Denise Maret Needs Your Help
For those of you who are interested, my name is Esther Maret Goetz and I am Denise's sister-in-law and I currently live in NJ. All the funds that are raised on this site will be sent to Tim and Denise on a weekly basis and they will be paying for the treatment with Dr. Buttar. Thank you again for considering a donation to this fund! It means the world to us.
I had the incredible privilege for 15 months of taking care of the most amazingly loving, always steadfast, and hardest fighter on the earth, my mom. That is not something I am saying lightly or because I should say it, I have never, ever met a person who came even close to what she was.
From a toddler up, she was my counselor, my best friend, my confider, the only person with such a drive to make the right choice whatever the cost, and the one I did everything with. From her wealth of ever logical practical and spiritual advice, to her beautiful smile and never ending concern and love, I was incredibly blessed to have her as my mother for 18 years.
Especially being an only child for 8 of those, I grew up spending every waking moment with Mommy. My fondest memories have always been the 200 times together at Home Depot fixing up a house when I was 6, hours spent learning life skills like responsibility and how to deal with employees and customers someday, as she had, and the days spent getting our hands dirty doing a project, cleaning, or organizing, or even spending 8 hours, as she would, picking the perfect paint color. But while her practical knowledge was endless, so was her spiritual. From a very young age, I was exposed to her wealth of self taught knowledge in eschatology, Greek language, deep studies from often dusty books like Ecclesiastes and Jeremiah, and on heated topics in the Christian world she wanted me to have a solely biblical foundation on to decide for myself.
But more than anything else, she taught me to never parent or people please, always keeping my eyes on God, the only one I would ultimately answer to on judgment day. I was always directed, not to her or other people, never horizontally, even though I easily could have been - I was always pointed vertically. She was the only person on this earth who I could pour every part of my heart and mind out to, and she knew me better than any other. She never ignored any issue I came to her with, although when I came bawling my eyes out, she let me know clearly I wouldn't get anywhere in life doing that. Needless to say, it took me longer to learn than it should have.
When her diagnosis, one doctors twice told her was impossible due to how healthy she was at the time, came back as stage 4 rectal cancer, our lives were turned upside down. But our relationship never was, and it grew only stronger through deep losses of everyday life, most outside activities, our symptom-causing home, very close friends, and incredibly fast regrowth twice of her cancer. While she finally began to respond to a treatment that addressed her extreme lead poisoning, the only treatment she ever actually grew stronger on, she began to go downhill for reasons beyond our control.
We were with her right until the very end on September 3rd, 2016. But by God's amazing mercy, she didn't pass tethered to an oxygen tank, feeding tube, or in uncontrollable pain. She went within hours at home, passing on her own terms. Even though she had slowly been getting weaker over about a month, she was eating and talking, with perfect O2 saturation and amazingly steady hemoglobin, until the very night before. She died not from the cancer, but from a rapidly failing liver no treatment could overcome. She held our hands and even when she could no longer speak, her eyes alone kept making sure we were there. As we watched her begin to pass, I caught her eye and told her I loved her, and her response, as, with her last strength, she turned to me, was a surreal, clear "I love you". They were her last words on this earth.
She was an amazing example of the sole verse that came to me in the ER, from the first psalm she taught me as a child;
Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for You are with me; Your rod and your staff, they comfort me.
You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies,
You anoint my head with oil;
My cup overflows.
Surely goodness and lovingkindness will follow me all the days of my life,
And I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever.
She is now dwelling in the house of the Lord, where she always longed to be, free from pain and suffering. And while our pain here is tremendous and the empty recliner, the missing advice and hugs only she could give, the times breaking down when coming across a photo - although they're all so real, so are the memories we have and the knowledge we will see her again.
And no one, except her doctor, could have given her the ability to pass as painlessly as she did, fighting until the very end. He and the incredible nurses at the office were some of the last people she ever mentioned and who she loved so much. It was the treatment she herself chose, and he was only doctor she actually respected. For truly beating cancer is not always winning, it's telling the cancer it’s not the one who calls the shots, you do - and it will not go down without a fight. She called the shots. And she fought until the end.
Thank you for your amazing support and encouragement. She was so thankful for you all, and without you her fight would never have been possible. I have to end here with the words of the familiar song by Chris Tomlin she always requested to be played at her funeral:
I will rise when He calls my name
No more sorrow, no more pain
I will rise on eagle's wings
Before my God, fall on my knees
And rise, I will rise
And I hear the voice of many angels sing
Worthy is the Lamb
And I hear the cry of every longing heart
Worthy is the Lamb
She now is face to face with her Creator and Savior, the only One who redeems the mess we put ourselves in and the death, the tearing apart of lives, that He despises, coming as a result of that. Although she passed through physical death, she will never face eternal death. And we will join her, but this time it will be for all eternity, never to be separated again. The way God always meant for it to be.
Here are the funeral arrangements:
Grace Fellowship Church
2151 Wesley Chapel Road
Indian Trail, NC. 28079
Burial to follow
Thank you again for all your support! In lieu of flowers, please send any donations to:
14732 Cane Field Dr
Charlotte, NC. 28273
Much love and appreciation,
Esther (for Tim and the kids)
From Denise's Family: We just wanted to let you know that Denise passed into the presence of her Savior on Saturday, September 3 at 11:40 am after a 14 month brave battle with cancer. Thank you so much for all your prayers, emotional and financial support during this time. A much longer update will be forthcoming in the next 48 hours. Tentative arrangements are for a funeral on Wednesday, September 7 at 2:00 pm with a burial to follow. More specifics will come tomorrow.
Denise's suffering is now over and of course those who are left behind grieve over the loss of a daughter, mother, and wife. Please continue pray for Tim and the children (Cara 18, Alyssa 10 and Corban 8) as they navigate this time together.
Tim and his family find themselves in continued need of financial support since the cost of the medical care was only partially covered by your many generous donations and their very limited medical insurance. If you find it something you would still like to do, please send any donations to:
14732 Cane Field Dr.
Charlotte N.C. 28273
We are very sad at this time, but so grateful to God for the care He provided and for allowing Denise to be with us for an extra year, thanks to your prayers and help. God is good all the time!
With Thankful Hearts,
All the Maret and Frank Families
PS. Look for another update within the next 48 hours.
We're excited as well to get the news that the fluid for the AARSOTA is on its way, and it will be 2 weeks until I start the third round. It's taken almost 6 weeks to get the peritoneal fluid, but kind doctors (and an extraordinary nurse) finally pulled the strings for us. We're excited as this is what they will pull the tumor markers out of, and the closer to the cancer, the more concentrated the markers obviously are, and these shots will directly target both the remaining liver and rectal cancer.
One big disappointment, however, came in the mail last week, when we found out our Christian medical sharing group refused to pay any part of treatment. We submitted only the bills almost every insurance reimburses, like standard labs, cancer panels, doctor appointments, and certain conventionally "accepted" treatments, all with CPT codes (and already less than 20% of treatment). Sadly, although they paid for these exact things from other doctors (yes, one was alternative - they must not have thought he was), once they found the cancer is not being treated traditionally, everything was out of the picture. It's sad, considering should not Christians be the first to share a cancer patient's financial burden? And certainly not discriminate against us who are fighting and not accepting our death sentence - considering it also would save them quite a bit (everything we've done for the past 5 months, while almost $100,000, is still not much more than an IV of chemo) But obviously, that's part of life. God has been so good to us through your donations and we are continuing to trust him, especially with this third round coming up. For He "owns the cattle on a thousand hills" (Psalm 50:10) - and we have seen His hand so clear in directing us. The beautiful thing is we know while others may draw lines, He never will. He doesn't worry about what others may think - He wants us to continue this journey and fight for life, and will provide until the day I am cancer free.
Thank you for your relentless prayers - God is using them and encouraging us in the little things, every day. Sorry for this late update, and we will update again when we begin the next round. Take care!"
As it should be; her lasting legacy will be her three babies; to hear Cara, poised, dignified, graceful and inspiring, deliver this love note about her Mom this week. tells you all you need to know what an amazing woman her mother was. Cara; I've said it over and over, darlin; you're a rock star.
What a beautiful letter, Cara. I had the privilege of knowing your mother only briefly and a long time ago. But I remember her exactly as you wrote: so steady and assured in her faith and of her love for the Lord. She was the type of person everyone was impressed with upon first meeting her and I'm glad I was one of them. She is in Heaven now with the Lord she loved and so perfectly emulated when she was here with us. You will see her again and your reunion will be so sweet.
So beautiful and a touching tribute to your amazing mom. It's evident she and your dad raised you so well. I know they are proud, I'm sure of all of you. Thank you Cara for sharing from your heart. You've gone through a lot at a young age but I believe God will use this for His glory and continue making you into a strong woman of God touching many. Prayers going up for all of you.
Praying for you, Esther, and all the Marets
Denise, I am sorry I haven't written you at all. I have a few of my own problems - minor compared to yours. but I do want you to know that I pray for you every day, family too. I am so glad to hear you are feeling stronger.
denise, I know it's been a long time since we have talked but words cannot express how sorry I am to learn that you are sick. my prayers go out to you.