his home several times
and she hates leaving because they have so much fun.
As far as Addison goes, As a former college football coach at Ohio
Mid-Western I wished college kids had the drive that she has. She is
always working on her game even without being told too. She is the
first off the field and the first back to it for water breaks she instantly
gets a ball and works on her moves. I've coached a lot of sports in my
life and I've played sports my whole life and still do and I've only seen a
handful of players with her drive. I've literally coached hundreds of kids
and I can tell you right now that young lady has amazing potential in
the great game of soccer.
When I stop by Andrews's house just to talk about life in general
she always makes it a point to come up to me and tells me "Coach Joe I
appreciate what you do for us and thank you./I She then will say "what
else do I need to work on, on my own to get better?" Only great players
do that, I honestly believe if she is not allowed to play soccer your
taking a real chance of not allowing that kid a free higher education. I
also believe if you take soccer away from that kid, you're forcing her to
lose her first love. That young lady lives and breathes soccer. I consider
her to be one of the leaders of our team and a great friend and role
model to my own daughter!
THANKYOU
JOE MULLINS
Please consider helping me friend and his children. There's nothing more important to Andy than being there for his kids. With this fight on his hands, he's got to be able to focus on them - on creating a support structure for them; ensuring they can go to college even though he will not likely be around for that; and ensuring that they always have a home. Thank you!!
Andrew is also battling two types of terminal cancer(T cell Lymphoma and Carcinoid cancer with full syndrome) and the complications that often manifest with these cancers. He's currently in a boot and awaiting surgery for his foot and possibly for his shoulder in September - while these are somewhat nromal injuries for a person with an active life-style - Andrew's case is automatically more complicated because of his cancer diagnoses. He has to consider quality of life and post-surgery complications that otherwise healthy people don't have to consider.
Now that Andrew has two serious diagnoses, he needs to focus on caring for himself and for his kids. Yet he keeps helping others. We need to help Andrew and his children. Andrew wants to leave his house for the kids, but they need to pay the normal everyday bills, manage travel to Ohio State for his testing and treatment, save for final expenses, and try to stay healthy enough to keep making memories and setting up a support system for his kids. Help me— together we can give Andrew peace of mind about his kids futures and allow him the gift of peace and focus as he fights to stay with his family for as long as possible. If you know Andrew — if he has impacted your life in some way- I encourage you to share your story with me— I will post it and pictures— but also if your feel led, please share and donate. This deserving family desperately needs help to stay in their house and set up the kids to be okay when Andrew passes on.
I have four stories to share: The first is the story of Andrew's relationship with legend Dee Gant - it's an amazing story that blew me away. The second is my personal story and connection with Andrew; the third is from a fellow soccer coach about Andy's dedication to the support, his kids, and the children he coaches; and the fourth is a story from a dear friend who Andrew helped to achieve and still helps to maintain his sobriety, despite incredible obstacles. If Andrew has helped you, please share and comment your story - let's help Andrew - he's helped so many of us....
Dee Gant: In 1997, three days after his high school graduation, Andrew started working for Pat Dakin on his Commercial Metal Fabrcates topfuel team TF 303 . That's where Andrew worked under Dee Gant. Dee quickly became Andrew's mentor and good friend, Andrew spent a lot of time on the weekends helping Dee get his church ready for his antique shop and Apartment above. In late 1998, After Dakin's accident, Dee moved on to All star Helicopters. Dee would have Andrew come up weekly for lunch and to do paint work .
Andrew talks about D with a big smile on his face. "We just had fun working together (and we both have tempers!). When Dee went work for Watermen RACING pumps in Indianapolis, they only saw or talked to each other here and there for a few years, yet they maintained tabs on one another.
Then there was a day that changed both their lives -- and their fights... . Andrew was walking into the hospital and saw Dee walking off the elevator... after a few "what the #$%# are you doing here" they found out they both had Cancer. After that moment, they both could tell you that their 20-year friendship, got a deeper bond between them. They made their appointments for the same days. Not many people knew when Andrew had sepsis and nearly died.....Dee was there. Dee also spent hours with Andrew in the ICU right after Chemotherapy.
Andrew says that it was great - "The nurses didn't know how to handle us - ha!" . They were unfiltered - and fun - despite the circumstance. Andrew and Dee talked about food all the time. As Dee's condition worsened, what ever Dee wanted we got him, or Andrew learned how to cook.
From Andrew, " When one one of your closest friends is going through the same fight as you, your minds are in the same place. I really miss him so much every day. I wouldn't really call it taking care of him - it was more like having a sleep over with your best friend. Especially now that I'm going through the same stuff he had, but his was more advanced.
The hardest day was when I had to call hospice , he was so sad in the back of the ambulance as they were taking him to hospice, So I flicked him off.... and in our true fashion that started him flicking me off at every red light -- all the way to hospice. It was great.
In Dee's last hours we listened to our favorite DVD, Stevie Ray Vaughan and Albert King. It was my privilege and honor to be his friend.
Swapping Care giving stories - being there for each other....
I'd like to share a personal story: My name is Liz -My sister is bipolar and battles addiction- it’s a rough road for me and my family - one we've been wrestling with for more than a decade. It is our situation to manage and we've done a pretty good job, but care giving is wildly stressful. I don't know who I'm getting when I talk to my sister - and I know that she often tells me what she thinks I might want to hear, which is not helpful when she's in the middle of a bipolar swing and then adds to it with her drug of choice....
Andrew and I connected over a care giving stories - he's cared for family members battling depression and bipolar as well. He's also a single dad with two cancers committed to co-parenting with their mom, and raising his three small kids. Despite his struggles, he wants to know how I'm holding up - how my sister is doing -- and if there's anything he can do to help. He spent two years taking classes at NAMI to be a better communicator with his loved ones that need help and discovered that it also helped him. He shares resources with me and we've reviewed resources to send to my sister. He's shared books he's read about depression that have helped him. He didn't have to do any of this - we could just share sad stories and lean on each other for some normal conversation - -but he strives to do more. I love his Dee Gantt stories - to hang with a legend like that and just talk about it like it was just what one does.... ..Mr. Gantt must have been an incredible person - I know Andrew feels lucky to have known him. Andrew's goal is to make memories for his kids -- to be more and learn and grown - . even with these diagnoses and the physical and emotional pain that comes with those diagnoses. It's tough with this type of diagnoses and his active lifestyle because what folks don't see is that for every awesome day of making memories - Andy spends time at doctor's visits or at home, in pain. This makes it nearly impossible to get the basic done around the house - and so many doctor's visits has made it difficult to keep up with the bills. It's why I started this fundraiser- because Andrew needs help and assistance through great organizations (e.g., Susan G. Komen) simply does not exist for single dads...
Justin Weiss - High School friend and sober for a 9 months - thanks to Andrew...
Let me tell you about my friend Andrew. He is the most selfless, caring, and God fearing man I have known. Not so long ago I had a problem. An addiction. I am an alcoholic (recovering). I was so deep in it was affecting my health. My liver was on the brink of cirrhosis and I was in a fight for my life. There was Andy. Right by my side. Not literally but I'm sure he would have been. He spent many late nights on the phone threatening to take me to the VA where I could get help if I didn't take control of it. It was his constant barrage of I love you and God loves you and your kids need you that got me to where I needed to quit. I can say that I am just shy of 9 months sober! My life has changed. My health has improved, and my kids are happier than ever with me. Andy whilst dealing with cancer and his own personal problems took the time to let me know he had my back. He was a constant voice to lead me to greater things. He now is in his own fight battling two cancers and a plethora of other issues and he still finds the time to bring me up, check on me, and encourage me to be the man God had intended me to be. He is again, the most selfless loving man I have in my life. He is an inspiration to me and continues to be an example of what love can do! Please take a moment and read his story and find it in your heart to help him in any way you can. Andrew you are my rock brother!
Fellow Soccer Coach letter of Support: Despite his diagnoses, Andy leads a very active lifestyle -his belief is that it's important to make memories while you on this planet to do so.... He coaches select soccer for Eclipse in Middletown, Ohio. Here is a letter from one of his fellow coaches...
My name is Joe Mullins I'm writing on behalf of Andrew Dilldine and his
daughter Addison. I've had the pleasure of coaching with Andrew and
helping to mentor him as a coach. He is amazing with these kids and all
these young ladies on our team love him. He runs with these girls plays
and laughs with these girls with a smile on his face even when he is in
pain. I've also had the honor to see him as a father. Not just with
Addison but with his other children as well. I find him to be an
extremely good father and a father who teaches his children to fight
through adversity not by words but his example. Not all the kids know
but some due that he is in the fight for his life and he shows them not
to give up that you fight everyday and live everyday as though it's your
last.
He is extremely supportive of his kids, and one of the few people I
trust to take my kids to practice and bring them back to my house if I
can't make it. My daughter has been over to his home several times
and she hates leaving because they have so much fun.
As far as Addison goes, As a former college football coach at Ohio
Mid-Western I wished college kids had the drive that she has. She is
always working on her game even without being told too. She is the
first off the field and the first back to it for water breaks she instantly
gets a ball and works on her moves. I've coached a lot of sports in my
life and I've played sports my whole life and still do and I've only seen a
handful of players with her drive. I've literally coached hundreds of kids
and I can tell you right now that young lady has amazing potential in
the great game of soccer.
When I stop by Andrews's house just to talk about life in general
she always makes it a point to come up to me and tells me "Coach Joe I
appreciate what you do for us and thank you./I She then will say "what
else do I need to work on, on my own to get better?" Only great players
do that, I honestly believe if she is not allowed to play soccer your
taking a real chance of not allowing that kid a free higher education. I
also believe if you take soccer away from that kid, you're forcing her to
lose her first love. That young lady lives and breathes soccer. I consider
her to be one of the leaders of our team and a great friend and role
model to my own daughter!
THANKYOU
JOE MULLINS
Please consider helping me friend and his children. There's nothing more important to Andy than being there for his kids. With this fight on his hands, he's got to be able to focus on them - on creating a support structure for them; ensuring they can go to college even though he will not likely be around for that; and ensuring that they always have a home. Thank you!!
Organizer and beneficiary
Elizabeth Head
Organizer
Middletown, OH
Andrew Dilldine
Beneficiary
