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Took a Breakdown to Get a Break Through

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Hello, my name is Amanda and if you stick with me for just a bit I hope you'll get to know me just a tad.

About four-ish years ago I was a medical surrogate for my little sister who was fighting a war with Cystic Fibrosis while on life support. For any who are not familiar with what a medical surrogate is it is someone who makes the choices for the individual who is currently unable to make their own choices, normally it's towards the end of a life.
During these 11 months I drained my savings making day trips to the hospital hour/ hour and a half away to visit as I still had to work to make ends meet, as most of society does. The visits would be to meet with doctors, see my sister, visit with my sister and mother who never missed a day at her side. Many times I'd be called to her side in a *911* 'say your last goodbyes' to have her pull through.
A hard fought fight that my darling sister fought every day until the end. Her passing shook me to my core even though her and I discussed it in length. It's taken me years to accept it however I am still under debt from her funeral and traveling several times a week.

Since this happened for the first time,  last year I came to terms that I was not in fact strong enough to deal with both constant grief, work, stress, and the passing of both grandmothers within 90 days of each other so I took a four month FMLA from work. I received partial pay in full disclosure as I pay for the insurance.

On Feb 13 2019, I had a mental breakdown that resulted in a suicide attempt and hospitalization. Even with insurance the debt that comes from that is staggering and in itself illness causing. Embedded is a video discussing the attempt, I posted this as I believe it is important to remove the stigma from mental illness and get our stories out there so that as a society we can begin healing.



I have never thought about asking for help but in recent weeks that seems to be all I have needed just a little help.

The next 3 photos are of my sister when she was in the hospital, fighting with everything she had to see all of her family (something in the end she was unable to do).  I want to share these photos with the world.

[Below  from left to right- My Sister Yvonne 22yrs, Myself, our mother Faye] On this day I was requested to visit for 'last goodbyes'.

[Below left to right- myself, my sister Yvonne 22 yrs] This was take on July 19, my birthday. Yvonne was determined we were going to have a party in her room for me through her tremendous pain. The next day I had to decide to put a chest tube (something she never wanted done unless it was a dire situation) in as one of her lungs had collapsed.

[Below left to right- Yvonne 22yrs, our father Ken] This was taken on a Sunday as it was the only day our dad was able to visit as he had to work six day a week.


THIS Is my sister at 18 and one of her healthiest stages.

Organizer

Amanda Cunningham
Organizer
Concord, NC

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