Abusive Family: College Fund Help
Donation protected
Who I am
I am an 19 year old college student in Illinois that does not wish to be controlled by their parents anymore and would like to run away. With their funds, I have been able to go to a University for the last year but I do not want to continue to be dependent on them as I know that it will only cause more damage than good if it were to continue. I'm disappointed to say that I cannot give more information about myself as I am afraid that they'll find this out from others and punish me. I've lived a long life of physical torment but it's mostly been the psychological and mental abuse that I can no longer take. I'm constantly compared to my siblings and have been told numerous times that they do not love me and that I will not succeed. Not only do they hurt me, but they've also verbally attacked my friends and partners. Familial and thankful sentiment has never been in our house and they have never cared about how any of us siblings feel. On numerous occasions I've displayed to them that I was depressed and their reply was that "only idiots get depressed, you're not that much of an idiot. What's wrong with you?" I have tried on numerous occasions to talk to them about their attitudes but nothing has worked as they only see it as disrespectful and we only get belittled for it. I have been unhappy with my situation for years and college opened my eyes to what a good living situation could be- and I don't want to remain connected to these people. So far I've only mentioned the psychological abuse, however, physical abuse has been used on numerous occasions to keep my siblings and I "within order". Truthfully, I have tried hard to keep many of these as repressed memories, however, my most vividly remembered moments are when I am sleeping and they'd hit me on the back of the head. I don't want to go through with this anymore and would love to cut them out of my life completely.
Why I'm asking for money/What I'd use it for
I've been forbidden to drive for years now as I believe that they know that I would run away the first chance I get. I don't think that as long as I am nearby, I would be safe from them being able to find me. Luckily, I am over 18 so they would not be able to get the right paperwork to demand me back from the government. Still, I would like to get away as possible. I do not wish to completely end my future so I've decided that while I would like to continue my college career, I'd like to finish off my degree abroad. I am not entirely sure where, but I do believe that it is my best course of action as I have numerous friends who I've already talked to who would allow me to stay with them and give me help, asides from monetary. I have money saved up already, as I have been planning this for a while now, but it is not nearly enough for everything I expect for. For one, I would need money for travel and some accommodational things once I arrive. Additionally, I would need money for the required applications to different colleges overseas and the trips over to wherever I would need to be interviewed for a visa (again, I'm unable to drive and most likely would have to sneak out as I have only ever been allowed to go outside without them six times throughout my life.) I suspect a lot of other things will have to be paid for as well, but, I am hopeful that I can find a job wherever I go relatively soon with the help of my connections. With that, I am looking for colleges that would be inexpensive, accept the FAFSA, willing to give me aid, and could assist me throughout these next few months with whatever I may deal with.
Additional Comments
I had a really hard time writing these things and to share them with others is something I would not have been able to do on my own. I had a very close friend help me write all of this and in order to continue being hidden about all of this, he will be the one managing it for me (mostly). He also wishes not to be credited but I'll simply call him P. I'm not sure how GoFundMe works but if there's any questions or anything like that, I've asked him to respond on my behalf (after talking to me first). I understand if people may be off put about donating to this and I'll respect that decision. I do hope that you guys could help me out here because I'm genuinely tired of being where I am. I appreciate anybody who can help me out here, even a dollar would help.
Thank you, J.
I am an 19 year old college student in Illinois that does not wish to be controlled by their parents anymore and would like to run away. With their funds, I have been able to go to a University for the last year but I do not want to continue to be dependent on them as I know that it will only cause more damage than good if it were to continue. I'm disappointed to say that I cannot give more information about myself as I am afraid that they'll find this out from others and punish me. I've lived a long life of physical torment but it's mostly been the psychological and mental abuse that I can no longer take. I'm constantly compared to my siblings and have been told numerous times that they do not love me and that I will not succeed. Not only do they hurt me, but they've also verbally attacked my friends and partners. Familial and thankful sentiment has never been in our house and they have never cared about how any of us siblings feel. On numerous occasions I've displayed to them that I was depressed and their reply was that "only idiots get depressed, you're not that much of an idiot. What's wrong with you?" I have tried on numerous occasions to talk to them about their attitudes but nothing has worked as they only see it as disrespectful and we only get belittled for it. I have been unhappy with my situation for years and college opened my eyes to what a good living situation could be- and I don't want to remain connected to these people. So far I've only mentioned the psychological abuse, however, physical abuse has been used on numerous occasions to keep my siblings and I "within order". Truthfully, I have tried hard to keep many of these as repressed memories, however, my most vividly remembered moments are when I am sleeping and they'd hit me on the back of the head. I don't want to go through with this anymore and would love to cut them out of my life completely.
Why I'm asking for money/What I'd use it for
I've been forbidden to drive for years now as I believe that they know that I would run away the first chance I get. I don't think that as long as I am nearby, I would be safe from them being able to find me. Luckily, I am over 18 so they would not be able to get the right paperwork to demand me back from the government. Still, I would like to get away as possible. I do not wish to completely end my future so I've decided that while I would like to continue my college career, I'd like to finish off my degree abroad. I am not entirely sure where, but I do believe that it is my best course of action as I have numerous friends who I've already talked to who would allow me to stay with them and give me help, asides from monetary. I have money saved up already, as I have been planning this for a while now, but it is not nearly enough for everything I expect for. For one, I would need money for travel and some accommodational things once I arrive. Additionally, I would need money for the required applications to different colleges overseas and the trips over to wherever I would need to be interviewed for a visa (again, I'm unable to drive and most likely would have to sneak out as I have only ever been allowed to go outside without them six times throughout my life.) I suspect a lot of other things will have to be paid for as well, but, I am hopeful that I can find a job wherever I go relatively soon with the help of my connections. With that, I am looking for colleges that would be inexpensive, accept the FAFSA, willing to give me aid, and could assist me throughout these next few months with whatever I may deal with.
Additional Comments
I had a really hard time writing these things and to share them with others is something I would not have been able to do on my own. I had a very close friend help me write all of this and in order to continue being hidden about all of this, he will be the one managing it for me (mostly). He also wishes not to be credited but I'll simply call him P. I'm not sure how GoFundMe works but if there's any questions or anything like that, I've asked him to respond on my behalf (after talking to me first). I understand if people may be off put about donating to this and I'll respect that decision. I do hope that you guys could help me out here because I'm genuinely tired of being where I am. I appreciate anybody who can help me out here, even a dollar would help.
Thank you, J.
Organizer
P L
Organizer
Gurnee, IL
