Help Me Heal

I often struggle with my words pen to paper. I have been going back and forth about reaching out for help because I like to consider myself a strong and independent woman who can support herself and overcome anything. I have learned this from my mother. She raised me as a single parent, working two (sometimes three!) jobs to put food on the table. She absolutely hated to take a hand-out, especially ask for one, and I know I am also this way. However, I have realized that even the strongest of women have had to be vulnerable at important moments in their lives. Here is my vulnerable moment: I am a 39 year old woman who also happens to be transgender. I have a lot of privilege, and for this I am grateful and extremely thankful. When I think back to starting hormone therapy, I remember feeling so much happiness and joy to be on my way to who I’ve always known I am. Unfortunately, in Oregon, some of the surgeries I need in order to fully live as my authentic self are not 100% covered with insurance. Now that I have done the work to mentally and socially transition, I am eager to be moving forward in continuing my physical transition! I am super blessed to have insurance through my employer. However, I will be left with a significant remaining balance. In addition to this, I must take between 2-5 weeks off work, depending on how quickly I heal. This is a very scary thing for me, to not have the stability and security of a regular paycheck (especially while I am healing and limited in my abilities). I have some paid sick leave saved but am asking for financial support to help me heal in peace, without worrying about my financial security. Any amount is valuable to me, I am so grateful for this support from my community. I have my first surgery scheduled on July 13, 2020 8am @OHSU with an amazing surgeon with an incredible resume. This surgery includes to be breast implants and some liposuction sculpting. In addition, I have an upcoming consultation for facial feminization surgery. Many of you will never understand why these surgeries are so important to one’s mental health. Most days I struggle with leaving the house without makeup. Although many of you have complimented me on my looks, and of course this boosts ones self esteem, it doesn’t change the fact that without makeup, I see something/someone else, at times i don’t feel like myself, or I may be hyper-focused on things that “out” me or make me “clockable.” This is just my face. I am very aware of how I present myself and the items of clothing I wear. Having these surgeries will help to give me that extra boost of confidence when I go to work, run errands, meet friends, or catch myself in the mirror. I welcome and appreciate ANY financial assistance. Even $1.00 is meaningful and supports me in my goal. I am aware not everyone is in a position to give, I understand that completely! I would love and appreciate a share on your social media accounts (Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, etc). I am also asking to please be put on your prayer list, and for non-praying people, how about you just send mama good vibes?! I LOVE EACH AND EVERYONE OF YOU SO VERY MUCH! I am super blessed to have had the love and support from so many of you in so many ways!!